1. Expert Q&A: Benefits - Weds 23 October, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of benefits. It will be hosted by Lauren from our Knowledge Services team. She'll be answering your questions on Wednesday 23 October between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

  1. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Mum has been thanking god all day!

    Ask her if she would like a cup of tea- Thank god for that. It's raining mum- thank god for that. Time to go to the toilet- thank god for that and so on to every thing I ask or tell her. "Thank God for that"
     
  2. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Another Non stop chatter box day. Only managed to escape it twice and first time not that great, had to turn car radio right up to number 11 ! but she just raised her voice. Second attempt more successful, friend came over for coffee and we sneaked out into the garden for a short time, could still hear mum though, standing at the door calling my name!

    She has also managed to break a kitchen chair, official, she is a human wreaking ball.
     
  3. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Slowly dawning on me that mum cannot tell the difference between a photograph of a dog and the real thing. Last week I bought a very large book of dogs, since then and every afternoon this book gets put on various chairs, today it was put in the cat basket and mum is now talking to it.

    All very sad.
     
  4. Lavender45

    Lavender45 Registered User

    Jun 7, 2015
    1,598
    Liverpool
    It's hard when you realise something else has gone isn't it. Mum's new social worker met her yesterday and asked her who I was, mum said that's Tracey. We have no Tracey in the family and to my reasonable knowledge she's never had a friend called Tracey. Like you it brought me up short a bit. X
     
  5. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Its the little things, stuff that cause no extra work for me, that do upset me more. Not the physical stuff when I have to help her more, I just get on with all that. Actually had a clue about the pictures of pets being real to mum, a few months ago I placed a cat food sachet in the sink cat picture upwards, mum thought the cat was real and sitting in the sink and then this big dog breed book comes into the house, its a great book for her to look through but sadly her perception of the photographs have changed. Strange though because she still sees the soft dog toy as just that.
     
  6. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    A p.s Lavender, I also got a book full of photographs and paintings of warships, I hope she does not think these are real and actually in the house!
     
  7. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Mum's room was a bit of a mess this morning, still is as I have not yet put things back in place, only made the bed, but to do this had to remove all the books and photo frames she had put under the duvet. Had some dried Lavender in there that she spread out over the bed, vacuum cleaner smells nice now! Pieces of furniture moved and a few drawers emptied but not all, have something new to try to stop mum emptying all. I have placed brown paper on top of contents, but ran out so could only do a few and these are the ones that mum did not empty, I think the brown paper gives her the impression that the drawer is empty. At least she has stopped coming in to my bedroom now I have a lock on door, but also I no longer leave a light on in hall, but she has night lights in her bedroom, so darkness in hall stops her coming to my door.

    With all the stuff on top and under her duvet I don't think she slept much last night, so I am hoping that tonight sleep will be achieved without any medication aid. I have been given a tip that motion/travel sickness pills will aid sleep. First thing tomorrow going to chemist. All of her activity last night did not disturb me that much I just occasionally heard something, but she did not leave her room so all fine.
     
  8. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Just had a scary half hour with mum, she was very tired this morning and so we came home earlier than usual, falling asleep in the café. Got home and she fell asleep while I made some phone calls, 2 hours later and I could not wake her. Sleepy yesterday morning too. Think this is down to early rising, 4.30 or 5 a.m both mornings and since I changed everything round, I am sleeping through a lot of this, but if mum gets up she is just not able to put herself back to bed. So crossing everything that this is the only reason for such sleepiness, but it was really hard to wake her and I even had a panic moment and rang gp surgery. She is now wide awake playing with her cards, just had a late lunch.
     
  9. Essie

    Essie Registered User

    Feb 11, 2015
    566
    Oh Tin, that must have been horrible. Hope you both had a reasonable afternoon and that your Mum has a peaceful night to catch up on her rest a bit. Your inventiveness when sorting out any challenges is always impressive, the brown paper in the drawers is genius!
     
  10. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Thanks Essie, the brown paper is working and is now in all but one small drawer that only has her scarves in, these are brought out and spread around her room or shoulders whenever she is awake. Keeping the hallway light off has stopped her from coming to my bedroom, but the downside to this is that I now do not know if she is sleeping through the night or not, because I am fast asleep! but I know she is staying in her room.

