Morning all,
Early start here, not had a good nights sleep at all, and suspect I'll be feeling that later! A combination of aching joints, stressing a bit over the school situation for youngest and being very tense after another pretty awful day with Mil - I was very grateful for the thought of the Bizarrite Cheerleaders, shouting support in the background
x
IzzyJ - will be thinking of you today, and wishing you lots of strength. I hope today goes as well as this sort of day can, and that it brings you and all your friends and family some comfort xxxxx
Slugsta, so glad you Mum's birthday bash went well
Happy belated birthday to your Mum, lovely to read that she had such a nice day - hope you are not too exhausted, though xxxx
Mil was clearly in a bit of a tizz when she woke at around 9.30. I very determindly kept a smile glued in place and tried to be upbeat and cheery, but she was determined to have the grumps. Back aching, tummy aching, head aching, she supposed it would be too much trouble for me to give her a bite of toast and a wee cup of tea, she had forgotten to bring clothes with her (she said) so kept apologising for being in her dressing gown (must have reassured her on that one at least 20 times whilst she ate). After breakfast, when I fetched her meds, I told her I'd added painkillers, to help with her aches and pains - no thank you, just a very suspicious 'Why are YOU being so nice to me?'. She decided to tootle off back to bed for a couple of hours, which was obviously fine - and which gave me the last slice of peace for the rest of the day.
She was down again , just after 11, wanted to get dressed, wringing her hands and asking to borrow clothes as she didn't '
have so much as a bra with me, Ann'. Went up with her, showed her it was OK, that she had lots of clothes and asked her to go into the bathroom and start getting undressed whilst I put away some stuff I'd ironed for her, saying that as her shoulder and back were aching, I'd come and give her a 'hand' - 2 or 3 minutes later, I went in to find her with PJ top off, but bottoms and pull ups still on, stood by the sink - with the cleaning cloth from the cupboard under the sink being used as a flannel as she tried to wash her face and under her arms with cold water and no soap. I explained that she had 'accidently' picked up a flannel that needed washing (first thing I could think of), started to fill the sink with hot water and asked her to undress. Nope. She had just washed. I had just seen her. She didn't need me to do anything and she was going to get dressed. Nope - didn't need to change her 'knickers', she insisted she did that before I got in the bathroom. Apart from the fact that she was rather whiffy with sweat after her agitation of the night before, I really wanted to make sure that she washed properly especially over where she had washed with the cleaning cloth - I had rinsed it after I'd used it, but even so, I use bleach and disinfectant and I was a bit worried about it possibly harming her delicate skin if any residue was still on the cloth
It took me about 10 minutes to persaude her to wash her top half with warm water and soap, but a lot longer to get her to wash her bottom half - in dire need of it as she had (as usual) not bothered with using loo paper - and when she finally agreed, it was to the accompaniment of me being called a pervert, sick, etc,etc. I did tell her very firmly that she was being rude, eventually, and she did stop, but even so, it took over and hour to get her washed and dressed.
She came down, I was making youngest something to eat before she headed off to Joseph rehearsals, Mil announced she was 'starving, hadn't had a thing to eat for 'hours''', so after offering her egg on toast, sausage and egg, sausage toasties and soup, she refused all and finally decided she only wanted a 'ham butty'. As she sat at the table she started on about going 'home'. I told her that there was no point talking about that 'now', as it was Sunday, there were no buses and I didn't have the car as OH had taken it to work. Had a 5 minute rant about how selfish OH was (because he knew that she was planning on going home today, she said, and had promised to leave the car!) and then she was up, checking her purse, not finding any money in it and insisting that she wanted back the £5 she 'lent' me last week so she could get a taxi. Told her I had no cash on me, she ranted about that, sayng that she thought I was lying and I would do anything to 'make her life a misery'. I made her another cuppa, stuck firmly to a smile and that I was sorry she felt like that, said how about she had some tea and watched TV for a bit.
Initially she settled for about 20 minutes with the 'magic' monkey programme, but then the getting up and down started - she was looking for the little girl she had brought with her. She was only 2 or 3, her mother would 'kill' Mil if she had lost her, she was just going to look in the kithen for her. We now have a barrier across the kitchen entrance, rather than a gate (which is an absolute pain when I have to go in and out, but so far is proving very sturdy) and she was really cross that I wouldn't take it down - my kitchen isn't big, no 'corners' for anyone to hide in, clear to see there was no one in it - but Mil still wanted in there to 'check the cupboards'. When she realised she wasn't getting in there, she wanted to go outside to look - but didn't want me to come with her, she could manage the steps by herself, she insisted - only we know she can't, so in the end, I locked the patio doors when she wasn't looking and pocketed the key, then walked away from her ranting.
