Morning Dave,
I agree with what others have said, please give outside help a try...
I know I've expressed my negative thoughts on SS/SW, but they are not all the same.
The best help I found, after several years, came from Age Concern (now Age UK), who provided a sitter (male). He would come for appx 2 hours every other week.
The plan was, they would go out for a little drive / coffee, shopping ...
The service was free, but I paid for coffees etc.
When my husbands behaviour got too difficult to manage
, my sitter still came, but they did not go out.
The sitter liked J (and me ), and said he would still come and I could use the time to go out myself.
It was the Psychologist that told us about the Age Concern service, not SW.
Psychologist was cross with SW for not telling me. She also said the GP can make referrals.
I/we also used Crossroads as a sitting service. They were very good. This was a sitting service only.
I had to pay for this (no SS involvement), and used them on the opposite weeks I used Age Concern.
It meant I had 2/3 hours off from caring every week,
I'd go out, but even though I knew J was in good hands, I never could relax or stop worrying.... ever !!
You know what it its like, your head always thinking of someone else and not yourself.
Crossroads will also take people out shopping, day trips, hair cuts. Its up to you to tell them what kind of service your would like.
Have you joined your local Carers Association ?
They will be able to tell you what help is available to you, and I think you will find it less 'invasive' than SS....