Alzheimer's symptoms
- Thread starter Alister
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- alzheimer's disease
Throat clearing and difficulty with swallowing are not usually early symptoms so more likely to be a physical problem. My Mum had to have her throat ‘stretched’ as it had narrowed due to scar tissue from years of acid reflux. This helped her swallowing considerably. She did later develop dementia but that was years later following a bad fall.
That's the problem, I have highlighted my concerns but he seems to be in denial about what is happening. He seems agitated quite a bit, looks like he is confused when you talk to him, he has been moody, problems remembering recently learnt information. Has started to repeat questions. There is too many red flags in my mind, other members of the family have noticed but I know he won't see a doctor.
Might it be worth emailing his GP with your concerns? This works for us, but then my parents have an amazing surgery.
When my family get concerned about a new issue or escalating behaviour, I email Mum’s GP outlining the things which concern us, and pointing out that she wouldn’t cooperate with any kind of appointment where dementia or memory problems are mentioned. Her GP surgery is brilliant, and send her an invitation for ‘a routine checkup’. Mum will attend that happily, basic checks like blood pressure can be done (always helpful as she has a range of physical conditions), and the dementia-related questions can be slipped in quietly and sympathetically. Meds can be tweaked if necessary and the GP can keep a safeguarding eye on her general wellbeing.
You can see his doctor on his behalf. The doctor may not wish to discuss but they will listen and recommend further action.
I did this with my mother. Her doctor listened and made no comment other than `Leave it with me'
He then called her to the surgery for an overall health check up.
I might give that a try, but my dad is an extremely private man and extreme caution must be taken.
I am having the same issues with my husband who will not see the doctor. He has given me permission to speak to gp on his behalf. I have made an appointment for him to see the gp about my concerns with his short term memory, confusion and obsessive compulsive behaviour at night about security. I have emailed my concerns to the gp prior to the appointment . I have told him he bas been called for a well man clinic. Dreading the appt next week. He does not believe he has a problem and is not very compliant.
Your husband has given you permission @Jan48 so deep down he knows something is wrong.
I hope he attends for the appointment but don’t worry too much if he backs out at the last minute. My husband was a nightmare to get to the doctors. When I phoned the surgery to tell them they were very understanding.
The reluctance was fear I’m sure.
Fingers crossed for you
I hope he attends for the appointment but don’t worry too much if he backs out at the last minute. My husband was a nightmare to get to the doctors. When I phoned the surgery to tell them they were very understanding.
The reluctance was fear I’m sure.
Fingers crossed for you
Dear All,
I have a further question for anyone who reads this Forum. I was diagnosed in July of last year. I ask because I have never confronted this question personally. I am aware of my losses since beginning to learn what was going wrong with me. My questions are two:
How can I help my wife deal with my losses?
How can I honestly come to terms with having Alzheimer’s and experiencing those losses which are present and those that will come.
I am finding my way.
The Long Goodbye ad made me think about this issue.
David Joseph
I have a further question for anyone who reads this Forum. I was diagnosed in July of last year. I ask because I have never confronted this question personally. I am aware of my losses since beginning to learn what was going wrong with me. My questions are two:
How can I help my wife deal with my losses?
How can I honestly come to terms with having Alzheimer’s and experiencing those losses which are present and those that will come.
I am finding my way.
The Long Goodbye ad made me think about this issue.
David Joseph
Hello @David Joseph
Firstly my highest respect to you for trying to confront your diagnosis and help your wife deal with what you are losing
There are no guidelines to dealing with such a challenging situation All you can do is try to keep yourself as healthy as possible and be open and honest about your feelings The same applies to your wife She needs to stay well and not be afraid to share her feelings too
It`s all about communication I believe as long as you talk to each other you will get the best out of your day to day living. Try not to think too far ahead. No one knows what tomorrow will bring so make the most of today.
Firstly my highest respect to you for trying to confront your diagnosis and help your wife deal with what you are losing
There are no guidelines to dealing with such a challenging situation All you can do is try to keep yourself as healthy as possible and be open and honest about your feelings The same applies to your wife She needs to stay well and not be afraid to share her feelings too
It`s all about communication I believe as long as you talk to each other you will get the best out of your day to day living. Try not to think too far ahead. No one knows what tomorrow will bring so make the most of today.
What a brave gentleman you are. Would you consider writing an open letter to your wife? This could be read time and time again.
One silly day I thought what if I get dementia same as my mum?
I wrote an open letter to my kids , goes like this
Firstly know I love you all you have been great kids
Sorry about the big D. Sucks for me and you.
Be aware I will always try to be the best version of myself at anyone time but know it might not always seem so.
I may be frightened and I may be lonely. Help where you can as I have helped you and your children growing up. However I DO NOT want my care to wreck your lives feel free to out source.
I have completed LPA s and done the will. There is in case of emergency folder with details of finance pass words etc.
Ever the pragmatist me. You may want to speak more about love and feelings?
