Went for a chat with some friends yesterday on my own!. Of course the conversation came round to me and they asked why I didn’t just stand up to my wife and insist on things when she is determined about something. Like, I’m not taking you there or do it this way or this is where we’re going. They question wouldn’t it be easier to be firmer instead of giving in.
Well, we know the answer don’t we. My wife will keep on and on, getting more and more frustrated till she throws something, or tries the neighbours for a lift. Reasoning is useless as is arguing, you just end up more and more angry which affects you only.....she’s oblivious to it all. Live in their world I’m told, it’s easier. And why would others not see how it all works. Until you are living and breathing dementia it’s easy to believe there are solutions. I’m currently sharing the sofa with her as she sleeps ( 13.30) because it’s calm and I grab these moments where I can.
I’m contacted by sitters who have tried once and want to try again. Great if only it was that simple. OH doesn’t like most people who are strangers and who can blame her. I wouldn’t like it. But I’m obligated to do it because if I cancel they’ll think I don’t need others. Catch 22.