Say hello and introduce yourself

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HarrietD

Staff Member
Staff member
Apr 29, 2014
10,113
0
London
Welcome to Dementia Support Forum :)

However you have been affected by dementia, our community is a place to get support from others.

Say hello

This is our welcome thread - the place many members start. Our volunteers and regular members are here to say hello to you and to welcome you to our community.

This thread is for you to say hello and tell us a little bit about yourself, and your connection to dementia.

Whatever you're facing today, we hope you find our community to be helpful and supportive.

How to use the community

To post a new thread:
  1. Click here to see the list of forums on the homepage. Under 'Support from other members' you'll find a list of different areas of the community. Choose the one which seems most relevant to you or your question.
  2. Click on the yellow button that says 'Post thread'.
  3. Type in a title and then write your message in the text box. Once you've done that, click on the yellow button that says 'Post thread'. Other members will now be able to reply to you :)
Any questions?

If you have any questions, you can email us on DementiaSupportForum@alzheimers.org.uk - we're here to help.
 

99monkeyboy99

New member
Apr 5, 2024
2
0
Hi!

I'm a new member and first time poster.

My Mum aged 84 has just been diagnosed with undertimed dimentia. She had a CT scan today so we're now awaiting the results of that and our recall to the memory clinic to see which type of dementia she has and if she is a candidate for medication.

It's nice to find a place where people 'get it' and can offer help, support, advice or just a friendly ear.

All the best
Tanya x
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
75,841
0
73
Dundee
Welcome to the forum @99monkeyboy99

I'm sorry to hear aout your mum's dementia. I hope that you get the results from the memory clinic soon.

You've certainly come to a place where people 'get it' You'll find understanding, support and always a listening ear here.
 

Kevinl

Registered User
Aug 24, 2013
7,379
0
Salford
Well, hello and welcome first of all, I'm not familiar with the word Untimed, is that early onset by another name. K
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
75,841
0
73
Dundee

Welcome to the forum @GridNorth. I see you’ve deleted this post but have posted elsewhere -


I’m sure you will find lots of understanding and support here.
 

SeaSwallow

Volunteer Moderator
Oct 28, 2019
6,986
0
Hello @carina-maria and welcome to the Dementia Support Forum. You will find lots of help and support here. You might find it useful to start a thread in the I have dementia area and I have attached a link below.
 

Angeldust

Registered User
Apr 7, 2024
14
0
HI my name is Wendy

I am a little lost currently. Boyfriends father has got dimentia. The boyfriend is In Denial and does not believe that it is true. He wants to do brain scans etc. All the signs are there. The father went from shuffle walking to full blown immobility in the space of 1 week. We bathe him change him (diapers) feed him. I ensure that he is kept hydrated, fed, etc.

The problem I'm having is its very difficult for myself to put dad change etc as I'm small and nit exactly young either. We hired a care giver but this person is useless too busy watching TV. But will try again with someone new.

The issue is I have stated to him that he is going to spin out as he still works, our daily lives are non existing. We argue all the time. He doesn't want to put his dad in a frail care home, but would rather have the dad at home. I just feel that if I'm not on His case to watch his dad while I take tome on my own, we land up in an argument because he believes that once he has done he can go play games on the computer or go out and hav3 his hair cut etc which leaves me yet again with no free time at all between having to sort out breakfast lunch supper, snacks medication cleaning house doing washing sorting animals constantly checking if dad is breathing right, body temperature Is right, no fever no swelling of his knee, etc. I'm exhausted this situation has been hounv on for a month since it started a exactly a month ago. I honestly just feel like packing my things and leaving.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
82,698
0
Kent
Welcome to the forum @Angeldust

Have you had medical advice about your boyfriend`s father? His deterioration seems so rapid, I have never heard of this being caused by dementia.

Perhaps a doctor will be able to tell you what is wrong.
 

Angeldust

Registered User
Apr 7, 2024
14
0
Welcome to the forum @Angeldust

Have you had medical advice about your boyfriend`s father? His deterioration seems so rapid, I have never heard of this being caused by dementia.

Perhaps a doctor will be able to tell you what is wrong.
We have been to 3 doctors, the first doctore took bloods all fine did and ekg and the heartbis fine, she put him on meds called memor , one dic was a call out to the house only to find fluid on The knee causing an infection. Was on a 5 day course of anti biotics but by the 3rd day he developed a Hugh fever. Went back saw another doctor who did small memory tests. Like small subtraction Sums and a repeat back of words, which he got wrong. As well as he was asked how many kids he had and instead of saying 2 he was counting his own siblings of 7. The other question the dic asked was where is his wife he started crying and stating she passed away, which is not true. So his brain is all jumbled up.

It's a form of RPD rapid progressive dimentia. With the hugh decline over a month nothing else has changed. Except today was the first time he stated that he is irritated.


He associates me as his nurse ( as I stated to the boyfriend that his dad hadn't bathed In 5 days and his walking went to shuffling ) boyfriend went to work ( he was on a 2 day dayshift and a 2 day nightshift). And In These 4 days I noticed small little things. Like 1 the shuffling on day one as well as repeating himself. Day 2 he was leaning forward whilst shuffling and looking for me i sensed he didn't like being alone. Day 3 he went to bed that night but and wasn't sleeping , I don't sleep much so I asked him if he is OK. He said he was but I kept listening. Early hours of the next morning 4am I heard hom shuffling up and down the passage that's when it all started coming together. He didn't make if to the loo on time. Day 4 was the worst put him to bed after he was taking to me outside stating he wants to marry me and he remembers me from another time. I stated it's time to go shower and this is another sign where he actually allowed me to undress him put him In A shower introduced diapers to him made him as comfortable as possible that there is nothing to be embarrassed about and since then he seems to feel more relaxed around myself.

There is a whole lit more to the story above I've just given the short version.

I have made an appointment with a neurologist for the 15th April.

The thing is how do I explain. Things to the boyfriend. I've tried so hard it's like it goes in his one ear and out the other?

I have told him to be patient and kind , he needs to treat his dad as a small child soothing words juat humor dad if he says things that don't make sense unfortunately at this stage until we can if possible pin Point a problem.

But I'm at a loss now, he'll assist me for 3 hours and then run off to play games etc.
 

zandralapoi

New member
Apr 7, 2024
6
0
Hi there, just joined for a little support. Cared for Mum (90s) for a while who had dementia and sadly she went into a Care Home last year, the relief was amazing. Now her younger sister, my Auntie, has started having memory issues. I along with her step-daughter are helping her but it’s is a challenge.

Reading you aren’t the only one going through this is a massive help!

Thank you!

Xx
 

Angeldust

Registered User
Apr 7, 2024
14
0
It's a struggle..good one day bad the next..I feel like an outsider trying to help..but feel I should step aside as at the end of the day it's the families decision and this heavy weight at the moment is preventing me from leaving the house to see my own mom whom is 66 and has bipolar...I afraid someone hurts or treats Dad like S@#t...and yet i know I need to see my my my own kids as well as my grandchildren..
 

Angeldust

Registered User
Apr 7, 2024
14
0
Hi there, just joined for a little support. Cared for Mum (90s) for a while who had dementia and sadly she went into a Care Home last year, the relief was amazing. Now her younger sister, my Auntie, has started having memory issues. I along with her step-daughter are helping her but it’s is a challenge.

Reading you aren’t the only one going through this is a massive help!

Thank you!

Xx
Shame friend, I know it isn't easy and at times if feels like you have no life at all...nor able to be the you, you once were..but I believe wuth help support and people to talk to it can be a little easier
 
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