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  1. Q&A: "Loneliness and isolation" - Tuesday 30 Oct, 2-3pm

    Are you experiencing loneliness and isolation? Do you care for someone with dementia or have dementia yourself? We are here to answer your questions on this emotive topic. Our next expert Q&A will be hosted by Anne from our Helpline team. She will be answering your questions on Tuesday 30 October from 2-3pm. Want to ask questions in advance, or don’t think you can make it? You can either post questions here or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on Tuesday 30th of October from 2-3 pm.

    Pop by and post your questions now and we'll answer them on Tuesday.

Welcome to Talking Point - introduce yourself here

Discussion in 'Welcome and how to use Talking Point' started by Mark_W, May 29, 2018.

  1. Mark_W

    Mark_W Administrator
    Staff Member

    Sep 28, 2015
    3,424
    London
    Welcome to Talking Point :)

    This thread is for all our new members to say hello and tell us a little bit about yourself. For example, about your connection to dementia and your reasons for joining.

    Just click on the blue "Reply to Thread" button above this post, type your message and click the blue "Post Reply" button to make your first post.

    If you've got questions about how to use Talking Point click on these links below.
    • You can find answers to frequently asked questions here.
    • Our Help videos will show you how to navigate the different areas of Talking Point.
    • We also have a Quick Guide explaining how to use Talking Point including logging in, posting, replying, checking private messages and searching.
    • Also we recommend having a read through our Guidelines which are some useful tips and things to remember when posting.
    If you just want to know how to post your own thread please read on.

    Posting on a small screen
    (Click on the images to enlarge them)

    Firstly click this link to see a list of our forums: https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk

    Then scroll down and chose the most appropriate forum by clicking on it's name.

    Forum List Mobile.PNG

    When you're in a forum, click on the blue "Post New Thread" button.

    Forum List Mobile.PNG

    Then, type a title, add your message and click 'Create Thread'.

    Post New Thread Mobile.png

    Posting on a big screen
    (Click on the images to enlarge them)

    Firstly click this link to see a list of our forums: https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk

    Then scroll down and chose the most appropriate forum by clicking on it's name.

    Forum List.png

    When you're in a forum, click on the blue "Post New Thread" button.

    Forums.png

    Then, type a title, add your message and click 'Create Thread'.

    Post New Thread.png

    If you have any questions about using the forum, please don't hesitate to contact the Talking Point team as we're here to help.

    We hope you find Talking Point helpful.
     

    Attached Files:

  2. Vox

    Vox New member

    May 29, 2018
    1
    My husband is 82 and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's two years ago. Our lives have become very restricted but if we keep to the expected routine we manage pretty well. He has begun not wanting to get up in the morning and sometimes spends the whole day in bed. We had an old dog to whom he was very devoted who died at the end of April, and after that he more often didn't get up. We have applied to rehouse a retired guide dog, and this has proved a good motivator but he still has days when he doesn't get up. Is this a feature of the disease?
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    66,892
    Kent
    Hello @Vox Welcome to Talking Point

    Your husband could be suffering from depression following the loss of his dog and his diagnosis or it could be something completely different.

    I`m sure you will get lots of good advice and support here.

    Now you have introduced yourself, please start your own Thread in the sub forum I have a partner with dementia all your replies will be together.

    https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-have-a-partner-with-dementia.69/
     
  4. Manc70

    Manc70 Registered User

    May 30, 2018
    87
    Female
    S. Yorkshire
    Hi, am very new at putting my feelings etc in writing and finding it very hard but something I need to do. Spend so much time putting on a “brave face” and screaming inside. We’ve had a difficult few years with my 70 yr old husband finally having a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s.
     
  5. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    4,754
    Male
    Bristol
    Welcome to TP @Manc70. You will get plenty support here and if you want to scream or rant then we understand where you are coming from. Take your time to find your way round the forums and post anything you need to on "I care for someone with Dementia" when you are ready. Look for the blue box "Post a new thread" at the top of the page. You will need to click on "create thread" and tick the box to watch thread when you are finished. Good luck and best wishes, R
     
  6. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    57,184
    Female
    Dundee
    Hi @Manc70 and welcome to Talking Point.

    I'm glad you found the forum. Putting a brave face on it isn't always easy and this is a great place to get things off your chest. Now you've introduced yourself you might want to think about starting your own thread. It can be a place to share your concerns, ask questions - or just jet off steam! Just go to the I Have A Partner with Dementia area of the forum and click on the post a new thread button -

    https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-have-a-partner-with-dementia.69/

    Looking forward to seeing you around.

    Edit - oops - cross posted with nellbelles!
     
  7. Manc70

    Manc70 Registered User

    May 30, 2018
    87
    Female
    S. Yorkshire
    Thank you
     
  8. Teapot47

    Teapot47 New member

    May 29, 2018
    2
    Hi, I joined because my mum passed away six weeks ago, shortly after being diagnosed with the latter stages of vascular dementia, which she'd managed to hide well. She'd had a stroke just over two years ago and, despite also having septicaemia a few months later, coped incredibly well. It's only from the end of last summer that she grew more fragile. Even then we had no idea about the dementia. It was only when she was hospitalised after a series of falls from late Jan this year that the diagnosis was made. I'm so lost. I've got so many questions and I don't know how to deal with what's happened.
     
