Bunpoots, I hope your dad doesn't s more comfortable and being well looked after and that you feel you are able to get some rest. All best wishes to you. And some (((((((hugs))))))), of course!
Sometimes these decisions are made for us @Bunpoots.
Thanks @Amy in the US
Dad looked comfortable and was tapping his fingers on the side of an empty mug when we arrived. He was pleased to see us but not making much sense. His bed can be seen from the nurses station.
If he has another bleed he might be moved to a larger hospital about 15 miles away. I hope not. I'm hoping he'll make a full recovery. There's still talk of getting him back home but if this latest episode has left him unable to walk I'm not sure what to do. It'll take two carers to move him which will be very expensive.
Probably time to consider a nursing home.
Best to be prepared for all eventualities in these cases isn't it Bunpoots ? I hope your dad is comfortable and doesn't upset you or himself if it comes to the move to a nursing home, if it does. Keep calm and count to 10 billion lol.
Ah, I thought it might be something like that @BLIP
Thats a SW with very little understanding of dementia and the delusions that go with it. Im so sorry. I would go to the meeting to make sure that your side of the story is heard, even if that SW is present.
Hello @Cazzita , nice to 'meet' you
I don't think anyone can know exactly what's ahead, as everyone is so different. I had incidents with my mum like the one you describe, a good ten years prior to her diagnosis. Between these events she was able to function reasonably well. It was only when this and worse were constant that I felt urgently in need of help.
I hope this is of some reassurance to you - but of course, as I say, everyone is different....
All the best to you.
Lindy xx
Very difficult to sit in a room with a bully S.W. and listen to his BS. He believes everything M.I.L. says and obviously has no or little experience with dementia, if he did he would know that DP lie through their teeth to everyone including themselves ! I have shed so many tears this last week because hubby is so upset and hurt that the SW has branded him an abuser in front of police who were on the side of the SW. I know they both have a duty of care but hubby was treated like a criminal. Hubby is in dreadful pain with his leg, hence amputation and suffers from depression but is given no chance to defend himself ! He is a clergyman and has worked in geriatric hospitals so he's used to OAP'S with mental problems and has performed the last rites on more than he can count. The police even told him he shouldn't be wearing his clerical collar and crucifix the damn cheek. He worked hard for it and lives his life accordingly which makes the situation even harder to deal with. End of rant for now. Take care of yourself canary x
Oh this is awful to hear! Poor man. @BLIP, I hope things imrove for him quickly and that people in charge can be more sympathetic. No excuses for this kind of cold attitude towards anyone
Very difficult to sit in a room with a bully S.W. and listen to his BS. He believes everything M.I.L. says and obviously has no or little experience with dementia, if he did he would know that DP lie through their teeth to everyone including themselves ! I have shed so many tears this last week because hubby is so upset and hurt that the SW has branded him an abuser in front of police who were on the side of the SW. I know they both have a duty of care but hubby was treated like a criminal. Hubby is in dreadful pain with his leg, hence amputation and suffers from depression but is given no chance to defend himself ! He is a clergyman and has worked in geriatric hospitals so he's used to OAP'S with mental problems and has performed the last rites on more than he can count. The police even told him he shouldn't be wearing his clerical collar and crucifix the damn cheek. He worked hard for it and lives his life accordingly which makes the situation even harder to deal with. End of rant for now. Take care of yourself canary x
Sorry to hear about your dads fall and subsequent hospitalisation. Let’s hope he can soon play that game of badminton and visit the theatre (as long as it's not the one my mum went to ).
Re care home, could you put him in one after discharge to see how it goes, on the pretence of getting well, hospital said so etc. He’s never going to like it when it happens because there’s nothing wrong with him , but at least you can blame the drs and hospital rather than him blaming you.
Hello vicx and welcome to Talking Point. I can't tell you how much comfort this site has given me!
My dad has been through phases of telling the neighbours he's not seen a soul for weeks and the neighbours have put him right cos they've seen us visiting every day!
I know just what you mean about losing yourself to caring, I am just finding myself again. It creeps up, and takes over, this caring lark. And trying to deal with an illogical and ungrateful needy person is soul-sucking!
As you've read my thread you'll realise that I've very recently brought in professional carers. I didn't ask dad if he wanted or needed them - he'd have said he was fine. I introduced them by stealth. They visited, did an assessment (which dad wasn't pleased about as he thinks there's nothing wrong with him) and started visiting and helping gradually. I'm not sure dad's even noticed that his routine has changed. He's certainly happier now - and so am I. I should have done it months ago!!
I don't think my dad should really live alone either, but he hates noise, not really a people person either so I think the care home will be a last resort. He likes his own space.
You're lucky to be able to share with your sister but you still sound very stressed! Could you persuade your mum to go to daycare (you could call it a club or a craft group) to give you both a day off?
You are entitled to a care assessment for your mum and carers assessments for you and your sister. If you contact SS you may be pleasantly surprised at what they can offer.