Well can someone please tell the blasted borrowers it's time to move on
Reading this thread has made me smile ++ tonight and trust me, I so needed to smile - thanks to you all
Can I ... Should I?
- Thread starter Sam Luvit
- Start date
Reading this thread has made me smile ++ tonight and trust me, I so needed to smile - thanks to you all
Evening @DollyBird16
I don’t know how I managed to change the TV schedule either I must try it to get some new films or decent programmes one night
I’m thinking I might be off to the doc in the morning for a sample bottle (she’s moved my spare) Might be a UTI brewing. Oh no, just checked, full moon is on the 4th Always did call her the Irish Witch
Well, it has to be my fault, no one else here to blame & it couldn’t possibly be her, now could it
I’ve been handed a letter about boiler insurance .... while trying to dish up dinner, I love that one. The, this is more important than anything you are doing one, but at least I’ve not bothered to notice if anything is hidden tonight. Not got the energy
Well, you will have to get out the magic cream (pass the bottle please I need some too), old & wrinkly is the new me, well, it’s getting to be the old me
I don’t know how I managed to change the TV schedule either
I must try it to get some new films or decent programmes one night I’m thinking I might be off to the doc in the morning for a sample bottle (she’s moved my spare)
Might be a UTI brewing. Oh no, just checked, full moon is on the 4th Always did call her the Irish Witch Well, it has to be my fault, no one else here to blame & it couldn’t possibly be her, now could it
I’ve been handed a letter about boiler insurance .... while trying to dish up dinner, I love that one. The, this is more important than anything you are doing one, but at least I’ve not bothered to notice if anything is hidden tonight. Not got the energy
Well, you will have to get out the magic cream (pass the bottle please I need some too), old & wrinkly is the new me, well, it’s getting to be the old me
Reading this thread has made me smile ++ tonight and trust me, I so needed to smile - thanks to you all
Hi @Aud56 its good to smile, I even try to laugh at times although I think it might be coming out as a cackle tonight
Oh Sam, I'd be totally overwhelmed if it wasn't for the humour and understanding that oozes out of these posts. Keep cackling!
Hi @Aud56
I struggle with just my mum, how do you manage with both parents?
I hope the PA’s work well for you & your brother does keep his promise & give you those few days a month. I don’t thing anyone really gets how hard it is unless they see it first hand My brother is starting to understand how badly I need him to visit regularly, but it’s taken him 2 years to get to this point
I understand about your brother wanting your dad to be able to make decisions, even bad ones, but you are the one picking up the pieces. Just a suggestion, but it’s something I did with Mum.
I told Mum she was getting a cleaner, an hour a day, twice a week. I also said she was paying. She was not impressed at first, but I told her it wasn’t for her, it was for me, so I didn’t have to do everything. Could you make a similar suggestion to your dad, saying he should hire a cleaner, to help your mum? Someone coming in & running the hoover around, cleaning the bathroom & generally freshening the house made a Hugh difference to me.
Just a suggestion
I struggle with just my mum, how do you manage with both parents?
I hope the PA’s work well for you & your brother does keep his promise & give you those few days a month. I don’t thing anyone really gets how hard it is unless they see it first hand
My brother is starting to understand how badly I need him to visit regularly, but it’s taken him 2 years to get to this point I understand about your brother wanting your dad to be able to make decisions, even bad ones, but you are the one picking up the pieces. Just a suggestion, but it’s something I did with Mum.
I told Mum she was getting a cleaner, an hour a day, twice a week. I also said she was paying. She was not impressed at first, but I told her it wasn’t for her, it was for me, so I didn’t have to do everything. Could you make a similar suggestion to your dad, saying he should hire a cleaner, to help your mum? Someone coming in & running the hoover around, cleaning the bathroom & generally freshening the house made a Hugh difference to me.
Just a suggestion
Oh *blushes* thank you
Trust me I’m cackling, helped by a large glass of amber nectar, otherwise known as CM (Captain Morgan)
I have often, am afraid in past let the frustration of this disease get the better of me. Then feel so guilty for raising my voice or telling mum off. Your only human and sometimes it can not be helped
I often have found recently that mum loves a show in the morning on tv, Jeremy vile !!!
In her normal, past mentality she would never ever have given two minutes of her time to people screaming abuse at each other on tv. Now she loves it !!! In fact glued to this utter *rap !!
