Well, the delusions continued right up to bedtime on Thursday night, without a break
We had strange children disappearing and causing her worry, we had her panicking about the shopping she had bought for 'the woman' that she now couldn't find and Lord knows how many other situations and items that she fretted herself about.
Yesterday morning, she was - well - 'sullen' is the best work I can come up with, I'm afraid. Face like a 'smacked bum', lots of sighs and glares at me and OH - no idea why
Now and again she gets into this routine of asking one of us 2 or 3 questions, and as soon as we have answered, she will turn to someone else and repeat the exact same questions - OH answered her, telling her where she was going, then what time the bus was coming and she immediately turned to me with exactly the same questions. This happened over and over, yesterday morning and eventually OH said to her 'Mum what have I just told you?' She repeated his answers back to him. 'Then why are you asking Ann the same thing again?'. She told him it was because she didn't think he was telling her the truth! Its a really irritating habit and one I think is at least partly, if not completely, a deliberate attempt to wind people up.
The older two came home from Uni for the weekend, in the afternoon, and son went with OH to pick her up from daycare. Have to say, son's eyes were just a tad glazed over when they got back, as Mil had been convinced she had to get organised for her starting uni on the way home and I think his head was just a bit battered from the non stop convoluted fretting/talking she bashed his ears with during the car journey. She seemed thrilled to see oldest daughter too - and both oldest and I were treated to a fairly detailed account of the 'Sports day' that had been held at day care that day, when Mil was asked how her day had been - she said she didn't do the long jump or triple jump, but she did do all the races including the relay!
The rest of the evening was a repeat of the previous two nights - I honestly don't think that anything she said (apart from her mentioning that she enjoyed her tea!) had anything to do with reality at all. A while after tea she started on about the 'babby'/'little girl' - and it morphed again into her being firmly convinced that our youngest daughter was NOT our daughter, but the daughter of one of Mils relatives (in Ireland) that Mil was looking after. She insisted that daughter's surname was the same as her maiden name and that she (Mil) had brought her here just for a visit. Now, we could go along with it going that far, but this is the maybe the 3rd time that we have seen this particular delusion evolve into a sort of sundowning with Mil
She starts to get very bossy with daughter, tells her off if she calls us 'Mum or Dad' , corrects OH or I if we ask the kid to do something and it just generally goes too far - a few weeks ago she got in a furious mood because she was demanding that youngest came and slept in her room and we obviously said no. So, this is one of the situations where we eventually HAVE to simply say enough and tell her to stop. We started off trying to distract, but it didn't work , so into telling her she was 'mistaken (that stopped it dead the night before - but not last night!). She was ordering Daughter to bed 'NOW' as they would have a long journey 'home' in the morning, correcting myself and OH for talking 'to the child as if she was yours' and generally getting more and more OTT
OH told her firmly to stop, that she was getting mixed up, that youngest WAS our daughter and that Mil was to stop ordering her round. No joy - straight into ranting accusations of kidnapping, threats to phone the police and the ' we are not going to discus it' didn't work as she simply continued to mutter comments and to order daughter to bed. At one stage she stood up and made as if to go towards daughter, intending I think, to frog march her upstairs
. I had been looking forward to an evening of catch up with my oldest two, not another evening of the 'Mil and the Mad reality show' so I admit I lost patience at this point - and we were back in the stupidly vicious circle of arguing, which I am absolutely convinced is exactly what she wants on some level at least when she 'sundowns' - she needs the confrontation, maybe as an 'outlet' for her frustration? It ended with OH offering her bedtime meds - which she leapt at - and after she had them, as she opened the door to the hall & stairs, she again turned to youngest and started issuing orders for her to 'come to bed now', saying that she 'didn't care' what 'they' said (presumably OH and self) she was taking her 'home in the morning. I really shouted at her, telling her to go to bed now and back off from MY daughter - she went, but jeeze, you could hear her chunnering on every step of the way!
OH then came and sat down and informed me he didn't think shouting 'helped' - so he got both barrels too
Especially as he had also raised his voice more than a couple of times to her during the latter part of the evening! And I
know shouting makes no difference, but you know what - I think its OK for me to sometimes get fed up of not only being frequently accused of stealing 'someone elses husband' - but also of 'stealing' other people's kids too!
I hope - for all our sakes - that she calms down today - I really don't want this weekend spoiled as this is probably the last time till Easter that both son and oldest daughter will be able to get home at the same time.
