Update on my Dad
- Thread starter sue38
- Start date
Hi Sue
Glad your dad had a lovely birthday
Love Julie xx
PS What's wrong with socks-MIL brought me some for Christmas??
Glad your dad had a lovely birthday
Love Julie xx
PS What's wrong with socks-MIL brought me some for Christmas??
I've had a bad cold and so didn't visit my dad last weekend.
This weekend I called at the home on Saturday ... and then my mum arrived ... and then my sister arrived. My mum had brought a CD that my other sister had ordered for his birthday, but had just arrived. It's called 'Songs That Won the War' or something similar. Vera Lynn, Glenn Miller, Flanagan & Allen ... interspersed with speeches from Churchill "We will fight them on the beaches ...' Run Rabbit Run... I can't help feeling war was a far more jolly event. Or perhaps the PR was better ... Anyway we put it on in the lounge and many of the residents were singing away. One of the lady residents was in the WAAF.
I went again yesterday with my nail clippers as I had noticed my dad's nails were a bit long. I also had a G&T, with ice lemon and a proper glass. After the manicure I found some moisturiser in my bag and gave my dad a mini facial which he loved. It turned into quite a pamper day.
My mum arrived and asked if my dad had eaten his lunch (yes) which prompted me to ask if he had been weighed recently. We are aware that his weight is dropping but I was shocked when I was told that he now weighs 49 kg. That's 7.7 stone or 108 pounds. For a man who was always 14/15 stone, 13 stone 18 months and 10 stone 9 months ago - that's a hell of a loss. We are all stunned. He eats well.
We agreed that it might be the dementia, but everything else MUST be ruled out. The GP came today (I wasn't there) but has "given him some tablets to stop the diarrhoea".
I can't help thinking that if I presented at the GP with such a weight loss he would have arranged all sorts of blood tests. I know it might be the dementia, but it might be thyroid, diabetes, cancer, or (according to one website) a result of all the drugs.
Will speak to GP and/or home tomorrow.
This weekend I called at the home on Saturday ... and then my mum arrived ... and then my sister arrived. My mum had brought a CD that my other sister had ordered for his birthday, but had just arrived. It's called 'Songs That Won the War' or something similar. Vera Lynn, Glenn Miller, Flanagan & Allen ... interspersed with speeches from Churchill "We will fight them on the beaches ...' Run Rabbit Run... I can't help feeling war was a far more jolly event. Or perhaps the PR was better ...
Anyway we put it on in the lounge and many of the residents were singing away. One of the lady residents was in the WAAF. I went again yesterday with my nail clippers as I had noticed my dad's nails were a bit long. I also had a G&T, with ice lemon and a proper glass. After the manicure I found some moisturiser in my bag and gave my dad a mini facial which he loved. It turned into quite a pamper day.
My mum arrived and asked if my dad had eaten his lunch (yes) which prompted me to ask if he had been weighed recently. We are aware that his weight is dropping but I was shocked when I was told that he now weighs 49 kg. That's 7.7 stone or 108 pounds.
For a man who was always 14/15 stone, 13 stone 18 months and 10 stone 9 months ago - that's a hell of a loss. We are all stunned. He eats well.We agreed that it might be the dementia, but everything else MUST be ruled out. The GP came today (I wasn't there) but has "given him some tablets to stop the diarrhoea".
I can't help thinking that if I presented at the GP with such a weight loss he would have arranged all sorts of blood tests. I know it might be the dementia, but it might be thyroid, diabetes, cancer, or (according to one website) a result of all the drugs.
Will speak to GP and/or home tomorrow.
Hello Sue:
Whilst it is good to hear about your Dad your report on his weight loss sounds alarming. I always thought your Dad and my David were at a similar stage, but my husband is now 12.5 stones whilst last Christmas he was under 10 stone. I know Quetiapine is giving him an appetite, but sadly for the sweet stuff he adores. If your Dad is 7.7 stone then it calls for attention. (I am considered small at 9.00 stone!!).
I am sure the Home will be keeping an eye on this but its good for you to give them a 'push'. I can imagine you with the nail clippers - I always have David's file in my bag. I do emery boards as I cannot trust myself with scissors and clippers.
Best wishes
Whilst it is good to hear about your Dad your report on his weight loss sounds alarming. I always thought your Dad and my David were at a similar stage, but my husband is now 12.5 stones whilst last Christmas he was under 10 stone. I know Quetiapine is giving him an appetite, but sadly for the sweet stuff he adores. If your Dad is 7.7 stone then it calls for attention. (I am considered small at 9.00 stone!!).
I am sure the Home will be keeping an eye on this but its good for you to give them a 'push'. I can imagine you with the nail clippers - I always have David's file in my bag. I do emery boards as I cannot trust myself with scissors and clippers.
Best wishes
Sue ... 100% agreed ... you may recall with my own ‘battle’ with mum when I was not prepared to have dementia deemed as sole cause of all her problems, weight loss and sundry other symptoms ... and it may not be bad news .... but to this day I am glad I fought for her tests and proper diagnosis .... if it was only to secure her appropriate care .....
