I am at breakdown today
- Thread starter Helen33
- Start date
Barb
We all know the turmoil you are going through right now, I'm sure Helen will be touched that you are thinking of her despite your own sadness.
Love 'n hugs
We all know the turmoil you are going through right now, I'm sure Helen will be touched that you are thinking of her despite your own sadness.
Love 'n hugs
I see TP as a community centre and you offering a kind word Barb is wonderful - thank you
It's like being in a room and you just come up to me and touch my shoulder and then walk off to deal with all your own pain in your own situation. It really is quite wonderful!!
I SLEPT UNTIL 11am
When I got to bed Alan started whistling and chuntering again and I was so desperately worried that he would work himself up into the frenzy of the previous night I gave him 2 paracetamol for just in case he got a temperature and then he slept. I only woke once to find Alan downstairs in the living room eating an apple and he seemed wide awake. This was about 4am. I brought him back to bed and he said he was cold. I got him warm and then we both slept again until gone 11am I feel a lot better already.
HAPPY NEW YEAR It is a cold morning, frost everywhere but the sky is bright blue and there is no wind. A lovely winters day
It's like being in a room and you just come up to me and touch my shoulder and then walk off to deal with all your own pain in your own situation. It really is quite wonderful!!I SLEPT UNTIL 11am
When I got to bed Alan started whistling and chuntering again and I was so desperately worried that he would work himself up into the frenzy of the previous night
I gave him 2 paracetamol for just in case he got a temperature and then he slept. I only woke once to find Alan downstairs in the living room eating an apple and he seemed wide awake. This was about 4am. I brought him back to bed and he said he was cold. I got him warm and then we both slept again until gone 11am I feel a lot better already.HAPPY NEW YEAR It is a cold morning, frost everywhere but the sky is bright blue and there is no wind. A lovely winters day
That's some sleep, Helen...good for you..
Happy New Year from us!
We were in bed by 10, and I switched Eric's TV off about 10.30, he was fast asleep.
I was woken by fireworks at midnight and had a job to get back to sleep again...
We were up at 5...Eric is in bolshi mode today There's absolutely nothing wrong with him, he doesn't need carers and is perfectly capable of looking after himself.
I've removed myself to the kitchen..
Have a good day!
Love xx
Happy New Year from us!
We were in bed by 10, and I switched Eric's TV off about 10.30, he was fast asleep.
I was woken by fireworks at midnight and had a job to get back to sleep again...
We were up at 5...Eric is in bolshi mode today
There's absolutely nothing wrong with him, he doesn't need carers and is perfectly capable of looking after himself.I've removed myself to the kitchen..
Have a good day!
Love xx
Wonderful!
Helen, you needed that sleep. I hope it helps you get your body clock back in sync.
Quite a few of us had an `unusual` New Year`s Eve, to put it mildly.
At least we have been able to share even the fact we were unable to stay up to bring it in, or that we were alone, or not in the mood for Champagne toasts.
Without TP we might have thought the whole world was rejoicing, while we were tending our sick or grieving for those who are lost to us.
Helen, you needed that sleep. I hope it helps you get your body clock back in sync.
Quite a few of us had an `unusual` New Year`s Eve, to put it mildly.
At least we have been able to share even the fact we were unable to stay up to bring it in, or that we were alone, or not in the mood for Champagne toasts.
Without TP we might have thought the whole world was rejoicing, while we were tending our sick or grieving for those who are lost to us.
Absolutely Sylvia
I do feel that at least I have been spared those dreadful feelings and the depths into which one can plunge with themGood Gigi, the kitchen is a good place and Eric can get on with looking after himself for a moment or two
Love xx
dearest helen, 2010 is going to be a better year for us all, im sorry about your ups and downs highs and lows but you are an inspiration to us all you cope so well even if you dont realize it. im making it my new year resolution that before the year is out im coming on a train to see you and give you that hug chocies and to tell you how much we all love you, keep on fighting for all that you need and want for you and allan, love you lots my special freind lyn xxx
Advice Please
I've just been on the phone to a friend and I saw Alan standing by the sideboard. When I look over properly he was peeing on it and on the wall with it dripping down onto the carpet
I don't know what this will mean to our lives. How are the sitters supposed to cope with this because I firmly led him away (although too late). Here we go again - another stress and worry
Any advice will be gratefully received. Alan did say "I don't know where I am"
I've just been on the phone to a friend and I saw Alan standing by the sideboard. When I look over properly he was peeing on it and on the wall with it dripping down onto the carpet
I don't know what this will mean to our lives. How are the sitters supposed to cope with this because I firmly led him away (although too late). Here we go again - another stress and worry
Any advice will be gratefully received. Alan did say "I don't know where I am"
Oh Helen - no advice just empathy. During Christmas week we had pooh everywhere. Mum somehow managed to do it on her bed table which is an over bed variety. She had no idea she had done this or that it wasn't the loo she was on. Not the same as Alan but I wanted to send my thoughts.
Oh Helen...
This sounds like SusieSue's husband...
I don't know what to suggest...except regular toileting...which I try to do with Eric but it doesn't always work.
Alan obviously doesn't know where he is.
I remember years ago when I was with my first husband he came home drunk...we had walk in wardrobes. I woke up to find him peeing in my wardrobe...
