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Welcome to Talking Point - introduce yourself here

Discussion in 'Welcome and how to use Dementia Talking Point' started by Mark_W, Jul 18, 2018.

  1. mickyg1000

    mickyg1000 Registered User

    Apr 27, 2017
    5
    Hi, my name is Mike and my wife has Alzheimers. I am 75 and Diane is 73, she was diagnosed about 18 months ago but has been suffering memory problems prior to that. I find that I have had a steep learning curve about her illness and her condition (and moods) change daily. Looking to share experiences with others and get ideas on how to cope
     
  2. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    5,707
    Male
    Bristol
    Welcome to TP, Mike. We can all identify with your post, sorry you've had such a hard learning curve with Dementia. Have you had a care needs assessment for your wife and carers assessment for yourself to help with any of the caring responsibilities. That would be my first advice if you have not already spoken to Social Services.
    I hope you will start a thread in "I care for a person with Dementia" whenever you are ready to ask for anything specific or just let off steam.
     
  3. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    7,722
    Yorkshire
    #103 Shedrech, Aug 10, 2018
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2018
    hello @mickyg1000
    sorry to read of your wife's diagnosis
    but glad that you thought to come post here on TP - it's certainly a good place to share sympathy and experiences amongst folk who understand
     
  4. Helpless62

    Helpless62 New member

    Aug 10, 2018
    7
    Hello. I have rejoined things were tough three years ago and I joined to access hope and advice. I did not use the forum much it was mainly b3cause my mum was driving me insane. Well mum has gone into a care home about 3 months ago she is 95 with vascular dementia and blindness and a load of other problems. FIl has also got Vascular D and blindness but he can walk just aged 89 and MIL is now at end stage Alzheimers Mil and Fil live 70 miles away so the last 4 years and more have been “a journey “ as they say. I have already posted on the end of life forum
     
  5. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    8,324
    leicester
    Hello @Helpless62 a warm back to TP although the circumstances that you have found yourself in sound very difficult
    I’m sure you will find support and advice on here
     
  6. Linny52

    Linny52 New member

    Aug 9, 2018
    7
    Hi, my mum was diagnosed with dementia yesterday. I first managed to persuade her to see a doctor last September and it has taken until now for a diagnosis, but, the doctor only said dementia and didn't say which type. My mum isn't concerned, she doesn't think there is much wrong only she forgets sometimes, but I think I would like to know, I'm not sure if this is normal or am I being too fussy, wasn't sure if the doctors don't actually mention the words alzheimer's etc to the patient.
     
  7. karaokePete

    karaokePete Registered User

    Jul 23, 2017
    4,830
    N Ireland
    Hello and welcome to the forum. You have come to the right place for information and support.

    The trouble with a dementia diagnosis is that it's impossible to be definitive about the underlying disease until a brain is examined post mortem. Having said that, due to some differences that tend to appear in the early stages it's often possible to make an educated guess, although there can be considerable overlap and no two people are the same. There is an AS Factsheet about the issue and you can find it with this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/sites/default/files/migrate/downloads/what_is_dementia.pdf

    You can see the full publications list here https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list

    As to talking to your mum about things there is a great thread with a lot of tips that can be found here https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/
     
  8. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    8,324
    leicester
    Hello @Linny52 welcome to TP, I’m sure you will find help and support here on the forum
    When my husband was diagnosed he wasn’t told anything, so I think it’s not unusual
    Have you got LPA for your Mum? if so you maybe able to find out more from the doctor without upsetting your Mum
    I am posting the link to the Alzheimer’s society fact sheets if would like to have a read
    https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list
     
  9. Linny52

    Linny52 New member

    Aug 9, 2018
    7
    Thank you nellbells,and karaokepete, for your advice and the links to the fact sheets. I have seen the compassionate communication and do try to follow that, although it is hard sometimes. I will try talking to the nurse next time I speak to her hopefully she may help thank you again it certainly helps to even just write it down on here.
     
  10. Normaleila

    Normaleila Registered User

    Jun 4, 2016
    652
    Hi LuvMum and welcome. This is such a difficult stage. Perhaps you could start a new thread to discuss this further. It certainly could be dementia - my aunt has all sorts of stories about who she sees, who steals from her, who's proposed to her!
    As I say, please start your own thread and keep in touch.
     
  11. Chris59

    Chris59 New member

    Aug 11, 2018
    8
    garfield3 I'm also "doing it from afar". My Mum lives in Norfolk with my step Dad, I live in Spain, my sister lives in USA. Other family members have responded to crisis situations whilst I visit 3 times a year. I'm constantly feeling guilty that I'm not doing enough, worrying what everyone else is thinking of me!
     
  12. Chris59

    Chris59 New member

    Aug 11, 2018
    8
    Hi, we've been aware of my Mum's Alzheimer's for about 4 years now. I moved to Spain 7 years ago so I visit my Mum 3 times a year. My sister lives in USA and visits my Mum for long stays, last one was for 2 months. My Mum lives at home with her husband, my step dad, who is older than her.He has his own health issues including hearing difficulties. We have set up daily home help visits to help my Mum with personal care and meal preparation. Her husband is not capable as My Mum was always the "carer" to him and his daughters, so he's only had experience of being looked after, not the other way around. I feel increasingly guilty that I'm not doing enough and now there's another crisis and my step dad's family have stepped up. I'm looking for advice on how to get proffesional input into what is the best care plan to put in place for my Mum so I will post in the proper forum as this is meant to be introduction!
     
  13. Amethyst59

    Amethyst59 Registered User

    Jul 3, 2017
    5,738
    Female
    Kent
    I have replied to you on your thread ...but no worries. It doesn’t matter too much where you post! It is easier if you have specific queries on a thread as you will have all the replies in one place, for reference.
     
  14. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,205
    Female
    Dundee
  15. Debj

    Debj New member

    Aug 11, 2018
    3
    My Mum has Alzheimer's. It went undiagnosed for a long time and now appears to be middle stage. I've done my best to care for her but live some distance away but it's getting too much physically and emotionally so found your forum for advice and support.
     
  16. Amethyst59

    Amethyst59 Registered User

    Jul 3, 2017
    5,738
    Female
    Kent
  17. midgit

    midgit New member

    Aug 13, 2018
    4
    Hi everyone. I'm so happy to find this site, as most sites seem to be aimed at dementia patient's carers and nothing for the patients themselves. I have done another post but I think I got a bit mixed up and posted it on the wrong page. Anyway, Hello to you all and I look forward to reading the posts on here.
     
  18. karaokePete

    karaokePete Registered User

    Jul 23, 2017
    4,830
    N Ireland
    Hello @midgit, welcome to TP. I hope you find the forum a friendly, informative and supportive place.

    Now that you have found us please have a good look around the site and feel free to ask questions or join in any existing discussions.
     
  19. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    10,033
    Merseyside
    I’ve already replied to your thread. I’ll move it to the right section & you'll find it here.
    https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/concerns-from-the-another-angle.110956/
     
  20. Sujanne

    Sujanne Registered User

    Aug 10, 2018
    10
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