Fight them on the beaches? We have to fight them at every reception desk, nursing station and everything else .....
Wishing you and yours and your dad love and best wishes for what you need to do ..... if it is just to rule out anything else – which may be easy – and maybe not ...... take each test as it comes ..... and in the mean time – here’s to G&Ts and manicures ....
Much love, Karen, x
Sue, you are quite right not to visit your dad when you have a cold or feel under par. Apart from protecting your dad, it protects the other residents and the staff too. Hope you are feeling much better.
You say your dad eats well, and it certainly sounds as if he eats OK when you offer him prawns.
Are you able to sit through a mealtime with him and observe how he manages? Do the staff help him eat or leave him to it?I hope you get some satisfaction from the GP/home today.
Sue, that weight loss is very worrying. I hope the GP recommends tests. I know people often lose weight in the final stages (John's still putting it on!), but that rate of loss is surely not normal? I'm surprised the staff haven't queried it before.
I do John's nails and hair too, and massage his hands, I haven't tried a facial, I don't think he'd be thrilled.
I hope you can get some satisfaction from the GP, please let us know.
Love,
I do John's nails and hair too, and massage his hands, I haven't tried a facial, I don't think he'd be thrilled.
I hope you can get some satisfaction from the GP, please let us know.
Love,
Thank you for your replies - I have only just realised that I didn't post back. HOW RUDE! as my friend's 5 year old is fond of saying.
My dad eats well, though not terribly prettily. I have stayed at mealtimes to see how he eats. Mostly his food is in a bowl and he eats with a spoon. As long as he eats that's fine.
The manager of the home (who I rarely see as she works Monday to Friday 8-4 when I can't visit and is someone that I struggle to 'connect with') told me when I mentioned the weight loss "it's the dementia". I found myself correcting her and saying "It MAY be the dementia". The anti-diarrhoea tablets had no effect so they have doubled the dose. I am keeping an eye on the situation and will give it another week.
The manager went on to tell me that they are making some alterations at the home and that she is going to have my dad's room (a downstairs room with a bay window) as her office. I just said "Oh right" while thinking "not whilst there's breath in my body, sweetheart".
The facials with a side order of gin and prawns continue. I am trying Bio-Oil. Not cheap but supposed to help with dehydrated skin. Plus it's not as cold on contact as cream. My dad resists at first but soon gets into it - I think he finds the human contact reassuring. Hazel, you should give it a go.
My dad eats well, though not terribly prettily. I have stayed at mealtimes to see how he eats. Mostly his food is in a bowl and he eats with a spoon. As long as he eats that's fine.
The manager of the home (who I rarely see as she works Monday to Friday 8-4 when I can't visit and is someone that I struggle to 'connect with') told me when I mentioned the weight loss "it's the dementia". I found myself correcting her and saying "It MAY be the dementia". The anti-diarrhoea tablets had no effect so they have doubled the dose. I am keeping an eye on the situation and will give it another week.
The manager went on to tell me that they are making some alterations at the home and that she is going to have my dad's room (a downstairs room with a bay window) as her office. I just said "Oh right" while thinking "not whilst there's breath in my body, sweetheart".
The facials with a side order of gin and prawns continue. I am trying Bio-Oil. Not cheap but supposed to help with dehydrated skin. Plus it's not as cold on contact as cream. My dad resists at first but soon gets into it - I think he finds the human contact reassuring. Hazel, you should give it a go.
I love the thought, Sue, but I do hope your Dad does not have to move his room. (Will he understand? - I know my David would not now!).
So its watch this space - battle commences!! I know who's side I am on
).
Hazel, you should give it a go.
I'll give it a go, Sue!
Well all who know you, Sue, would place bets on you rather than the manager.
OOOH, me too!
We had a call from my dad's CH in the early hours of Tuesday morning to say my dad had the D&V bug that a few of the residents had. Projectile vomiting and he appeared to have had a slight seizure so they had sent him to A&E.
My sister and I got there about 4.30 am and a chest x-ray revealed 'serious pneumonia'.
This could have been as a result of aspirating his food, or the vomit could have got into his lungs.
We agreed a DNR directive with the doctors.
24 hours later my dad is still with us. I can't fault the hospital.
My sister has arrived from Greece and we have stayed with him overnight. Will see what today brings.
My sister and I got there about 4.30 am and a chest x-ray revealed 'serious pneumonia'.
This could have been as a result of aspirating his food, or the vomit could have got into his lungs.
We agreed a DNR directive with the doctors.
24 hours later my dad is still with us. I can't fault the hospital.
My sister has arrived from Greece and we have stayed with him overnight. Will see what today brings.
I'm sorry to hear this news, Sue, what a worry for you all.
Hopefully you'll hear some better news today. Keep us posted.
Love xx
Hopefully you'll hear some better news today. Keep us posted.
Love xx
Oh dear Sue - I am sorry. Please keep in touch - good that your Mum has you and your sister to support her.
Love
Love
Dear Sue
Just wanted to say I am thinking of you- hope today sees an improvement in your dad?
Love Julie xx
Just wanted to say I am thinking of you- hope today sees an improvement in your dad?
Love Julie xx
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