Yes, it's the closeness and also having someone to share thoughts with; even when he had dementia, I always shared my thoughts with him.
I have to accept that this aspect isn't going to get easier.
I have to agree with you Jan. At my age the aloneness is not going to go away. I thought I had resigned myself to that but have discovered it makes no difference, resignation. There have been times when I thought it did, times when dealing with other matters. But it is there, the aloneness - it is an emptiness.
As your friend Pat said, Sylvia, not lonely but alone. A different 'being alone' from when we were a couple. Yes, we are all in the same boat. It seems to be an aspect of loss we could not be aware of until afterwards.
All that one can read about bereavement, what is never mentioned is the physical loss of the person, their presence.
Like you 2jays I have no answers - if there are any - only understanding and empathy.
Love
Loo xxx