Thanks
@Woo2 @Jaded'n'faded @Bikerbeth xxx
I did think of doing that
@Woo2 and should have done really. I almost did, when she went out to washing line I thought I'll just get fan out of cupboard and put it on and fib and say I thought she'd told me to when I'd mentioned it, but on the odd occasion we put it on it's very rare that she doesn't constantly moan about it annoying her and being noisy and I just couldn't be bothered listening to her moan about it, I wasn't too bad where I was sat so I left it where it was. I did mention it couple of times but got same answer of It annoys me, so I just said So does being hot, I suppose it depends which annoys you most the heat or the fan. Mum said Fan so I left it where it was.
Mum did drink a bit of her water from her morning tablets while OT was there this morning. All that telling him about her husband who'd just left and her mum who'd just died and telling him I wasn't her daughter and I lied and made out she was mental must have made her thirsty.
I also got her some fresh one of the times I refilled mine and she drank a bit cos when she was saying she was warm one time I said have drink of your water cos its cold, but mostly its just been tea again and coke at dinnertime. She's always been the same with drinks.
Years ago (before dementia) mum was having trouble with her waterworks and was referred to a local clinic, she had to write down what she drank and measure her wee. They told her she wasn't drinking enough and also that she should wait till needed go to loo and wait to make sure finished rather than rush off. We went back after while and mums trouble had gone as she was going to loo better but they still thought she didn't really drink enough water. I had tried and kept telling mum that so I told them I'd been trying to get her to drink water, I drink a few glasses a day but mum doesn't really have it and she said Least you tried love but you can take your mum to water but you can't make her drink. It gave us a laugh at the time and I'm afraid though I do mention drinking water and drinking more to mum I don't make a big thing over it really.
@Jaded'n'faded That does sound very like my mum. It's mind boggling some times I often feel like my head is going to explode with trying to keep up with all the things she comes up with and I'm drained by the time I get home on a night and can't concentrate on much, even tv if we watch it has to be simple most of the time. Especially when on red alert that mum might call in middle of it. I'm more pooper woman than superwoman though as usually feel like poop and feel like doing poop job.
I am actually quite pleased with myself
@Bikerbeth that I was quick thinking enough today to distract mum from going off on one at me over talking to OT at door. She was looked at me very grumpy faced when I walked back in and had got her address book on her knee, probably looking for my phone number. I just rabbited on about OT stripping off his pinny etc outside and how horrid it must be in this heat having mask and plastic gloves on while grinning at her like a loon and soon she was laughing and smiling and had forgot she was mad. I'm not often that quick to think of something like that but today I was lucky.
Had 4 calls from mum tonight. The last one at 25 past 10 Mum asked if I was at home I said yes, she said was I ok and I said I was then she asked if W (my dad) was there I said no. Mum said Oh, mind you its only 25 past 10 he'll be at pub still he should be back later so will you be alright? I said Oh yes I'm fine and then mum told me she'd been at her mums house, well it was her house but she'd let her mum have it and she'd not come back home yet but it was bit late now so would I be ok there at home and she'd come back tomorrow? I said Yes I'm fine, you stay there tonight and I'll see you tomorrow. She asked me if I was locked up, I said I was and asked if she was and mum said yes she was, Mum said I think W will be back soon he usually sets off back about 11. I said Yes ok. She asked if I'd be ok there on my own and I said Yes I was fine I'll see her tomorrow. Mum said Ok I'll come back in the morning, I came to see my mum I thought she'd be here but she's not so I'll stay in her bed tonight and come back up in morning. So I said Yes you do that I'll see you tomorrow. Then she said Ok love I'll see you tomorrow night night. She must have thought I'm only a kid and we all still live together.
The first two calls tonight were a bit bizarre, they were hard to figure out what she was talking about so I could come up with answers and the third one she was asking where I was. .
The first call tonight was around 8 when she asked me You know that house we were staying in well I haven't got the keys for it. I came back here today I think it was with you or it might have been our Andrea but I'm not sure what I did with the keys cos I can't find them Do you know where I put them? Did I lock up? Then she said Maybe she'd posted them through the letterbox. She said she'd been all through her coat pockets, bag and purse but didn't have the keys. I wasn't exactly sure what she was meaning really and what her worry was and it took me a while to come up with something to say but I told her she only had her keys for the house she was at now, she would have locked other house and put keys through letterbox. Then mum said But he might not be able to get in if I've locked it. I said Who? and mum said W I don't know where he's living but if he wants to get in and I've locked it he won't be able to get in and it's his house. I said He'll have his own keys if its his house and he's living there so don't worry about it. Mum said Oh aye he will won't he. I said Yeah so he'll be fine don't worry about it its sorted. She said Ok then love night night.
The second call at 20 to 9 was even more confusing to work out, mum was asking me who had been with her earlier when she'd come there. A girl about 16 she thought, maybe a relative, was it me or am I older, I told her I'd been there with her today. Mum thought it was another person, had someone else been there with us, she thought there was a girl and that she was looking after her where she was before, that she'd been staying with mum and mum was looking after her at other house before she had come back to this house but maybe she was mixed up. I said maybe a bit, mum said maybe she'd been asleep and thinking about a story thing, but then said But I keep thinking a girl was here, maybe a relative, I knew her. I said Yes maybe you dreamed it. I wasn't really sure what she was on about so tried to find excuses for it to settle her. I said I was there earlier and we were talking about when I was young so it could be me she was thinking of. We'd also been talking about taking sisters kids to seaside and holidays cos I had some old photos on my facebook memories I'd shown mum this afternoon from a day at seaside with them and we'd talked about that day and also about us taking niece and nephew to butlins once so I said we were talking earlier about that. Mum said she could have got it wrong she is going bit daft. I told her she wasn't daft but sometimes I nod off and dream about things I've talked about or seen and remember it when I wake up so it could be that, She said it could be and then I tried change subject but mum went back to it and said I wonder who it was and where she is though, or am I going mental and mixing it up. I said it she wasn't mental but she might be getting a bit tired and mixing things we'd talked about up especially if she'd been nodding but it wasn't anything to worry about. She said Ok love your probably right. Then she asked if I was ok, where I was and with who, was I married to him and did she come to wedding. I told her yes and she looked lovely and described her outfit and talked bit about wedding which seemed to distract her and she asked if she could look at our photos sometime and I said yes course you can I can show you tomorrow if you like, mum said yes and then said see you tomorrow then love and night night.
The third call at 20 past 9 Mum asked where I was and when I said at home she asked whose home, so I said mine and she asked where it was and if I was with someone and when I said -(hubby) she said oh good you could have stayed here with me but if you've got someone that's ok. Then she said Ok then love I'll see you later night night.
She was confused on each call, not making a lot of sense, but wasn't really upset. She obviously feels something is wrong and she's not sure she's in right place though. Which is sad and scary.