Good to have real me on record I felt.
Good luck to you sir.
Dear SherwoodSue,
What a brilliant idea. Many thanks. I will start composing a letter like that to my wife, and will deliver it once I feel the slightest twinge of my behaviour changing in a more difficult way.
My wife was with me for my second interview with the Consultant Psychogeriatrician, and when later when I was tested by a research neurologist for a research study on Insight in dementia sufferers, and in both cases participated by disclosing the losses I had shown in activities of daily living and other
behavioural problems.
From the start I was uncomfortably aware of my initial losses, and I was shocked by the diagnosis. My wife is very intelligent and I feel she has been aware of our losses ever since. I feel that her greatest loss so far has been, I think, her loss of her former peace of mind. She has remained optimistic since seeing the very good Consultant with me, but I feel she has felt loss whenever she sees one of my problems, and whenever she is reminded on the TV or radio what the more severe future losses might be. She realises too the changes that have already taken place since last year, and the sensible preparatory steps that have been taken since, like POA, etc.
What you have given me was a Godsend, and I am much obliged to you for such an excellent idea. I am grateful to you and to this very helpful Forum.
David Joseph
What a brilliant idea. Many thanks. I will start composing a letter like that to my wife, and will deliver it once I feel the slightest twinge of my behaviour changing in a more difficult way.
My wife was with me for my second interview with the Consultant Psychogeriatrician, and when later when I was tested by a research neurologist for a research study on Insight in dementia sufferers, and in both cases participated by disclosing the losses I had shown in activities of daily living and other
behavioural problems.
From the start I was uncomfortably aware of my initial losses, and I was shocked by the diagnosis. My wife is very intelligent and I feel she has been aware of our losses ever since. I feel that her greatest loss so far has been, I think, her loss of her former peace of mind. She has remained optimistic since seeing the very good Consultant with me, but I feel she has felt loss whenever she sees one of my problems, and whenever she is reminded on the TV or radio what the more severe future losses might be. She realises too the changes that have already taken place since last year, and the sensible preparatory steps that have been taken since, like POA, etc.
What you have given me was a Godsend, and I am much obliged to you for such an excellent idea. I am grateful to you and to this very helpful Forum.
David Joseph
Dear Grannie G
Many thanks to you as well, Grannie G. I think confronting this diagnosis honestly, talking about it personally or via the Internet, and participating in research, is the way to go, trying always to help others and stay optimistic. Communication also is very important. Counter to the stereotypes even psychiatrists and psychologists and GPS are not mind readers.
I am finding this Forum and what the Alzheimer’s Society does is very informative and helpful indeed.
Again, many thanks to you,
David Joseph
Many thanks to you as well, Grannie G. I think confronting this diagnosis honestly, talking about it personally or via the Internet, and participating in research, is the way to go, trying always to help others and stay optimistic. Communication also is very important. Counter to the stereotypes even psychiatrists and psychologists and GPS are not mind readers.
I am finding this Forum and what the Alzheimer’s Society does is very informative and helpful indeed.
Again, many thanks to you,
David Joseph
Is your wife a member of this forum too? If not it may be worth her while. Reading other's posts, and asking questions myself, I have learned more about dementia on here due to other's real life experience than I have from any "theory" quoted by any professional! Good luck to you both.
Hi yoy,
I am sure you are right about practical experience being better than theory. What I found surprising is that none of the professionals we have encountered have asked either of us how we felt about the diagnosis. I only came to this realisation when I was reading about sociological studies concerning the actual experiences of dementia sufferers and their carers!!! I know the professionals are pressed for time, and feelings either might not seem relevant or they are worried that it might open a can of worms that they might not feel able to cope with at the time, as they are under pressures from more practical and objective matters.
So, such matters as personal feelings are in
the hands of those who care and have more experience? I don’t know.
Many thanks,
David Joseph
I am sure you are right about practical experience being better than theory. What I found surprising is that none of the professionals we have encountered have asked either of us how we felt about the diagnosis. I only came to this realisation when I was reading about sociological studies concerning the actual experiences of dementia sufferers and their carers!!! I know the professionals are pressed for time, and feelings either might not seem relevant or they are worried that it might open a can of worms that they might not feel able to cope with at the time, as they are under pressures from more practical and objective matters.
So, such matters as personal feelings are in
the hands of those who care and have more experience? I don’t know.
Many thanks,
David Joseph
Thank you for coming on here. Some good advice above. Can I say that my mother is very difficult and refusing to see anyone about any medical issues (not just dementia) which is so difficult for those around her who only want the best for her. She has finally had a scan and waiting for the results but she is so angry about going. If you want to help your wife, please do not make her life difficult by refusing help if she suggests it.
Hi Pebblepebble. In your mother’s defence I would just like to say, I have had cancer (successfully treated) and as far as I know do not have dementia however I have already decided I do not want any life extending treatment for anything. Maybe your mother feels the same way .
