Sylvia, you are much closer to the situation....but I too, am concerned. It is almost a basic instinct, to return to ones nest, den, lair, home.....to hide away to await death. It is putting a huge pressure on Martin and Mandy, who I understand, naturally want to make this stage as comfortable for Helen as possible. They want to help to make things easier, and Helen wants things to be easier, but she also wants to control it all....and quite simply, she can't. She requires constant supervision and constant changes to her medication for pain relief and the like and she cannot have this on tap at home. The system just does not work in this manner. In practical terms the nurses, doctors and drugs have to be summoned each time, which means they take longer to put relief in place.
One day soon, Helen's troubles will be over, but her carers, her family and friends will be left feeling that they have failed her.......and they have not. It is only her own body that has sadly failed her. Tragically, that knowledge will not make them feel better.