I've decided that if I ever start to love the above program, then I know that's it, dementia all the way for me !!
On another situation with mum yesterday, she was telling my brother that fifty something years ago our uncle was shot dead by a horrible man !!
The actual correct story is, he was killed by a hit and run driver.
I just sat there and listened to this, never commenting, thinking just a normal day
I often have found recently that mum loves a show in the morning on tv, Jeremy vile !!!
In her normal, past mentality she would never ever have given two minutes of her time to people screaming abuse at each other on tv. Now she loves it !!! In fact glued to this utter *rap !!
I've decided that if I ever start to love the above program, then I know that's it, dementia all the way for me !!
On another situation with mum yesterday, she was telling my brother that fifty something years ago our uncle was shot dead by a horrible man !!
The actual correct story is, he was killed by a hit and run driver.
I just sat there and listened to this, never commenting, thinking just a normal day
Hi @Aud56
I struggle with just my mum, how do you manage with both parents?
I hope the PA’s work well for you & your brother does keep his promise & give you those few days a month. I don’t thing anyone really gets how hard it is unless they see it first hand
I understand about your brother wanting your dad to be able to make decisions, even bad ones, but you are the one picking up the pieces. Just a suggestion, but it’s something I did with Mum.
I told Mum she was getting a cleaner, an hour a day, twice a week. I also said she was paying. She was not impressed at first, but I told her it wasn’t for her, it was for me, so I didn’t have to do everything. Could you make a similar suggestion to your dad, saying he should hire a cleaner, to help your mum? Someone coming in & running the hoover around, cleaning the bathroom & generally freshening the house made a Hugh difference to me.
Just a suggestion
Hi Sam,
My 'visiting brother' is an absolute star and has been through his diary and mine last night and sorted out 4 monthly visits he can do between now to February and told me to book the train tickets home, so that I know for sure they're going to happen. Just knowing I'll have 3 or 4 days on my own in my wee flat is all that's keeping me going right now.
My other brother just lacks that same level of understanding and seems very judgemental when I'm struggling and getting it wrong, so I tend to withdraw from him. It's not like I don't know when I've blown it, so why he feels the need to hammer the point home is beyond me.
The 2 PAs really are lovely and between them they cover the household tasks of laundry, hoovering and a light dusting session, as well as taking mum out for long walks in her wheelchair the minute we have a dry day and they text even when not on duty just to tell me a joke or ask if I'm okay. I truly am incredibly blessed to have found them.
In addition, I've a boss who fell straight out of heaven in my opinion and she does everything work wise to ensure I can have the flexibility I need to care for mum and dad and somehow get my work done too. She send me surprise presents of chocolates and bunches of sunflowers, texts regularly just to check in with me and is so incredibly caring and encouraging.
How long have you been looking after your mum? I really hope your brother's understanding of the emotional and mental cost expands rapidly and he gives you the support you need. My little army of PAs, 'visiting brother', lovely boss, supportive work team, really practical friends and now you guys on here truly are what helps me get through on a day to day basis, so I hope for more of that for you.
I know @Margi29 i know. You can’t argue with dementia. But, it’s one of those days. Dog woke me at silly O’clock, but I went back to sleep, then it was full on, dropping stuff at the charity shop, taking brother fishing, banging tiles off a wall for P, shopping, cooking ... I hurt, my knee is nicely swollen, my back / pelvis is screaming at me & then Mum goes off on one & I just snapped
Mum never watched soaps, barely watched TV, but now it’s Home & Away, Emmerdale, Coronation Street ... & yes, Jeremy Vile. This dementia thing has a lot to answer for
I mostly keep my trap shut these days, it’s just when I’m tired or in pain. Maybe I should throw back a few opiate tabs & chill
Mum never watched soaps, barely watched TV, but now it’s Home & Away, Emmerdale, Coronation Street ... & yes, Jeremy Vile. This dementia thing has a lot to answer for
I mostly keep my trap shut these days, it’s just when I’m tired or in pain. Maybe I should throw back a few opiate tabs & chill
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@Aud56 I agree hats off to @Sam Luvit its such a great thread. It’s heartwarming to read that you get fab genuine support.
