1. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Now I understand how destructive an infection can be. Things are much calmer today and mum has only one more antibiotic to take. No results from urine sample yet, its the weekend, but whatever it was seems to have past.
     
  2. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    "Can I help you with that?" One of the few questions mum asks especially when she sees me doing some household chores. Today I was carrying a small pile of laundry to the machine and when mum asked me I said yes please and her answer was, I'm not doing that! Instead all she seems to want to do is pick up the tiniest pieces of something from the floor. Someone told me this is called 'cotton pickin'. The thing is I cannot see the stuff that she is picking up, but she always hands me the fluff or I find little balls of the stuff on the furniture. She can definitely make a mess for me to clear.
     
  3. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Oh dear, had to make another change this week. Decided last weekend that I could no longer let mum wander to and from garden gate. She is becoming so unstable and has had 2 falls, both on the soft lawn, but it would only be a matter of time before she hits the hard ground. Plus the back and forth seems to increase her anxiety and honestly after an afternoon of this she is out of breath and in some pain. So last couple of days after our mornings out shopping etc, once I have put the rubbish out and tidied the garden a little by the afternoon the front door is locked. She is a little anxious pottering around the house, but at least every now and then she sits down. What else can I do! Have to protect her from herself.
     
  4. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Secretly I do wish mum would stop moving pieces of furniture around, but I know this will never happen so have to put up with it, hard though especially when I find dining chairs in bathroom and bath towels draped over armchair as a protector. Some pieces only get moved a few inches each time and most of the time I never see her doing this, it is like living with a poltergeist. Entered her bedroom this morning to find that she had taken clothes out of her wardrobe and tried to put commode in there, thankfully it was empty, a few weeks ago because of all this night time movement I decided to empty commode whenever it is used, whatever time it is.
     
  5. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Something not quite right with mum. Gp appointment all wrong, could not get mum into the car, by the time we did get there surgery was already closed for its afternoon training session. All I could get was a couple of pots for stool sample, but none of this can be dealt with till next week, I have to ring surgery first thing Monday morning for a cancelation or to see emergency on duty doctor.

    I think she still has some form of infection, which I would like to rule out before I accept that it is the dementia moving on. Bowel movements are a problem again and today she has been very sleepy, Every night this week she has gone to bed early and as far as I can tell, has slept through till 7.30 a.m., although I have had to wake her around midnight to use the commode and in the morning I notice one or two ornaments and things have moved, but not much. After years of broken nights I am finding this new sleep pattern a bit disconcerting. For the rest of the time her behaviour is about the same, she is still moving things around the house, still obsessing about the dog and the car, but her energy levels and appetite are low and eating a meal seems to be confusing her, so she is now using only a spoon.

    If things are the same tomorrow and if we have such a service, I will call out emergency cover gp.
     
  6. HillyBilly

    HillyBilly Registered User

    Dec 21, 2015
    1,948
    Ireland
    I wonder if it could "simply" be that with the nights drawing in and change in the weather - autumnal - your Mum is going into hibernation mode? That's what I call it - I do it myself!
    Hugs Tin, hope you don't need to call an emergency doctor but of course you'll do what you have to in your Mum's best interests and for your own peace of mind x
     
  7. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    I did think it might be this, but dismissed it because she did not 'change' last year, but then that was last year. I can pinpoint the time all this started, it was 3rd September and early in the morning I heard her wandering around her room and saying how cold she was, so I got up and turned the heating on, but she would not go back to bed and since then all these changes have stayed with us. Did think she had caught what we used to call a chill. The non specific infection has worried me and of course the bowel movements, last weekend I did think she had developed some lactose intolerance and so cut out all diary.

    Heating has been on for a few weeks and most afternoons I am lighting the fire. I think what I have here is a mixture of some infection not cleared by last antibiotics and the dementia moving on - bad timing.

    Mum's deterioration has been slow, but with some very difficult times. This, if it is deterioration, has been quick. with lots of noticeable changes.
     
  8. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Mum and I just watched The Poseidon Adventure, well only me really. This was one of a handful of films that mum and I went to see together in the 70's, loads of films as a family when I was a child, but this was the first as a fully grown adult. I was home for a weekend and at short notice we decided to make an evening of it, so film then a pub which was another first, mum and me in a pub together! I remember this night so well because mum thoroughly enjoyed the film and for ages after could not stop talking about it. Sad we sit here and she has no recollection of that night or the film. Still I did enjoy seeing it again.
     
  9. Lavender45

    Lavender45 Registered User

    Jun 7, 2015
    1,598
    Liverpool
    Bless your mum, it's such a shame this illness robs everything from our loved ones and by default so much from us.

    That film terrifies me even now, no idea why, there are many scarier films yet it does. X
     
  10. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Think it might have something to do with a sinking ship, plus fire. Although it could be some of the acting - not the best! A bit over the top from some of them.
     
