A life in the day of.........................

[jan.s]

Hi Sylvia,

I have just caught up with your thread. It is good to hear that Dhiren is contented, there is little more we can wish for. Hopefully his "eating" abilities will improve with time, but if it doesn't distress him, that's a bonus.

I am so pleased that your visit today was a good one, it makes such a difference to how we feel doesn't it.

Jan xx

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you Jan. x

 

[jeany123]

Hello Sylvia,
I am pleased that Dhirin seems contented and that when you left him you had a quiet heart,


Jeany

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you Jeany. xx

 

[Butter]

Contentment is good news.

 

[creativesarah]

I am glad you had a quiet heart Sylvia and that Dhiren is contented

 

[Saffie]

I'm glad you felt well enough again to visit Sylvia. I am not visiting again today for the same reason but will hope to do so tomorrow if this cold has moved on from the infectious stage.

I'm glad too that Dhiren seems contended. That is probably as much as we can hope for and I'm sure it soothes your anxiety. X

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you Butter, Sarah and Saffie. I`ll make the most of it as long as it lasts. xx

 

[Butter]

I hope you continue to be above par again

 

[Helen33]

Dear Sylvia,

It is really wonderful that Dhiren remains content despite all the changes that have (and are) taking place around him Yes, he has days when he is less content but those days are few in number thank goodness.

I am glad that the progress of dementia on Dhiren is gentle and not as it can be - a sudden massive change

`ll make the most of it as long as it lasts. xx

and long may it last.

Love

 

[cragmaid]

You still make him happy Sylvia, even if you are the other woman!!

`wife`, but I don`t think it referred to me.

Peaceful days.....x.

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you Butter, Helen and Maureen.

 

[Grannie G]

It will be Paul`s birthday on Wednesday. I bought him a Manchester United birthday card.

Dhiren and Paul shared a love for Manchester United and although Dhiren lost interest ages ago, I hoped the card might stimulate his interest long enough to give him some pleasure.

Also, I wanted to see how much he could respond to such stimulus.

The card is big, brash and colourful and when opened plays a Manchester United crowd singing one of their rousing choruses.

First I told Dhiren it would be Paul`s birthday and he would ne 49. He was very surprised at his advanced age.

Then I showed him the card. Even though I explained what it was, it didn`t register and when I opened it , he didn`t recognise the chanting either, chanting which he would have enjoyed a few years ago.

I asked if he would like to write a message.
`You do it, `he said.
So I wrote, in large print;

`Happy Birthday Paul.

Love from Mum and…… `

I gave Dhiren the pen, held the card and suggested he add `Dad`.

He had no idea what to do with the pen. He didn`t know it was held upside down. I turned it the right way and he let it hover over the card . Then he focused and said `Done it.`
He had focused on the `and ` and I`m sure he thought it said `Dad`.

I finished writing the greeting.

Then ;
S `Shall we put some money in the card?`
D `Yes.`
S `How much should we put? £10? `
D `No. More than that.`
S ` £20?`
D `Make it £25.`

 

[Goingitalone]

Oh, Sylvia,

Your conversations with Dhiren are so touching. He sounds a very generous man. Was he always like that?

Mum can't do cards now either. I, rather stupidly, gave her a card to sign for my brother's birthday, saying, 'Here you are, Mum, sign this.'

She did just that, signed her name, rather than her usual 'love from Mum.'

 

[Izzy]

Oh Sylvia it is sad when this kind of thing happens. Last year I was trying to get Bill to write something in a Valentine's card for me (at least I think it was then). There was a rugby match on the tv and when I took the card back from him it said Scotland 16 (ish) England 28 (probably). I was so annoyed at him for writing the rugby score. When I calmed down I accepted that I had been foolish to try to get him to do that.

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you Maggie.

Dhiren signed his own name the last time he signed a card to Paul. I`m afraid I can`t remember when.

He always was kind, and hospitable . Sadly the earlier years of his dementia affected his thoughts for others quite badly and I`m so grateful to have this side of him back.

There is a lady in the home for respite care. It is her second visit. She has taken a shine to Dhiren and each time I visit says `Oh he`s lovely` in her lovely Welsh accent.

 

[flowerpot]

This is what makes it all so sad.

 

[Grannie G]

Oh Izzy. Poor Bill. Poor you. It`s such a cruel learning curve.

I don`t even tell Dhiren when my birthday is now, because I know he`d be upset not to buy me a card.
I will buy him a Valentine`s card but only because the home will be having a Valentine`s day party. He won`t have a clue what it`s about.

 

[Izzy]

I know Sylvia. At least for the moment Bill is able to write words, for which I'm grateful. I used to get upset but now I quite happily buy anniversary cards, birthday card etc for myself! Bill can manage if I stand and say exactly what to write. There are days when I think he could manage by himself but I don't chance it. I'd rather avoid the disappointment. I'm luckier than many. Take care. X

 

[Saffie]

Dave hasn't been able to write anything for nearly 2 years now - it was such a shock when I realised it. Youdo seem to have some lovely moments with Dhiren Sylvia, and some - to me - quite reasonable conversations. X