I do wonder if it's a similar disorientation thing..but I have no answers.
It may be a "one off".
Monitor what is happening. It just means you will be on edge again ..I'm so sorry.
Love xx
This sounds like SusieSue's husband...
I don't know what to suggest...except regular toileting...which I try to do with Eric but it doesn't always work.
Alan obviously doesn't know where he is.
I remember years ago when I was with my first husband he came home drunk...we had walk in wardrobes. I woke up to find him peeing in my wardrobe...
I do wonder if it's a similar disorientation thing..but I have no answers.
It may be a "one off".
Monitor what is happening. It just means you will be on edge again ..I'm so sorry.
Love xx
Oh no... just to say I went through a similar thing with my Mum. She said "I think I'll do it here" and before we had a chance to move her anywhere near the bathroom, she did! And then one day she couldn't be bothered to sit down and did it standing up in the bathroom.
I hope it's just a "one-off". So sorry you have the worry.. xx
I hope it's just a "one-off". So sorry you have the worry.. xx
Sorry that Alan is going down that road, trev used to wee against the wardrobe or in corners, i can send you a pic of red toilet to stick on door or the word if Alan still is able to read, they often paint toilet door a bright red or yellow so that alzhiemer sufferes can distinguish dont know if this helps as Alans is ftd, would he accept pads or a convene, things seemto be taking a sudden downturn, thinking of you love pam
Thinking of you Helen. Such a shame that this happens to so very many, and not always easy to cope with.
Can remember these episodes with Lionel, they certainly keep you on your toes. How is Alan with his sitters normally as regards going to the bathroom?
Can remember these episodes with Lionel, they certainly keep you on your toes. How is Alan with his sitters normally as regards going to the bathroom?
Ken can never find the toilet and I have a great deal of trouble and wet, messy, bathroom floors even when I'm with him and trying to get him onto the toilet when he is either out with me or at home with me.
The worst time I had was when we first returned to England and as a temporary measure we were in an upstairs flat. As we wern't staying there long I left the floor bare with just the floor boards. Ken used to pee on the floor and I was beside myself worrying if the downstairs neighbour would be getting wet patches on her ceiling.
I can only echo what Pam says and advise you to get the pull up pads. They worked wonders for me.
The Care Home has now changed all the toilet lids from white to a very bright red. Ken does seem to be able to distinguish the toilet better with the bright red to guide him.
xxTinaT
The worst time I had was when we first returned to England and as a temporary measure we were in an upstairs flat. As we wern't staying there long I left the floor bare with just the floor boards. Ken used to pee on the floor and I was beside myself worrying if the downstairs neighbour would be getting wet patches on her ceiling.
I can only echo what Pam says and advise you to get the pull up pads. They worked wonders for me.
The Care Home has now changed all the toilet lids from white to a very bright red. Ken does seem to be able to distinguish the toilet better with the bright red to guide him.
xxTinaT
Alan had pull up pants on and he pulled them down enough to pee.
I am more worried about the devastating effects on me. It feels like all the balls have fallen to the floor again and my mind is in turmoil. I am supposed to work on Monday and as a lot of you know I work from home and I can't possibly think of working from home with pee and pooh (if this happens) all over the place
I am devastated because the implications of each little thing are massive.
I have phoned the care home tonight and asked them to talk to me about respite. The woman was lovely but the Manager wasn't there. By me doing this, it shows that I am not able to cope much longer. I could go through the emergency services tonight but social services are bad enough during the daytime so I don't want to risk a shambles with the emergency lot. I am sending an email to my own social worker tonight so that I can't get out of it.
I have phoned Alan's son who lives alone in Sheffield since he decided to abandon his family, and asked him to pick up his dad in the morning and keep him overnight so that I can get a break because I can't cope. He said he didn't think his place was safe for his dad and I said it would be safe because he would need to be on 24 hour alert just like I am on a permanent basis. He is coming in the morning but he didn't commit to the overnight.
I have had to ring my sister's place to say that I will not be able to see her tomorrow as planned. They were very kind and worried about me.
I can't stop crying tonight. I feel I have completely collapsed as a person.
I am more worried about the devastating effects on me. It feels like all the balls have fallen to the floor again and my mind is in turmoil. I am supposed to work on Monday and as a lot of you know I work from home and I can't possibly think of working from home with pee and pooh (if this happens) all over the place
I am devastated because the implications of each little thing are massive.
I have phoned the care home tonight and asked them to talk to me about respite. The woman was lovely but the Manager wasn't there. By me doing this, it shows that I am not able to cope much longer. I could go through the emergency services tonight but social services are bad enough during the daytime so I don't want to risk a shambles with the emergency lot. I am sending an email to my own social worker tonight so that I can't get out of it.
I have phoned Alan's son who lives alone in Sheffield since he decided to abandon his family, and asked him to pick up his dad in the morning and keep him overnight so that I can get a break because I can't cope. He said he didn't think his place was safe for his dad and I said it would be safe because he would need to be on 24 hour alert just like I am on a permanent basis. He is coming in the morning but he didn't commit to the overnight.
I have had to ring my sister's place to say that I will not be able to see her tomorrow as planned. They were very kind and worried about me.
I can't stop crying tonight. I feel I have completely collapsed as a person.
