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A new stage in my life...................

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Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
70,674
Kent
Before it was about Us . Now it will be about Me. Is that why some people find it so difficult to post here.
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
61,074
68
Dundee
It must be so hard Sylvia. x


Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point mobile app
 

jenniferpa

Registered User
Jun 27, 2006
39,448
I think so Sylvia. I think that it can seem to be almost traitorous to post somewhere which explicitly acknowledges that you have lost a person you love.
 

Pigeon11

Registered User
Jul 19, 2012
351
I'm sure you do Sylvia. I hate to sound trite, but it will get better.

It must have been so hard for you to take the first step and post here but don't forget all your TP friends are still here to support you.

xx
 

dizzywizzy

Registered User
Mar 23, 2012
143
It must be odd as I feel it and I never posted as much as you did. I guess part of me is still holding onto something to do with my Dad, as I read the posts on here most days and they were very comforting (and still are)and helped me cope with the last few years of my Dads illness.
 

jeany123

Registered User
Mar 24, 2012
19,036
70
Durham
It must feel different, I have always valued your wise words and experience and still do,


Love Jeany xx
 

2jays

Registered User
Jun 4, 2010
11,598
West Midlands
No, I don’t feel a traitor, I feel odd.
I don't mean to sound flippant, but for me, I guess it would feel a bit like being a "newbie" again

As it is, I feel like "an old hand" on some of the other forums, and to specifically start a thread on this forum would mean things had drastically changed for me and I guess it would feel like I'm starting all over again, but about me not my mum, with the uncertainty I had when I first joined TP of what the future holds.

When ever I read posts on this forum, I often think "I will be posting on here one day, but not not for ages I hope" and then one day, that will feel too soon no doubt, I shall be posting here.

I know, when it happens, that I too will feel odd starting a thread here.

xxxx
 
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Saffie

Registered User
Mar 26, 2011
22,506
Near Southampton
To be honest, I don't notice where threads are posted as I always go straight to Recent Posts so hadn't noticed where you'd posted, Sylvia, until I actually read your post. However, I can understand how difficult it must be to begin a new thread in this particular section. It is a new beginning but also, so sadly, an ending of your old thread which has taken you - and us - through so very much over the years.

I look forward to following your new thread as your comments, advice and guidance have helped so much. I do hope that doesn't sound insensitive, and hope that you know that I don't mean it to be so. I really would have been happier to continue with your 'us' thread as I know would you but sadly, you have taken this brave step into the future and I hope I can tag along behind you. love XXX
 

CollegeGirl

Registered User
Jan 19, 2011
9,524
North East England
This has never happened to me Sylvia so I don't know ... but just wanted to say that you mean a lot to everyone on TP and we are here to support you through the next stage.

Much love xxx
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
70,674
Kent
We sat with Dhiren all night in death. It was all right. We were with him. He was still with us.

When I was told his brain had been taken for research, it didn`t upset me. For the first time in my life I understood it was just his body which had been cut. By then, his true being had left .

The assistant to the funeral director said they would let us know when he was ready to be visited.

I didn`t want to see him in a coffin. My last memories of him in his bed were good.

The funeral Director phoned a couple of days later to let me know he was ready to be seen. I refused. I didn`t want to go.

And then something caused me to change my mind. It was about regret. If I didn`t go to see him, I wouldn`t have another chance and knew I would regret it .

I feel I should see Dhiren through every stage of the way . I told Paul and the family last night and Paul said it felt right.

The person who will conduct the funeral is coming today. I will go to sit with Dhiren after he has gone.
 

Nanak

Registered User
Mar 25, 2010
1,973
60
Brisbane Australia
After Mum passed I felt, all of a sudden, that I had nothing to offer. Mum was gone, and to be honest, I couldn't remember a lot. When was this stage? What happened at that stage? How long did this stage last? When she did this, that, or the other, how did everyone cope? When others posted I could relate to their problems but didn't know how to reply. It has passed to a certain extent, but I don't post as much as I used to.
It is a very odd feeling......

Kim
 

2jays

Registered User
Jun 4, 2010
11,598
West Midlands
I hope you manage to see Dhiren and it's not too traumatic for you, just the final gentle good bye.

I hesitate, but feel I must ask if you have contacted the funeral director, to let them know you wish to visit Dhiren.

I assumed we could just go and visit when we wanted to, but we had to make a special appointment. We had to wait a day before we were able to visit

xx
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
70,674
Kent
After Mum passed I felt, all of a sudden, that I had nothing to offer. Mum was gone, and to be honest, I couldn't remember a lot. When was this stage? What happened at that stage? How long did this stage last? When she did this, that, or the other, how did everyone cope? When others posted I could relate to their problems but didn't know how to reply. It has passed to a certain extent, but I don't post as much as I used to.
It is a very odd feeling......

Kim
You lived with very difficult circumstances NanaK. Whatever you can`t respond to in practicalities I`m sure you can empathise with feelings.
 
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