So is this it...?

TNJJ

Registered User
May 7, 2019
1,049
cornwall
My lovely TP family, thank you for the lovely thoughts & words.
I am strangely calm & thankful that Dad is no longer in the grips of dementia.
My Mum is amazingly strong of character & losing her soul mate must be unimaginable without the issues of dementia. Yet today the clarity of mind Mum presented was amazing. I’m sure some difficult days lie ahead but for today I comforted Mum; & then she comforted me her daughter.

The hardest thing wasn’t telling people,it was the delight on the faces & in the voices of those I visited & called to break the news. I never realised how much I’m Dads daughter - talking about Dads exploits

old work colleagues are sourcing fake plastic bananas
Dad had a banana everyday in his lunch box it was a running joke among his work mates to substitute itfor the fake one!
Another friend of Dads ( he crewed yachts & sailed - even making onto TV news !!) is digging out photos & newspaper clippings of one of Dads mercy mission dashes!

walking & drinking buddies have tales to curl your hair & leave you laughing holding your sides!

friends of Mums tell of random acts of kindness- Dad dug one lady a grave for her cat un-asked; after a 12 hour shift at work.

as for My lovely Aunty ( Dads sister ) I stared into the same colour eyes as Dad & felt loved & cherished; tears & laughter followed but more laughter than tears.

what a legacy Dad leaves behind, so tonight when I get home please raise a glass or cup of whatever & toast my lovely Dad- Peter with me. A gentle man .

much love to you all
Will be hopefully back on the forum in a couple of days
Xx
Bless you! That had me smiling and crying..Love to you and your family..((( hugs))) Tracey X
 

Dimpsy

Registered User
Sep 2, 2019
1,022
You are a force of nature @DesperateofDevon, here's to Peter, may he rest in peace and I'm raising my mug of camomile tea to you for your stubbornness, hanging in there when others would have given in, positivity and sheer passion for making life the best possible for your loved ones. Slainte!
 

Tea and. toast

Registered User
May 8, 2019
54
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Some Bowl of Beauty Peonies for you to Desperate of Devon. I shall raise a glass of Proper Job beer from near your part of the world, to your wonderful Dad who was cared for by an amazing daughter. Take care.x
 

anxious annie

Registered User
Jan 2, 2019
248
I've just caught up with reading as have been away for a few days. Sending love and hugs and wishing you strength in the days ahead xx
 

Fishgirl

Registered User
Sep 9, 2019
134
I'll be raising a glass to your dad and mine too who died this Sunday last year x
Well I’ll have to make do with a wine glass full of blackcurrent cordial:( and a bit of make believe, but here’s to both of them flying high.xxxx
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
2,509
Thank you everyone, the emotional rollercoaster of tears & laughter is exhausting. Formalities begin tomorrow,

I’m an emotional 5 hour clock, daughter & OH can predict next bout of tears!! ( so pleased to oblige!!)

Have picked out photos as am sure that I’m going to hit that exhaustion wall very soon.
The love & support on TP has kept me sane
Thank you
Hoping that I’ll be able to return that support in the near future
Xx
 

jugglingmum

Registered User
Jan 5, 2014
5,504
Chester
So sorry to hear this, but so glad your dad is pain free.

You fought bravely for your dad and did him proud xxx

(not been on TP much the last few days so only just seen this)
 

Moggymad

Registered User
May 12, 2017
458
Thank you everyone, the emotional rollercoaster of tears & laughter is exhausting. Formalities begin tomorrow,

I’m an emotional 5 hour clock, daughter & OH can predict next bout of tears!! ( so pleased to oblige!!)

Have picked out photos as am sure that I’m going to hit that exhaustion wall very soon.
The love & support on TP has kept me sane
Thank you
Hoping that I’ll be able to return that support in the near future
Xx
Take your time @DesperateofDevon just post as & when ready. I found to start with I was very clear thinking for a few days, then whoosh complete mush. I didn't even get dressed some days. Like you say you hit a wall. Grief is very strange its like being in a car crash but with no visible injuries but inside you're all broken up. Time will heal. Sending big hugs & lots of support. X
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
2,509
Take your time @DesperateofDevon just post as & when ready. I found to start with I was very clear thinking for a few days, then whoosh complete mush. I didn't even get dressed some days. Like you say you hit a wall. Grief is very strange its like being in a car crash but with no visible injuries but inside you're all broken up. Time will heal. Sending big hugs & lots of support. X
Very eloquently put, & on the button.
Had a lovely friend of Dads just ring & im still smiling from the tales of exploits that I’d forgotten.

I really was a Daddy’s girl, my Dads little shadow - usually covered in grease taking things apart with him or his companion on trips to help or visit friends or family.

my poor Mum was well & truly ousted during my waking hours of childhood!

It makes me appreciate her generosity in allowing Dad to be close by to me this past year. I’m actually appreciating Mums situation more.

I’m determined to not have PJ days but do something that I would have talked to Dad about, however mundane or trivial!
My garden will be well tended, & I’m looking for wildlife & taking a moment to do so. Simple pleasures that bring. joy
Xx
 

Dimpsy

Registered User
Sep 2, 2019
1,022
Very eloquently put, & on the button.
Had a lovely friend of Dads just ring & im still smiling from the tales of exploits that I’d forgotten.

I really was a Daddy’s girl, my Dads little shadow - usually covered in grease taking things apart with him or his companion on trips to help or visit friends or family.

my poor Mum was well & truly ousted during my waking hours of childhood!

It makes me appreciate her generosity in allowing Dad to be close by to me this past year. I’m actually appreciating Mums situation more.

I’m determined to not have PJ days but do something that I would have talked to Dad about, however mundane or trivial!
My garden will be well tended, & I’m looking for wildlife & taking a moment to do so. Simple pleasures that bring. joy
Xx
Have a scout around your garden @DesperateofDevon, I've spotted daffodil greenery poking through already in sheltered spots; the thought of spring on the way gets me through the dreary, dark days of winter.
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
2,509
Who knew so much paperwork so many processes existed related to someone’s passing!

I am handing the executorship over to the lovely solicitor who sorted out the LPA. I’m done with forms etc & am going to just be the daughter.

the LPA has made things so much easier, but still ...
hoping Dad will be repatriated today xx