    She has been very sleepy all day and once more this afternoon I found it hard to wake her and then get her to stand up. So it may be just a few sleepless nights or the dementia moving on. I am going to make gp appointment to check for any infections, her prolapse is huge and shelf pessary has not solved the problem so I am worried about infection, changing her pads regularly.
     
  11. Essie

    Essie Registered User

    Feb 11, 2015
    566
    Oh gosh, the prolapse sounds awful, your poor Mum. Infection could well account for the over sleepiness if it isn't just lack of sleep. So often dealing with just the dementia seems too much but then something else is added into the mix and you think, oh can we go back to just the dementia! :eek: Fingers crossed the GP visit goes well and is productive.
     
  12. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    I know Essie, you are so right, can we just go back to dealing with Dementia. Have to wait for appointment so taking a sample in tomorrow, hopefully prescription can be sorted and infection dealt with before the appointment.
     
  13. Mamdougan914

    Mamdougan914 Registered User

    Sep 4, 2017
    6
    I'm having the same problem, my dad lives with me and my husband, my younger brother helps and visits, thankfully he's taking dad for a week so we can go on holiday, but my elder brother doesn't bother, I've spoken to his wife and she's says he doesn't like seeing dad like that, like my brother and I are having fun with it!!! But the one dad talks about and wants to see is him. I think dad knows he's not coming to visit that's on his mind I think dad's upset he doesn't visit which breaks my heart and makes me very angry.
     
  14. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Gp appointment late yesterday, managed to wake mum and get her down there on time, but she quickly fell asleep in waiting room. She has a high temperature and a non specific infection so has been prescribed broad spectrum anti biotic [look at me, really getting the medical lingo!] Still have not been able to get a urine sample, proving to be very difficult especially as mum now wears incontenence products all the time and when I do manage to get her on to the commode, nothing! Gp did give me a tip and that was to place cotton wool in her pants and if any urine then this can be trapped in cotton wool and then 'squeezed' out into sample container-hope that last bit makes sense to you all.
    All of this compounded though because I cannot get her to drink much and appetite is low, oh and she is now constipated!
     
  15. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Mum has been all kinds of difficult today and I still have not got a urine sample, its impossible, she will not sit on the commode for more than a few seconds then she is up and off, I am chasing her around to pull up pants and trousers! Gp tip with cotton wool not yet worked, so will have to break her night time sleep to use commode, but will be difficult.

    She took a 2 hour nap this afternoon and was a bit difficult to wake her, but once up she did not stop talking, moving and adjusting everything. Like Essie has posted, missing just normal dementia!
     
  16. Essie

    Essie Registered User

    Feb 11, 2015
    566
    Oh Tin.....:( At least Mum now has the AB's and although not specific hopefully they will do the job and clear the infection, and they should start to calm things down within 24 hours or so, so hopefully tomorrow will be a bit better for both of you.

    It's awful when you can't get someone to take sufficient fluids/food, and the constipation as well....... hopefully tomorrow when the AB's start to take effect your Mum will at least be able to drink a bit more and maybe have a bit of appetite in a day or two.

    Sending good wishes for both of you.
     
  17. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    All change today, hopefully for the better. Managed to get urine sample around midnight and got it to surgery before 9a.m. Appetite back, fussy but back and finally a decent bowel movement early this morning. Last day of antibiotics so hopefully tests will be clear and we can get back to a normal dementia world!
     
  18. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Having a really hard time trying to clean mum after a bowel movement and today there have been a lot, she is fighting me all the way. I am trying to pull her trousers and pants down while she is desperate to keep them up and when I do eventually succeed, she will not stand still for me to clean her, keeps heading for the door. Refuses absolutely to sit on the toilet or commode.

    Really hope this is the end of bowel movements for today, would love to put her to bed all clean.
     
  19. Essie

    Essie Registered User

    Feb 11, 2015
    566
    Well at least she is having bowel movements again and has an appetite too, all good, positive improvements even if she is proving to be a bit too light on her feet.....:) Bless her she's got spirit! You are doing a great job as usual Tin, hopefully you are nearly out of this blip and can, as you say, get back to normal Dementia world... :eek:
     
  20. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Don't have many moments, if any, of comparing my mum's behaviour to a child, but today a naughty toddler comes to mind!
     

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