  9. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    6,447
    Yorkshire
  10. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    4,754
    Male
    Bristol
    Welcome to TP @Teapot47, and condolences on the loss of your mother. Shedrech said the rest of what I was going to write, so I'll leave you in peace to find your way around.
     
  11. Kinikins

    Kinikins New member

    May 25, 2018
    1
    This is my first attemp on here.
    My husband has dementia and was diagnosed 18 months ago his memory is often only seconds.
    We have been married 61 years
    .I’m not able to leave him on his own.
    I miss not being to have a normal conversation with him anymore or just shareing my thoughts like I used to do.
    Its very hard sometimes always to be patient loving and kind.
    We are fortunate though to have good health although he doesn’t like to walk very far.
    We don’t go on holidays anymore as he can’t cope with waking up in a strange place.
     
  12. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    7,756
    leicester
    Hello @Kinikins welcome to TP

    Yes sometimes the world seems to shrink when dementia is part of the equation.
    Would it help for you to have someone to sit with your husband so you could meet up perhaps with a friend for coffee and a chat.
    The alzheimers society and AgeUK run schemes in many parts of the country.
    Your husband is very fortunate to have you caring for him
     
  13. Teapot47

    Teapot47 New member

    May 29, 2018
    2
    Thanks Shedrech and nae sporran for your kind words.
     
  14. Sally-Bone

    Sally-Bone New member

    May 26, 2018
    2
    Hi my name is Sally and this is my first time on here. My dad has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and is slowly deteriorating. I have so any questions about what is going to happen and how we cope with it, thank you and I look forward to helping other as well if I can.
     
  15. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    57,184
    Female
    Dundee
    Hi @Sally-Bone and welcome to the forum. I’m glad you’ve found us and I’m sure you’ll get lots of help and support here.

    Once you’ve had a look around you might want to start your own thread. You can post questions, share concerns or just get things off your chest if you like. That way all of your replies will be in one place.

    Just go to the I Care For A Person With Dementia area of the forum and click on ‘new thread’ That will be you ready to go.

    https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-care-for-a-person-with-dementia.70/
     
  16. Myo

    Myo New member

    Jun 1, 2018
    6
    Female
    Hampshire
    Hi, I joined because I am the main carer for my mum who has vascular dementia. I often feel lost / frightened ( are they the right words?) and need to talk to someone else who understands dementia and what it's like for someone to live with and to care for someone. Advice please
    Mum has a marked deterioration in last 3weeks and now just wants to stay in bed, sleeping 90% of the time not eating but thankfully drinking with encouragement otherwise seems content. I just want to understand if there is more I can do for her, will mum regain interest, appetite is it just best to accept this is where she wants to be?
     
  17. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    4,754
    Male
    Bristol
    Welcome to TP Myo. You will find plenty of support and advice here. I don't have experience of the kind of decline your mum is suffering. Have you had a doctor out to see if there is something else causing it. My OH had a chest infection in February which badly affected her appetite.
    Sorry you are felling lost and frightened, but sadly that is a normal part of the caring role. Many of us are grieving what the person we once knew and feeling powerless to do anything about it, but we can only do our best in the circumstances.
     
  18. Luckylisa

    Luckylisa Registered User

    Jun 1, 2018
    23
    Hi I'm new to the forum. My Mum is 80 and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's 12 years ago. My Dad died from cancer 6 years ago and that was terrible and I used the Macmillan forum. With Mum we have been through some very difficult times and her dementia advanced greatly when Dad died making her attempt suicide. She has been in a fantastic home for three years and although for so long has been a stranger in my Mums body she has still enjoyed my company and I have loved spending time with her. We have hugged a lot and she always lit up when I arrived even though she didn't know my name. Two weeks ago she suddenly deteriorated and can barely talk, doesn't eat and can't stand or walk. The home say she only has weeks. I thought I might feel some relief as the end of this horrific endless journey may soon be over, but I don't. I just feel so desperately sad for her and for me. I can't even cry now. I used to cry so easily but I've become so accostomed to putting on a brace face that I can't show how I feel anymore. People ask how she is but they are bored of the topic , she STILL has dementia, it's not so bad they think. Just venting and looking for anyone in the same situation.
     
  19. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    7,194
    Female
    South coast
    Hello @Luckylisa and welcome to Talking Point.

    I remember my mums last few weeks. She had been in a care home for 3 years too and I used to love taking her out spending time with her. You know in your head that this time is coming, but it takes a while for your emotions to catch up when that time arrives. I felt I was living in limboland, a sort of twighlight zone when you dont know how long its all going to take. Remember that even if she cant speak she will still be able to hear, so talk to her, read to her and play her favourite music. You can also make her more comfortable by putting moisturising cream on her face and skin and lip salve on her lips.

    If you would like to start a new thread on the end of life forum https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/end-of-life-care.73/ you will find that many people who have been through this will support you during this time
    (((((hugs)))))
     
  20. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    7,756
    leicester
    Hi @Luckylisa welcome to TP
    I see from your post you have used the Macmillan forum, so I am glad you have found us, we are a very supportive group with a wealth of experience in the world of Alzheimer’s and Dementia.
    I’m sorry that it appears your Mum is possibly at end of life care, but she still needs your love and support and you need support to do this I hope we can help you with this.
    Please keep posting so we can help
     

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