  11. Essie

    Essie Registered User

    Feb 11, 2015
    566
    Oh Tin that did make me laugh!

    I'm so sorry to hear of the continuing problems that your Mum is having and I do agree that it sounds like there is still an infection of some sort present or at least still having an effect - I'm sure I've read on here that an infection can have an effect on PWD for some weeks after it has been treated so Mum may well test as clear and actually be clear but still be suffering.

    Sorry that's not more positive but if it is only the ongoing effects of infection that at least would mean it's not a deterioration in her dementia.
     
  12. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Essie, lingering effects of an infection is good to know - thank you for that information.
     
  13. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Mum all back to normal now, or seems to be if dementia is anything to go by, but we do now have a question whether or not she has bowel cancer and at the moment I am considering if this should be investigated.

    So back to today, for want of a more accurate word mum has been very stubborn especially in the bathroom, she will not cooperate. And so the result is that she is presently wandering around the house with the oddest mixture of clothes on, but no trousers and what I think by now is a very wet pair of pull ups, all the time mumbling to herself. Soon I will have to get out the scissors and quickly cut pull ups off or just rip them at the sides.

    In the car this morning she started undoing her seat belt and sitting on the edge of the seat with her hands holding tight to my head rest something she has not done for over a year. and so a 10 minute journey to get home took over half hour because I had to keep stopping and fasten her back in. Have to sort this, but I think she has started to do it so she can touch her dog. Now the dog has to be secured with a lead that has a seat belt fix I may start to put her on front passenger seat.
     
  14. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Having a right royal battle with mum, cannot get her to let me take her trousers down to change pads, cannot even get her to sit on commode or toilet when I do manage to get trousers down. As I am pulling down she is holding tight and pulling up. At this rate I am going to be searching for a stand up toilet! Only been happening for 3 days but the behaviour has already become ingrained.

    Getting her ready for bed tonight was difficult so I just concentrated on getting two filler pads in pull ups and hope that she does not need the toilet through the night.
     
  15. Amy in the US

    Amy in the US Registered User

    Feb 28, 2015
    4,624
    USA
    Tin, I'm no expert, but when you're trying to toilet your mum or change clothes, could you give her something else to hold onto with both hands, perhaps? Mum, please will you help me, I need you to help me, please hold this? Maybe a towel she can really grip or a soft toy or similar? Sorry if that's a rubbish idea and hope someone here will have advice for you.

    Cancer seems like a cruel thing for the universe to inflict on top of dementia. I'm so sorry it's even a possibility.
     
  16. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Sorry Amy, only just found your post, still trying to navigate myself around this new website.

    I have tried to get her to hold something else while I deal with her trousers, but as soon as I start to pull down she immediately drops anything from her hands. I think that she seems to know what I want her to do next and that is sit down, something she does not want to do all the time. because of possible backache.
     
  17. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    7,935
    Yorkshire
    just wondering, if your mum is bothered by backache, would you have a chance to give her a couple of paracetomol half an hour before you want to get ready for bed, and some other times, so it's not so painful - obviously no good for when immediate attention is required
     
  18. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    I am so sorry that my replies are coming days after someone has posted. Have to work out what I am doing wrong.

    Hi Shedrech I have been giving mum pain killers since Saturday. I have now moved the commode into bathroom during the day, seems to be easier for her, 50 per cent of the time she is still refusing to sit down so I have now become adept with changing and cleaning her while standing.
     
  19. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Poor mum, today has not been great for her, massive sundowning this afternoon and I finally got her to sit down around 6 p.m and she immediately fell asleep, decided to put her to bed around 7, but it was so difficult to get her ready, she was so tired, so I just put her in bed. Woke her at 10 to put proper night time pants and pads on, unfortunately did not get them on in time so had a floor to mop and dry.

    The build up to this tiredness has been a couple of broken nights sleep, I have heard her pottering around in her room every night from midnight to 4ish and today the prolapse was causing a lot of pain for her, gp appointment tomorrow morning initially for meds review but will discuss the prolapse.

    For me, when she is this tired it is always difficult to get her to do simple things like undress, wash hands, even getting her to walk the short distance to her bedroom and it is such a struggle to put incontinence pants on. I have been in touch with continence clinic requesting a change to pads. Seems this was going to happen in the near future anyway, pull up pants are no longer available so the next 3 month supply due for delivery mid November would have been our last, I am hoping to get prescription changed to pads before then.
     
  20. HillyBilly

    HillyBilly Registered User

    Dec 21, 2015
    1,948
    Ireland
    I gave in and changed over to pads from pants Tin. Can you/your Mum afford to buy them yourselves before the prescription changeover? It would make life easier for you.
    Is your Mum on any sleeping pill prescription or paracetamol before bed time, I'm sorry , I can't recall if you've already tried this.
    Plus the "usual" stuff - electric blanket, hot water bottle, aromatherapy oils, Horlicks before bed...
     

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