@Margi29 ew! Jeremy, noooooo. I feel for you even having it on, I shout at the tv if I comes on and it rapidly gets switched off.
I’m more of a house programme you know renovating stuff, mainly cos I like to nose in people’s houses. Knew it was a mistake wanting to watch one tonight,just get settled Mum decides it’s time for me and her to go on a treasure hunt, but hey Dad kindly told me it was good....
Night all catch up tomorrow. XXX
@Margi29 ew! Jeremy, noooooo. I feel for you even having it on, I shout at the tv if I comes on and it rapidly gets switched off.
I’m more of a house programme you know renovating stuff, mainly cos I like to nose in people’s houses.
Knew it was a mistake wanting to watch one tonight,just get settled Mum decides it’s time for me and her to go on a treasure hunt, but hey Dad kindly told me it was good....Night all catch up tomorrow. XXX
I'm more of a ' good thriller ' or ' historical or documentary ' programme @DollyBird16
The scary thing is my oh actually likes Jeremy vile, now that scares the pants off me lol
Can you imagine?? I worry he too may eventually develop this awful disease, he is already forgetting loads of things
I'm praying not to have to deal with dementia again after mum, after losing dad to it already, hate this disease.
The scary thing is my oh actually likes Jeremy vile, now that scares the pants off me lol
Can you imagine?? I worry he too may eventually develop this awful disease, he is already forgetting loads of things
I'm praying not to have to deal with dementia again after mum, after losing dad to it already, hate this disease.
Yes I agree Sam is definitely an inspiration on this thread, keeps me sane, and makes me laugh too.
Although I don't get to post as often as in the past, I keep reading the posts and enjoy keeping up with everyone.
Praying for Slugsta and thinking of her mum x
Although I don't get to post as often as in the past, I keep reading the posts and enjoy keeping up with everyone.
Praying for Slugsta and thinking of her mum x
My oh is the same, yes he likes the vile. Forget stuff, messaged me the other day saying remind me I have an appointment at 12, it was 11 when he messaged, he was home so doing nothing. Forgets loads of stuff gets really anxious.
I’m carrying on as is cross the bridge when I get to it.
Subject change did you watch the new historical one Gunpowder - too gory for me.
I’m carrying on as is cross the bridge when I get to it.
Subject change did you watch the new historical one Gunpowder - too gory for me.
Oh @Aud56 I'm so jealous, but in a good way
Having something to look forward to just is the best. The thought of those days in your own space will get you through the tough times. The idea of the Liverpool meet up got me through Christmas, (meeting Margi & Rosy was the best thing that happened), the thought of a holiday(which unfortunately didn’t happen) got me through to the Blackpool dementia holiday with Mum in tow, then to September when I did manage the Ireland meet up (that was loads of fun). I’m now just grinding through the days with no goal, so I get your booking train tickets as a big thing. Big congratulations to your “visiting brother”, he’s stepping up & supporting you in this. Maybe he can talk some sense into the other brother Could I borrow him to talk to my brother
The ones that pass judgement without getting their hands dirty are referred to as “invisibles” Unfortunately the only thing you can do, is smile sweetly, thank them (find a roof top to scream on) & ignore them. If only it was so easy
Your PA’s sound amazing. Wish you could clone them & send one here They are obviously caring souls & keeping in touch even when not “on duty”shows their caring natures. It’s so good to hear some positives. Most comments are the negatives, so good news is just the best to hear
And you get the boss from heaven. You must have some great Karma. I wish more bosses were like yours. It would make it so much easier. I could be a killjoy & say it’s actually very good business sense to be a great boss, as you get the very best out of your staff, but it takes a decent person to be a great boss, so I’ll just say she is amazing & blooming lucky to have a hard working person working with her
I was living 80 miles away, but visiting every third, then every other weekend. Mum broke her hip in May 2014 & I did the 160 round trip every weekend from then till August 2015, when I put my house on the market & quit my lovely job & moved back So, I’ve been full time with her for just over 2 years. Where does the time go???
