Today

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
75,068
0
73
Dundee
Well this was yesterday not today but in the evening - out of the blue OH looked directly at me and says “thank you”. Smiling I said that’s nice, thank you too, but what for - “looking after me”. Brought tears to my eyes. And this morning I have been out (do talking newspaper reading twice a month), and come back to find he’s washed and dried the dishes. Strange after complete disappearance of empathy a couple of years ago that recently it’s returned. I’m appreciating and enjoying.

How lovely @Knitandpurl. That must mean so much to you.
 

Knitandpurl

Registered User
Aug 9, 2021
860
0
Lincolnshire
Currently I am set on a Ward waiting for OH yo come back from theatre. He is having his haemorrhoids removed. The hospital as l has been great , even let me go down to the theatre with him, I felt dreadful leaving him there, he looked so lost. They are giving him an epidural rather than general anaesthetic so hopefully will not make his dementia any worse, though rapid decline since we got here this morning. Think it’s just over tiredness. I am very anxious about how he is going to manage tonight as he has to stay in, but at the same time am really looking forward to an evening and night of no responsibility. Such mixed feelings. Will be glad when he’s back on the Ward, this is worse than when the children were small.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
24,668
0
Southampton
Currently I am set on a Ward waiting for OH yo come back from theatre. He is having his haemorrhoids removed. The hospital as l has been great , even let me go down to the theatre with him, I felt dreadful leaving him there, he looked so lost. They are giving him an epidural rather than general anaesthetic so hopefully will not make his dementia any worse, though rapid decline since we got here this morning. Think it’s just over tiredness. I am very anxious about how he is going to manage tonight as he has to stay in, but at the same time am really looking forward to an evening and night of no responsibility. Such mixed feelings. Will be glad when he’s back on the Ward, this is worse than when the children were small.
ouch!! hopefully he will be back soon. have you planned anything for your night of freedom. is there aftercare you need to do? enjoy your me time.
 

Knitandpurl

Registered User
Aug 9, 2021
860
0
Lincolnshire
He’s still not back, 2.5 hours now am trying to stay calm. When I get home I am planning on my daughter coming over (he doesn’t like that on an evening) and also bringing her gorgeous dog - dogs not allowed in our house (he was bitten as a child and really dislikes/frightened off). Think he is going to have a few weeks of considerable pain and toileting showering going to be awkward, keeping everything crossed it is going to be worth it.
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
7,396
0
Nottinghamshire
Hope your husband is back on the ward very soon and you can have an enjoyable evening with your daughter and dog. I hope the post-operative period isn't too trying.
 

Blissy

Registered User
Jan 29, 2023
174
0
Oh...a nights uninterrupted sleep I would guess. What bliss! Having said that I understand you are going to be anxious about your husband having to stay overnight. From experience I know how hard it is to leave when they are looking lost and just want you there. Enjoy your evening and I hope post op recovery goes well.
 

Knitandpurl

Registered User
Aug 9, 2021
860
0
Lincolnshire
Well been a bit busy ….. but update now, OH dozing beside me on sofa holding on to my hand!! It was over 5 hours before they brought him back from Recovery Ward. I was going out my mind. Apparently he had a rectal prolapse and his haemorrhoids were so large they couldn’t remove them all as no skin left to stitch together (if only they’d done them 3 years ago when we first saw consultant, they were massive then). I had a wonderful nights sleep, even read in bed (not normally allowed). Was just going down for breakfast when he rang demanding I come in straight away. Anyway they decided he was well enough to discharge so we back home by lunchtime. He’s slept mostly since then in between the pad, clothes changing and showering. Hopefully start to feel better over the next few days.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
24,668
0
Southampton
Well been a bit busy ….. but update now, OH dozing beside me on sofa holding on to my hand!! It was over 5 hours before they brought him back from Recovery Ward. I was going out my mind. Apparently he had a rectal prolapse and his haemorrhoids were so large they couldn’t remove them all as no skin left to stitch together (if only they’d done them 3 years ago when we first saw consultant, they were massive then). I had a wonderful nights sleep, even read in bed (not normally allowed). Was just going down for breakfast when he rang demanding I come in straight away. Anyway they decided he was well enough to discharge so we back home by lunchtime. He’s slept mostly since then in between the pad, clothes changing and showering. Hopefully start to feel better over the next few days.
at least some are done and you have him home again. ooohhh reading in bed, what luxury! i try and fall asleep before ive reached the end of the page these days.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
82,332
0
Kent
I was sorry to read about this @Knitandpurl but pleased the surgery is over and your OH seems to be recovering.

It hit home when you said waiting for him to come out of surgery was just like waiting for the children.
 

Knitandpurl

Registered User
Aug 9, 2021
860
0
Lincolnshire
Thank you Grannie G. Poor thing is still in a lot of pain and still bleeding. He’s let me have a look this morning after shower, and then gone back to bed.
 

Knitandpurl

Registered User
Aug 9, 2021
860
0
Lincolnshire
Think it’s all too raw. However- hospital had suggested sitz bath, which bit took to mean salt baths. Hadn’t done as worried about safety of getting OH in and out of bath, and also he has a multi resistant urinary tract infection which has very nearly killed hi 3 times and I was very concerned about sitting in bath setting this off. Then today after some topping and doing texting with my daughter she brought a commode round and I gave used this to give him ‘bum’ salt bath twice. So hoping this will help the healing. She is also ordering a ‘donut’ cushion and perinatal ice packs for us (she has Amazon Prime so can get next day delivery without costing a fortune), so when they arrive am going to try them. All this has had a dreadful impact on his dementia, he has really really struggled today, unable to do things he usually can. I could cry for him.
 

Suzysheep01

Registered User
Jan 14, 2023
218
0
I’m so sorry to hear about your husband. I’ve had this operation and it is the worst thing I’ve ever experienced ( I’ve birthed 3 babies)
a sitz bath is a little bowl that fits over the toilet. You fill it with warm water and sit in it. It’s very soothing. You can get them on Amazon.
try not to wipe his bum, just rinse off in the sitz bath….. or even sit him on the edge of the bath and shower his bum off. Gently dry after with a hairdryer on low heat, then apply what ever cream has been prescribed. Don’t forget to keep up with the painkillers. Something like lactose for a couple of weeks too will really help.
 

Knitandpurl

Registered User
Aug 9, 2021
860
0
Lincolnshire
I can remember when after an operation you automatically got aftercare from the NHS with a District Nurse popping round to make sure you were doing everything you should and healing ok, they were wonderful IN the hospital but even the explanations/instructions, what to expect on discharge were sadly lacking. Thank you for the Sitz explanation, am doing now and his improvement since this morning is amazing. However they didn’t give me or recommend any creams, having been using Savlon but avoiding the actual open wounds. Thanks also for the hair dryer suggestion. If you don’t mind me asking how long was it before the bleeding stopped? He had the operation on Tuesday afternoon and there is still a constant dribble of blood.
 

Knitandpurl

Registered User
Aug 9, 2021
860
0
Lincolnshire
Thank you, phone call to doctor first thing tomorrow then. I’ve never found 111 useful, and am not taking him back to the hospital unless absolutely desperate, he’s currently ‘watching’ the snooker.