Up the stairs she went, and I could hear her rattling and knocking at the other bedroom doors up there, and left her to get on with it. Back down, she sat on the sofa and every two minutes was calling to me to ask had I seen the 'little one'? Did I know where the 'little girl was'. She had to go home to give the little one back to her Mum, would I not tell her where she was? I couldn't be so heartless as to upset the childs mother like that, could I?. Saw youngest off at the door for her lift to rehearsals, came back to find Mil at the kitchen barrier, trying to kick at it to break it down. Not only was the 'child' in there, but Mil was adamant she had a 'pot of peas' that would burn if she didn't get in to see to them.
And that was what it was like for the whole of the rest of the day. Mil barely stopped begging and pleading for me to help her find this littlle girl (who varied in age from 2 to 10, throughout the day, and who was either called 'Jenny' or 'Sarah' or Mil couldn't remember her name and who was a niece, a neighbours child or 'My Aunties little one'). She was back and to to the kitchen and patio doors, banging and pulling at the barrier, banging on the glass, up the stairs (banging on the front door and shouting for help on the way), trying to kick at the bedroom doors to open them, banging on her bedroom window, emptying her PJ's from the drawers and carrying them round with her saying she was taking them and the little girl home. If I left her alone in the living room, she would start to pull cushions off sofa's 'looking for my key to get out' and then she started on pulling the DVD's off the TV cabinet and the books off the little bookcase unit by where I sit - she said OH had told her that there was a spare key hidden there, in case she ever needed it to get away from me! I tried every flipping distraction i could think of, I tried being firm but nice telling her that if she didn't sit down and calm down I would send her to her room - she would promise she would be 'quiet now', but then 10 seconds later would say something like did I have an umbrella she could use so the child wouldn't get soaked when Mil took her home? Or 'What time is it? That late? I'd better call the wee girl in and get her ready to go'. By the time youngest got home, at 5.30., I'd given up on the idea of the usual roast as I all I had managed to do was chop some cabbage, and decided on a pasta salad for us two, and a ready meal (with the cabbage) for Mil. It would have taken me less than 10 minutes to get all that prepared and the cooking started, but in total, I had to leave the kitchen 11 times during that 10 minutes, to stop Mil either pulling books or DVD's off shelves, banging on the front door or banging at the patio doors. I gave up - she had spent so much time being sent to her room the day before, I wanted to avoid it yesterday, but at that point I caved, and she was sent upstairs - just so I could prepare the flipping meal for everyone. I got the pasta on, the ready meal in the oven and started the cabbage cooking, but the whole time I was up and down the stairs as Mil used framed pictures from her room, her TV remote and also her slippers to hammer on the upstairs doors, shouting 'Are you in there?'. I'd already unlocked the doors 2 or 3 times to show her that there was no child in any of the rooms, but still she kept on. The pup got very wound up at all the banging and her shouting, and he started barking for Britain (the neighbours must have loved us!) which added to the general mayham and my now thumping head.
Tea - poor effort as it was - brought us about 30 minutes peace, and then she was off again. I refused to let her come down, just no point and I seriously was in dire need of even just the 5 or 10 minute's quiet in between her trying to come downstairs repeatedly or her starting to bang at the bedroom doors again (and setting the pup off). She finally seemed to run out of steam at about 8pm, after she changed into her PJ's - thank God. We got an hours peace before OH came home. He called her down for meds and porridge - I flatly refused to have anything to do with her - during which it was clear she had no idea he was her son, and she was trying to flirt with him, and asking him to 'walk me back to my room' when she finished eating
OH sent her back up to bed with a flea in her ear, and she actually settled.
In amongst the list of 'to do's' for today, I am going to have to try and pick up a new supply of sample bottles - I don't think she has a UTI, but if today is anything like the last 2 days, then its obviously worth me getting that checked out. But, my main issue today is dealing with the school for youngest - I'm afraid Mil and her doings will have to take a back seat to that!
Hope you guys all manage to have a good day xxxx
