Worried about John

DeborahBlythe

Registered User
Dec 1, 2006
9,222
they said they were short staffed. But the afternoon carers said they were at home, and would have come in if anyone had phoned.
They just picked a bad day!
Oh good heavens Hazel, no wonder you went ballistic. I'm so sorry to read all this recent thread and hope things are more to your liking now. In my mum's home I never trust the staffing levels and skills at weekends and Bank Holidays. On the Saturday before Christmas three of the carers in my mum's home rang in sick. There have been a lot of bugs around but it makes you wonder. I found my mum in an over crowded dining room that day with her top dentures out and her spectacles perched wonkily upside down on her nose with their 'arms' pointing upwards. The best carer in the home was present but 'losing it' with some of the residents who were needing more time than she could spare and she was trying to run around feeding over thirty residents with the help of just one other member of staff, a young lad. Two or three residents were calling out pitifully for attention and driving other residents into fits of bad temper. Lord love us all.

Do you know what? I envy you the chance to go away briefly and take a walk with Skye. I reckon that dog is keeping you sane and fit. I was in a pub on New Year's Eve in the afternoon and there was a man with two Skyes: one white and one black. One looked like the real Skye and the other looked like a photographic negative. What lovely personalities they have! I thought about you and wondered how things were going. I'm really sorry they have been so fraught. There shouldn't be any issue about how long John stays in bed . The staff must turn him regularly and check on him and maintain fluids. It's pretty straightforward.

I lost it today with my mum's home over a very trivial issue. Her Christmas cards had disappeared. I searched her cupboards and drawers and found a stack of birthday cards nestling amongst her tights and undies. I had wondered where the birthday cards had gone earlier in December but assumed my brother had taken them away. I couldn't find the Christmas cards and suspected, rightly, that they had been collected up and prematurely stuffed in the recycling box downstairs.

I don't know why this upset me so much. It's hardly on a par with leaving someone inadequately dressed, but it really annoyed me, especially as one of the carers didn't seem to think it was much to worry about. The cards contained a few lines in them from stalwart friends which I wanted to respond to on my mum's behalf and someone had taken the view that they had the right to remove them and consign them to the waste bin. I fished them out and placed them under close supervision.:)

I ended up barking at a carer, which is really not like me at all. Then I whined at the Manager and received an apology, so I went away with my ruffled feathers partly smoothed down.:eek: My mum spotted this Manager one day and said quite loudly " Who is that funny little man? He keeps wobbling around all the time." A comment made more embarrassing because that 'funny little man' is in fact a lady who favours stern trouser suits and fearsomely cropped hair.:eek:

I'm really sorry that you are noticing such a rapid decline in John. I know your vigilance will ensure the best possible care for him, and like Connie, I'd say don't rush into early decisions about caring for him at home. Try to give the home more time to get things right if you can bear it. You have sounded so positive up to now. Sending you both very best wishes, and a kiss on the nose for Skye . Love Deborah
 
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Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Do you know what? I envy you the chance to go away briefly and take a walk with Skye. I reckon that dog is keeping you sane and fit.
Not so sure about the sane and fit, Deborah. Mental and physical wreck at the moment, but yes, it's lovely to be welcomed home, even if it is only to throw the ball for her to catch!

" Who is that funny little man? He keeps wobbling around all the time." A comment made more embarrassing because that 'funny little man' is in fact a lady who favours stern trouser suits and cropped hair.:eek:
I love that. Your mum sounds such a character!:)


I'd say don't rush into early decisions about caring for him at home. Try to give the home more time to get things right. Sending you both very best wishes

No. I'm not rushing into anything. I know how hard it would be, even with a care package, and it wouldn't do John any good to keep moving him. I really hope things will be OK now, and it's almost a year till Christmas! I just couldn't cope with another week like this one.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
71,048
Kent
Dear Hazel, there`s nothing I can add that hasn`t already been said, just heartfelt sympathy coming your way.

It`s a great shame there isn`t a person spec to demonstrate vocational aptitude, for applicants for posts in care homes. It is always so much more upsetting when those affected are unable to speak up for themselves.

Take care xx
 

Nell

Registered User
Aug 9, 2005
1,170
68
Australia
Dear Hazel,

It just goes to show that we need to be ever vigilant and to continually "fight" for what our loved ones need and deserve. Thank goodness for John that he has you.

Please take care of yourself too. Thinking of you and sending you warmest wishes as ever.
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Just a quick update -- second attempt, I lost the last one.

There's not much improvement in John's condition. He's still very wheezy, and his heels are getting worse, not better.

The heel protectors arrived today, I've just sewn on the name tapes, and will take them in tomorrow. They look great, and will fit over the dressings. Many thanks, CassElle.

CassElle said:
With regards to John's heels - I bought Mum a pair of sheepskin heel protectors from Millercare. They are open toed and fasten across with velcro
On the positive side, the reclining chair and air bed have made a huge difference to his comfort, and because he's resting better, he's more alert when he is awake.