My brother has been very honest. He can’t be around Mum without wanting to strangle her, so it wouldn’t work him trying. I do understand. It frustrates me as I’ve put aside (as much as I can) the never ending criticism as a child, but he can’t So we’ve settled on him being there for me. He visits every weekend for a few hours, so I get to chat with him & Mum is happy her darling son has been. But, I’ve told him I will phone & rant about her & he will pick up the phone. I also phone & go visit him for coffee if I just have to get out. So far, it’s worked. (He’s 5 miles from Mum
Such is life. But, at least I can look myself in the mirror & know I’ve done the best I can. Not that I do look in the mirror much as it’s a frightening sight
Having something to look forward to just is the best. The thought of those days in your own space will get you through the tough times. The idea of the Liverpool meet up got me through Christmas, (meeting Margi & Rosy was the best thing that happened), the thought of a holiday(which unfortunately didn’t happen) got me through to the Blackpool dementia holiday with Mum in tow, then to September when I did manage the Ireland meet up (that was loads of fun). I’m now just grinding through the days with no goal, so I get your booking train tickets as a big thing. Big congratulations to your “visiting brother”, he’s stepping up & supporting you in this. Maybe he can talk some sense into the other brother
Could I borrow him to talk to my brother The ones that pass judgement without getting their hands dirty are referred to as “invisibles”
Unfortunately the only thing you can do, is smile sweetly, thank them (find a roof top to scream on) & ignore them. If only it was so easy Your PA’s sound amazing. Wish you could clone them & send one here
They are obviously caring souls & keeping in touch even when not “on duty”shows their caring natures. It’s so good to hear some positives. Most comments are the negatives, so good news is just the best to hear And you get the boss from heaven. You must have some great Karma. I wish more bosses were like yours. It would make it so much easier. I could be a killjoy & say it’s actually very good business sense to be a great boss, as you get the very best out of your staff, but it takes a decent person to be a great boss, so I’ll just say she is amazing & blooming lucky to have a hard working person working with her
I was living 80 miles away, but visiting every third, then every other weekend. Mum broke her hip in May 2014 & I did the 160 round trip every weekend from then till August 2015, when I put my house on the market & quit my lovely job & moved back
So, I’ve been full time with her for just over 2 years. Where does the time go???My brother has been very honest. He can’t be around Mum without wanting to strangle her, so it wouldn’t work him trying. I do understand. It frustrates me as I’ve put aside (as much as I can) the never ending criticism as a child, but he can’t
So we’ve settled on him being there for me. He visits every weekend for a few hours, so I get to chat with him & Mum is happy her darling son has been. But, I’ve told him I will phone & rant about her & he will pick up the phone. I also phone & go visit him for coffee if I just have to get out. So far, it’s worked. (He’s 5 miles from Mum Such is life. But, at least I can look myself in the mirror & know I’ve done the best I can. Not that I do look in the mirror much as it’s a frightening sight
Oh hush up. You’ll make my head swell. I’m not doing any more than anyone else. You have more to deal with than I do & your Mum is further along. At least mine is just stroppy toddler & I only
eek need to keep my temper Yes, I’ve been checking over on Slugsta, it’s quiet right now. So hard on her
Hi @DollyBird16
Forgetting things, or mixing up the time or day I think Mum has reminded me about having my hair done 3 or 4 times so far this week. (I’m going back to my natural colour after my sun bleached look)
What is it about Vile???? Awful programme. But Mum is transfixed. Mouth open. Intent stare. She would have pulled the plug pre dementia, now it’s like it’s gospel or something????
No. What’s Gunpowder? Sounds like a Guy Falks theme. I always miss new programmes What channel? I could go a bit of gory
Forgetting things, or mixing up the time or day
I think Mum has reminded me about having my hair done 3 or 4 times so far this week. (I’m going back to my natural colour after my sun bleached look) What is it about Vile???? Awful programme. But Mum is transfixed. Mouth open. Intent stare. She would have pulled the plug pre dementia, now it’s like it’s gospel or something????
No. What’s Gunpowder? Sounds like a Guy Falks theme. I always miss new programmes
What channel? I could go a bit of gory I did watch it, they certainly were inventive in those days in ways of getting people to talk and finish them off
BBC 1 I think last episode this week, but you can watch all episodes on iPlayerHi @DollyBird16
Forgetting things, or mixing up the time or day
What is it about Vile???? Awful programme. But Mum is transfixed. Mouth open. Intent stare. She would have pulled the plug pre dementia, now it’s like it’s gospel or something????
No. What’s Gunpowder? Sounds like a Guy Falks theme. I always miss new programmes
