Hubby going into CH for respite
- Thread starter pamann
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Isn't it lovely to be able to sleep peacefully, Pamann. I'm so glad you did. Howz it going today, so far, with you? You all right?
Hello chuggs, phoned CH hubby is not good won't eat, would not go to bed, will not take his clothes off, will not wash or shave, wandering day and night, keeps talking to the man in the windows, (his own reflection doesn't recognise himself) they have put pills in his drinks, l knew he would be like this, l have had it for weeks. He will not let them unpack his clothes, l was lucky enough that he let me pack them. Any suggestions
Sorry to hear that Pam but like tpers say do let the care home deal with it and try not to worry . Sending huge hugs xxxxx
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Pamann, this is why you need the respite - so please do what others have said and let the staff take the strain.
It is important that they see his behaviour and that it is documented for any further support you may need. If it's what you were seeing at home then certainly don't rush in and try to help - the respite is for YOU to recuperate.
If at all possible, twist the phone calling around - ask them to phone you only if they need to update you - if things are pretty much as you expect, let them leave you in peace. You know what he is like, do you need constant reminding?
[I know easier said than done]
From what you have written the staff are finding ways to help him, which is encouraging and means you have found a good home for him for now.
Am facing something similar this week with dad in his care home - but I know I MUST step back or I will be no good to myself or him. I am lucky, I trust the staff to get on and to contact me when they know it is necessary, but leave me be when they can.
Very best wishes!
Oh, sweetie it must be so hard, but if that behaviour is what you have been coping with then you can't possibly go on without at least a temporary break.
I hope the CH can find a way to calm him down but it may take a while.
Wise words from Shedrech as well as others. For your husband's sake as well as yours you need to find a way to rest. I so hope you can. Lots of love and a big hug to you.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Pam, if anything bad happens, they will contact you. This respite is for you. It is one chance to recharge batteries without anything getting in the way. When my OH went into respite the first time ( cos I had carer breakdown) I went away to stay with a cousin. Over 6 hours travelling allows a certain perspective on things.
To be fair, we have spent time apart at least once a year, including OU summer courses, my job, and hospital stays, so I can't envisage your scenario.
Meanwhile, when you go to bed, wrap yourself in all our hugs and sleep well!
((((Hugs)))))
To be fair, we have spent time apart at least once a year, including OU summer courses, my job, and hospital stays, so I can't envisage your scenario.
Meanwhile, when you go to bed, wrap yourself in all our hugs and sleep well!
((((Hugs)))))
Pamann, do feel for you it's so hard but the carers will cope and they get to go home at the end of their shift and rest. You can't give that level of care 24/7 without a break. Please try and make the most of it. Is there no-one else who can phone for you? Big hug Xxxxxxx
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Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
Hello Jinx and everyone, my hubby has not eaten for 3 days, he is still walking around, won't go to bed so no sleep, he is still fully dressed, and carrying his bag and clothes around with him, today refuses Medication, he is drinking, they are waiting for to collapse and just fall asleep for 24hrs, they have never had anyone like my hubby, and they will never have anyone else like him again, he is a one off!!!! He only sits down for 5mins how can a 76yr old carry on like this, if he dies how will l feel devastated!!!! Any suggestions
