Please don't throw me away, breaking my promise
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Same here, without the dog. GxxxxxI don't think I will see the sea till I'm on my own either, haven't been away for nearly 3 years, taking OH and the dog plus the luggage on the train doesn't bare thinking about.. Lx
Widely spread but only a thought awayWho knows - maybe one day we could arrange to meet up somewhere we could all reach. We are so widely spread but you never know!!
Yesterday a daughter came, I had a really bad headache so she walked with her Dad up the village hall, she saw how even the walker was difficult to use these days. She said it was walking him. I hope the pressure is off me a bit to do this that and t'other, so much advice to get out and go places. Now seen firsthand,
He reckoned he could walk better if he swung his arms, I cannot remember him ever noticeably swinging his arms. A memory from National Service perhaps?
Same for me too, the nearest sea I have had lately was watching the scenery in Poldark, far more satisfying than the characters. A DVD of that, a fan on my face and a spray of salt water will have to do!
But we used to swing arms didn't we. Bit like nordic walking without the stick things. I so hate advice to get out and go places ... Once had social worker came and she kept saying things likeYesterday a daughter came, I had a really bad headache so she walked with her Dad up the village hall, she saw how even the walker was difficult to use these days. She said it was walking him. I hope the pressure is off me a bit to do this that and t'other, so much advice to get out and go places. Now seen firsthand,
He reckoned he could walk better if he swung his arms, I cannot remember him ever noticeably swinging his arms. A memory from National Service perhaps?
If you had a car you could take him to .... but you don't have a car.
If you could get him in a coach you could go to ... but he can't walk.
Really so bloody useful. Gxxxx
I don’t worry about expecting him to be active and do this or that any more in spite of what anyone may say. I take him out when he wants to go and he can do short walks, especially if the pub is involved, but from being an active man with lots of interest he has become a man who sits in his chair doing nothing, sighing and dozing, or going up to his bed. His only interests in life now are lying on his bed, or looking at his iPad, and wanting to drink alcohol which is bad for him. He has a radio but never listens to it, can’t operate the TV. Pretty miserable existence I suppose when you write it down but I do enough as it is and it gets worse all the time. I am not complaining because that’s just how it is and we all do the best we can whatever that may be.
You've said it exactly right - "we all do the best we can". We didn't know this was coming, we are not trained, not experts and we get things wrong sometimes (and then frequently beat ourselves up for good measure). But we do our best and that is all anyone can do. Thanks @Grahamstown xx
I know, sweetheart, I do understand, thank you. Keith was an incredibly active man and he lost this and all skills so very quickly. It seems a miserable existence to us, but I wonder how they experience it. I think you are doing so so well. With love and thank you, Geraldinexx
Yes, thank you all. Once I used to said the only day he sat down and relaxed was Christmas Day.
I have accepted the situation and quiet gentle days suit. He cannot be left, I do not mind that although I wonder whether I will lose my ability to go out on my own! Probably not, there have been other times when I have been tied to the home.
It is strange though, to see someone once so involved, sleeping a lot, idly watching instead of always doing.
Skills taken for granted have faded away,
It reminds me of be careful what you wish for! There could well be a time when this will be a golden age when looking back, always a foolish thing to do! At least no care home fees. Never understand where that money comes from, our Council is virtually bankrupt. Enjoy the rest of Sunday. I am before the builder starts work tomorrow.
I have accepted the situation and quiet gentle days suit. He cannot be left, I do not mind that although I wonder whether I will lose my ability to go out on my own! Probably not, there have been other times when I have been tied to the home.
It is strange though, to see someone once so involved, sleeping a lot, idly watching instead of always doing.
Skills taken for granted have faded away,
It reminds me of be careful what you wish for! There could well be a time when this will be a golden age when looking back, always a foolish thing to do! At least no care home fees. Never understand where that money comes from, our Council is virtually bankrupt. Enjoy the rest of Sunday. I am before the builder starts work tomorrow.
Oh lovely to hear from you. Our council pretty bad, too. No public loos, most libraries closed etc etc. Yes, I know, it could be a golden age. What you said reminded me of an article I read about three years ago by an anthropologist working with the senior dementia research unit in the States. She said that they had so far come up with no explanation for the disease but privately scientists believe that it is simply a case of some brains wear out faster than others. I wonder if our loved ones wore themselves out by their activity!! Gxxxx
I read all your posts, and most of them bring me so much comfort, thank you. Although I have to be honest, some upset me, and some frighten me for what the future holds. But all are valuable to me.
I have little to contribute to TP as my life is very very mundane. I look after my husband every waking moment, don’t go anywhere except hospitals and Sainsbury’s! I don’t even have a dog!! I used to be a happy bubbly person... where has that gone?!
So, I thought I would try to bring a smile....
When my husband was having his latest test at the memory clinic they asked him to say as many words beginning with P as he could. No names, no animals. He sat for a while, a pained (that was a P he could have had) expression on his face. Triumphantly he came up with one word....
Patricia. The name of his first wife more than 50 years ago!
I had to laugh xx
I have little to contribute to TP as my life is very very mundane. I look after my husband every waking moment, don’t go anywhere except hospitals and Sainsbury’s! I don’t even have a dog!! I used to be a happy bubbly person... where has that gone?!
So, I thought I would try to bring a smile....
When my husband was having his latest test at the memory clinic they asked him to say as many words beginning with P as he could. No names, no animals. He sat for a while, a pained (that was a P he could have had) expression on his face. Triumphantly he came up with one word....
Patricia. The name of his first wife more than 50 years ago!
I had to laugh xx
You made me smile. A son said of his mother, she was very clever and talented she just used up her cleverness. Xxx sleep well
Hi @Sad Staffs - oh yes, the 'things beginning with' in the memory test. My Mum's letter was 'B' and a more random lot of words you could not have produced if you tried, she WAS allowed animals, and she beautifully annunciated 'BISON'?!? I'm afraid I snorted with laughter when she came out with that one.
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Thank you all so very much for your beautiful posts on this thread. Well, here I am again! Keith was mostly asleep when I got there as this was after lunch. However, he did manage to eat his way through two slices of cake and drink a cup of tea while appearing to be slumbering deeply.
AND then a mystery. I had a request to do Rawhide again in the main lounge so this I did, using someone's dressing gown drawstring as a whip. And a couple of residents applauded, which was kind and at least no one said they preferred classical music. But then when I affirmed one of the residents who applauded and asked them what they liked about the song, which bit, they said AMERICAN HARD GUMS.
No, I have no idea either. Nor have the nurses, but there had been a conversation about sweets and jelly babies earlier ... ???? Answers on a postcard guys! Love and best, Geraldine aka kindred.xxxxx
AND then a mystery. I had a request to do Rawhide again in the main lounge so this I did, using someone's dressing gown drawstring as a whip. And a couple of residents applauded, which was kind and at least no one said they preferred classical music. But then when I affirmed one of the residents who applauded and asked them what they liked about the song, which bit, they said AMERICAN HARD GUMS.
No, I have no idea either. Nor have the nurses, but there had been a conversation about sweets and jelly babies earlier ... ???? Answers on a postcard guys! Love and best, Geraldine aka kindred.xxxxx
Sometimes mundane is good! Quiet uneventful days are soothing. I seldom go out, I shop on line too. The medical trips are a change of scenery! Who would have thought that! It is good to hear that others live similar lives, partly because other people sometimes suggest I should do more. Perhaps we can share even the mundane!
I would have loved to have seen and heard you! It make me chuckle.
Hope you get a answer!