Several of William's family have arrived so it's been an exhausting day. Talk about brain fog! Dau keeps asking me things to do with the funeral organising, and I'm like "what? I don't know. Whatever you think. " But she is being just fabulous. Shopping for food for the guests (I never thought!), has formatted and typed the Order of Service and going to print them tomorrow, making sure I eat, etc. I just want it all to go away.
William has gone
- Thread starter LadyA
- Start date
Sweetie, this is a particularly hard time, leading up to the funeral, when there is so much to think about, and make decisions about, when all you want to do is hide under the duvet.
Glad you have such wonderful support from your daughter, who has thought about things like feeding your guests.
But that's the last thing on your mind. I'm not next to you to give you a cuddle, LadyA, but I can assure you there's a whole army of us TP-ers, sending our love and cuddles through cyberspace. Sweetie, this is a particularly hard time, leading up to the funeral, when there is so much to think about, and make decisions about, when all you want to do is hide under the duvet.
Glad you have such wonderful support from your daughter, who has thought about things like feeding your guests.
Yes, absolutely Scarlett. Pity we can't all be there in person but we are all definitely thinking of you.
I am shocked at myself in the resentment I feel towards the people who are helping with food etc. And I think it's not at them, it's just because they are helping because William has died, and I'm sort of transferring resentment /shock/anger onto them.
LadyA, you are in turmoil at the moment & quite understandably, cut yourself some slack & just try to go with the flow (one cliché too many?!?!?) but you know what I mean.
Take good care & if you can't, let others do it for you.
What esmeralda said is absolutely right. Try to be patient with yourself. You'll process these feelings once the days have calmed down a bit. Sorry you're going through this.
Well
The minister will not read the Poem William wanted him to. He doesn't understand it so doesn't trust it. And in fairness, there was an element of "getting at " him by William in wanting him to read it.
Wish it was all over.
We went and collected William's things today, and brought the staff a hamper of cakes and goodies, flowers and chocolates. Also I donated William's nebuliser to the nursing home. Some of the care assistants broke down in tears when they came to say goodbye and even the nursing manager got tearful talking about William.
I think William went at the right time though. He loved gardens and trees, and when we got there today there were contractors there taking out lots of trees! There is a big extension being built - an extra 40 rooms, plus another lounge, activity room, dining room - it will be like a second nursing home built on. And the gorgeous big shrubbery in front, enormous rhododendrons, azaleas and stunning hydrangeas all have to go because the driveway will be coming through where they are! William would have hated to see it happen.
The minister will not read the Poem William wanted him to. He doesn't understand it so doesn't trust it. And in fairness, there was an element of "getting at " him by William in wanting him to read it.
Wish it was all over.
We went and collected William's things today, and brought the staff a hamper of cakes and goodies, flowers and chocolates. Also I donated William's nebuliser to the nursing home. Some of the care assistants broke down in tears when they came to say goodbye and even the nursing manager got tearful talking about William.
I think William went at the right time though. He loved gardens and trees, and when we got there today there were contractors there taking out lots of trees! There is a big extension being built - an extra 40 rooms, plus another lounge, activity room, dining room - it will be like a second nursing home built on. And the gorgeous big shrubbery in front, enormous rhododendrons, azaleas and stunning hydrangeas all have to go because the driveway will be coming through where they are! William would have hated to see it happen.
Shame about the trees...
Well if he won't read it, can someone else? Or get him to read something like.... Oh I don't know, a spike Milligan type poem.... Or something you know would have made William laugh.....
I planned to read it to my children on Saturday. They are coming for the weekend and I had thought they would appreciate it, So it will be read aloud, if not in the same vicinity as you all will be xxxxxxx
Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
Well if he won't read it, can someone else? Or get him to read something like.... Oh I don't know, a spike Milligan type poem.... Or something you know would have made William laugh.....
I planned to read it to my children on Saturday. They are coming for the weekend and I had thought they would appreciate it, So it will be read aloud, if not in the same vicinity as you all will be xxxxxxx
Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
If he didn't "Get it" it's probably best he doesn't read it. Is there someone else that could read it instead?
You are under such a lot of pressure at the moment, but I'm sure the funeral itself will be a relief.
Wishing you the strength to get through the next few days.
Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
You are under such a lot of pressure at the moment, but I'm sure the funeral itself will be a relief.
Wishing you the strength to get through the next few days.
Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
I think it's not acceptable that a minister can override the wishes of the family. It's not up to him to censor what's being said at a funeral! Get someone else to read it. I think the poem is beautiful and I want to steal it. Who's the author?
What a pity there is upset over the poem, sounds like it's rooted in a bit of a personality clash. It is beautiful though. Hope the minister is agreeable to someone else reading it as suggested.
I would be upset to see the lovely trees and shrubbery going and it would have been very hard for William to understand so as you say LadyA, a blessing he didn't have to see it.
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I would be upset to see the lovely trees and shrubbery going and it would have been very hard for William to understand so as you say LadyA, a blessing he didn't have to see it.
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William has had the last word though, bless him. How can you not trust a poem because you don,'T understand it? Well done grandson for being much more in tune.
Be kind to yourself , of course you are angry, sometimes it's hard to accept that people will do so much at some times when you struggle alone for so long.
Over soon and then you can grieve as you need to, without expectations from othets
Be kind to yourself , of course you are angry, sometimes it's hard to accept that people will do so much at some times when you struggle alone for so long.
Over soon and then you can grieve as you need to, without expectations from othets
that's what I'm clinging too, although others say I'm going to really get hit with it in a week or two, when the visitors are gone and I don't have to go to the nursing home anymore. And have to deal with the Legalities and disposing of William's clothes etc. But my friends will help I know.
Really pleased that William's grandson will read the poem and how unkind and thoughtless of the Minister. Can understand the resentment you feel. Where were all these people when you needed them? Such a shame about the trees and shrubs. I would have hated it too.xxx