There's a huge improvement in the standard of care since the row on Wednesday. The staff can't do enough for us, and John now has a 2-hour repositioning chart in his room, so they can't get away with anything. The charge nurse of the other section also came to see me and apologised (though it wasn't her fault), and said if I had any problems when out CN wasn't on, to come and see her immediately.

BUT -- I've also been warned not to expect too much improvement in John's condition, and he's unlikely to walk again.:(
 

Taffy

Registered User
Apr 15, 2007
1,314
Dear Hazel,

It is good news that John is now receiving the right care, thankfully he is more comfortable with the bed and chair.

I am sorry that John's ability to walk again isn't looking to promising. Hopefully, John proves them wrong.

Caring Thoughts, Taffy.
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
london
There's a huge improvement in the standard of care since the row on Wednesday. The staff can't do enough for us, and John now has a 2-hour repositioning chart in his room, so they can't get away with anything. The charge nurse of the other section also came to see me and apologised (though it wasn't her fault), and said if I had any problems when out CN wasn't on, to come and see her immediately.

BUT -- I've also been warned not to expect too much improvement in John's condition, and he's unlikely to walk again
Does seem with this disease that its all about balancing the positive with the negative .

Well done xx
 

gigi

Registered User
Nov 16, 2007
7,788
66
East Midlands
Dear Hazel, Glad to hear John is more comfortable and systems are in place to keep him that way.
Take care of yourself.

love Gigi xx
 

Cliff

Registered User
Jun 29, 2007
777
North Wales
Dear Hazel,

Have just read your postings and, as you wrote, it makes distressing reading.

I just hope that if Dee needs such care sometime in the future, I will have the same strength as you to put things right.

Can only send my love to you both and when I'm doing things for Dee as she is now I will be thinking of you,
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
I just hope that if Dee needs such care sometime in the future, I will have the same strength as you to put things right.

Dear Cliff, thank you. I'm not a natural fighter, I'm more inclined to walk away when I'm attacked, but I'm not prepared to walk away when John is being badly treated, and I'm sure you'd be exactly the same with Dee. You'll find the strength if you need it, though hopefully you won't.

Love,
 

blue sea

Registered User
Aug 24, 2005
270
England
Dear Hazel
What can I say, except well done for fighting for John. He would be so proud of you, I'm sure. Take comfort that he is now comfortable and try not to anticipate the future too much.
Blue sea
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
I took this photo today, of John in his 'new' chair. It looks too small for him, but it's not, it was made for a man of John's height, and widthwise it's perfect. The legrest will extend, but for now he's better with his feet dangling.

He's got his new heel protectors on too, and they work well over the dressings. Apparently they used to use sheepskin protectors in the home, but now no longer do - no-one knows why! But it's all right as long as I supply them!

John's still very chesty, but much more alert
 
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gigi

Registered User
Nov 16, 2007
7,788
66
East Midlands
Oh Hazel ...

I had to do a double take - john looks so much like eric in that photo. the hair ,the features, just the whole person. It's given me shivers... sorry.

Wouldn't want to upset you for the world and glad you posted the picture-it's just a bit uncanny.

He does look comfortable though :)
Love gigi xx
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
71,048
Kent
That looks so much better Hazel. He looks safe and comfortable. It`s ideal for his sore feet too, absolutely no pressure. I hope it will help the healing.
Love xx
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Thanks Gigi and Sylvia. It has made so much difference to him. He's even beginning to try to respond when I talk to him, and he hasn't done that for ages.

I had to do a double take - john looks so much like eric in that photo. the hair ,the features, just the whole person. It's given me shivers... sorry.

Wouldn't want to upset you for the world and glad you posted the picture-it's just a bit uncanny.

Not upset at all. Shows we both have excellent taste, Gigi!:D

Love,
 

connie

Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
9,519
Frinton-on-Sea
Hazel, thanks for posting the picture of John.

It is good to see him looking a little more alert. Sending you both love n'hugs, as usual.
 

elaineo2

Registered User
Jul 6, 2007
945
leigh lancashire
Dear Hazel,what a lovely photo of John.He looks well looked after and am sure he is.Those chairs are wonderful,my uncle John had one in the nursing home he was in.bless you and him.
just a note on the sheepskin protectors,if am out of line please say so,its only my training on pressure damage that brings me to say that sheepskin was acceptable until a few years ago.Moving and handling of a patient with sheepskin protectors in place were shown to cause friction damage,friction damage can lead to pressure areas developing,thats why they are no longer used in care settings.Like you said if you provide them then that is fine,but a risk assesssment must be put in place.
sorry,i never let my work go do i?
love and the best to you both elainex
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Thanks, Elaine. Yes, they told me that they had used them until a few years ago and then they were banned.

But John already has friction sores from rubbing his heels in bed, and they're not healing. Also, he still rubs, and can sometimes rub the dressings off. I think wearing the protectors over the dressings a) provides a softer surface, and b) helps keep the dressings in place.

I may be wrong, but as they weren't healing anyway, anything's worth a try!
 

BeckyJan

Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
18,972
Derbyshire
Hello Hazel:

John look good in his chair and I am pleased he is now responding to you again. I just hope now that his heels heal quickly.

Take care yourself. Best wishes Jan