Worried about John


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
I’m very worried about John. I’m afraid the infection may be resurfacing.

For the last two weeks he’s had a couple of good days, but more bad ones.

On a good day, he recognises me, not as Hazel, or his wife, but as someone he’s pleased to see. He responds to me, and understands some of what I say, if I keep repeating it, and use lots of signs. He can walk round the corridors with me, and enjoy his cup of tea and cake.

On bad days, I had very little response, he didn’t want to walk, and spent most of my visit lying on his bed. He didn’t understand anything I said.

Today was the worst since he left hospital. He had been found on the floor at 6 am. There is no bruising, so they think he was just getting out of bed and his legs went from under him. He was still in pyjamas, having refused to get dressed. He was asleep in his chair, and he couldn’t get up to get to bed. I had to feed him his tea and cake, and apparently he’d had to be fed at lunchtime.

In other words, just like he was before he went to hospital.

I’ve asked them to test his urine, and they’re going to. Of course, it’s weekend again!

I feel so down tonight.


Registered User
Oct 17, 2007
kelowna, bc, canada
You poor thing. My dad had a bad chest infection earlier in the year and it knocked the stuffing out of him. He went down quite badly after that, and then briefly bobbed back up again. Hopefully it is an infection which can be treated and he'll bounce back a bit too.

I've been feeling 'Eeyore-ish' today too as my dad's had a bad couple of days.

So, be assured there are others who are with you - at least in spirit - and thinking of you.


Registered User
May 14, 2006
Dear Hazel,
My Mum seemed to have lots of ups and downs.
Sometimes she wouldn't feed herself and needed help, then later on she was back to a more "normal state" and eating independently.
As she had vascular dementia, this was probably the way the illness was progressing.
Several times, Mum did recover from a very low point and there would be times when she almost seemed like her old self.
I think Mum could have gone on like that for years, if she hadn't had an unexpected heart attack, which was quite unrelated to the dementia (she was 82).

Perhaps things are not as bad as you think and John will get better in time.
I'll be thinking of you,



Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
Dear Hazel, does sound as if it could be another uti.

Would never believe the damage they can do to a persons general wellbeing if I had not seen it for myself with Lionel.

Do hope that you get some answers soon, and that John gets back on an even keel. Thinking of you my love.


Registered User
Jun 3, 2005
Hazel, I'm so sorry this is an (extra)worrrying time for you - as you say, these things always seem to crop up at weekends or Bank Hols., when personnel & services are restricted. I hope John (and you!) feel better soon.

okmurrays said:
I've been feeling 'Eeyore-ish' today ...
Ahh Murray, another Winnie the Pooh kid! Noddy? Pah!


Registered User
Sep 5, 2007
East Sussex

I'm only just learning about the problems involved, so I can't offer any practical advice. However, I have read many posts where loved ones seem to bounce back after one problem or another. I do hope this turns out to be the same for you.

Yes - weekends and Bank Holidays. We get this with our animals too. We have 45 of them and I can guarantee that if anything is going to happen, it will be at just after midday on Saturday, when the vet has closed.

Chin up and do something that will make you happy, even for a short while.



Registered User
Sep 19, 2007
Oh Skye. I am so sorry. I haven't been on TP for long as you know but you have always been there for me and you always come across as someone so strong. I am sad that you are feeling so down. Being a novice at all this I have almost nothing to offer you - except my thoughts, best wishes and hugs.

love from Sammyb


Registered User
Jul 6, 2007
leigh lancashire
Dear Hazel.you hit the nail on thr head!its weekend!why do these things happen at the weekend when there is very little that can be done,unless its a dire emergency!I do know a way to get round it but am afraid TP wouldn"t condone it.Nothing illegal though!its who you know not what you know i am afraid.
I hope you can cope for the weekend!push the cranberry juice!love elainex


Registered User
Aug 9, 2005
Dear Hazel,
I hope you get an answer soon. I'm so sorry that John has had this backward step - may it prove to be short lived.

fearful fiona

Registered User
Apr 19, 2007
Dear Hazel,

So sorry to read this news and sorry you are down as you are so strong and good at cheering up other people. These wretched infections, my Dad struggles from one to another, I do hope it is just that and gets sorted. Yes, everything always happens at a weekend.

Much love to you and John, I am thinking of you...


Registered User
Apr 15, 2007
Dear Hazel,

I hope that things improve for John soon. Sorry that you have this worry again. Take good care. Best Wishes Taffy.


Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
Just quickly on tp - not had much time lately.

So sorry to hear that you have more worry about John. Cannot add any more than the other posts but just wanted you know that I am thinking about you.

Take care Jan


Registered User
Jul 31, 2007
Dear Hazel,
So sorry that to hear about John. As previous threads have said I hope it is another episiod they go through for a couple of days. My husband has the same problems.
Take care. Love from Christine


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
Thank you all for the messages of support.

John is slightly better today, but still not 'with it', and very wobbly on his legs. I went in and fed him breakfast, and again for lunch. I'll go back again at tea time. They said I needn't, they'd feed him, and I know they would, but there are fewer staff on at weekends, and I prefer to do it while he's so ill.

Yhey haven't managed to get a urine sample from him -- same problem as when he was in hospital. But they're going to ring our own GP tomorrow and see what he suggests. Unfortunately, the broad-spectrum antibiotic didn't work last time.

I'm afraid I panicked last night. I was straight back to the horrors of the weekend before he went to hospital. It has convinced me he's in the right place, though. If he'd been at home, he'd have been back in hospital yesterday.

It was good to be able to talk to you, and have your support, so many, many thanks.

Love to all,

fearful fiona

Registered User
Apr 19, 2007
Dear Hazel,

Thinking of you too, glad he's a bit better. I know how reassuring it is when loved ones are in the right place, at least the professional help is on hand and there is no disruption of getting them to hospital.


Registered User
Jun 29, 2007
North Wales
Dear Hazel,

Fingers crossed for better news.

Even though it helps you to know that you made the right decision, it must be tearing you apart.

Love to you both,


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
I'm afraid the improvement didn't last. When I went in at tea time he was back to square one. To make matters worse, the aggression is back.

I just hope the GP can come up with something that works tomorrow. There was nothing hehind John's eyes tonight, and that hurts so much.

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