• Expert Q&A: Rare dementias - Tues 3 March, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of rare dementias. It will be hosted by Nikki and Seb from Rare Dementia Support. If you have any questions about rare dementias, they will be here to answer them on Tuesday 3 March between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

Who am I ? I won't know myself soon!!!

Sarasa

Registered User
Apr 13, 2018
867
@annielou , hope today is a better day. I think you need to stick to the going home in the evening and hassling all and sundry about getting the help you and your mum need.
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
503
Yorkshire
Thanks @Woohoo @Pete1 @Sarasa xxx
Mum didn't ring anymore last night so I stayed at home.
I did cancel the dementia charity carer support worker visit today as I really didn't want to unsettle mum with anymore visits than had to this week. We still have to go to docs for blood test on friday and I think mum was unsettled after memory worker visit yesterday and friday will probably do same with her a bit too.
It was good of sis to arrange the visit thinking it would help, but I think talking about groups etc they offer again would unnerve mum again as did yesterday, and with mum being there while I would have been talking about her and her symptoms I couldn't really ask for much advice either without probably upsetting mum. I felt today what I gained wouldn't outweigh the possible negative effect on mum and I was quite shattered and stressed after worrying about mum last night too.
Mum had another mixed day today but is still calmer than she was before the tablets. She was still a bit mixed up and worrying about a couple of things, but not as het up as previously, though not as calm as the weekend. She said she was a bit fed up and looked a bit low this afternoon but then she does get like that when she thinks she has been in the house all day even when she has company. She left some of her dinner today and said she didn't want it as not that hungry so I'll have to keep an eye on if she is feeling down and going off eating again but it could just have been what we had that she wasn't as fond of.
I rang mum when I got home tonight and she sounded ok and I told her I'd see her tomorrow and we said night. Then she rang me about 15 minutes later to check if I was home so I told her yes I was home safe and she just said oh good well I'll see you tomorrow night night love. I'm hoping she is ok overnight again. I'm finding it quite hard and worrying but I'll keep on trying and hoping for she'll be ok x
 

Woohoo

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
711
South East
You are doing great @annielou , you are doing everything with your mums best interests at heart and that can never be wrong . Glad you are getting away , hope you can relax a little . X
 

Pete1

Registered User
Jul 16, 2019
504
I'm finding it quite hard and worrying but I'll keep on trying and hoping for she'll be ok
Hi @annielou, I'm not surprised you are finding it tough, I hope you can soon get some additional support for Mum to help you both. Always do what works for you and Mum - you know Mum better than anyone else. Stay strong - all the best. .
 

Elle3

Registered User
Jun 30, 2016
636
Thanks @Woohoo @Pete1 @Sarasa xxx
Mum didn't ring anymore last night so I stayed at home.
I did cancel the dementia charity carer support worker visit today as I really didn't want to unsettle mum with anymore visits than had to this week. We still have to go to docs for blood test on friday and I think mum was unsettled after memory worker visit yesterday and friday will probably do same with her a bit too.
It was good of sis to arrange the visit thinking it would help, but I think talking about groups etc they offer again would unnerve mum again as did yesterday, and with mum being there while I would have been talking about her and her symptoms I couldn't really ask for much advice either without probably upsetting mum. I felt today what I gained wouldn't outweigh the possible negative effect on mum and I was quite shattered and stressed after worrying about mum last night too.
Mum had another mixed day today but is still calmer than she was before the tablets. She was still a bit mixed up and worrying about a couple of things, but not as het up as previously, though not as calm as the weekend. She said she was a bit fed up and looked a bit low this afternoon but then she does get like that when she thinks she has been in the house all day even when she has company. She left some of her dinner today and said she didn't want it as not that hungry so I'll have to keep an eye on if she is feeling down and going off eating again but it could just have been what we had that she wasn't as fond of.
I rang mum when I got home tonight and she sounded ok and I told her I'd see her tomorrow and we said night. Then she rang me about 15 minutes later to check if I was home so I told her yes I was home safe and she just said oh good well I'll see you tomorrow night night love. I'm hoping she is ok overnight again. I'm finding it quite hard and worrying but I'll keep on trying and hoping for she'll be ok x
Hi, I have been following your post in the background and I really feel for your situation and I wanted to say you are doing a fantastic job caring for your mum, I know how not easy it is.

Just a thought with regards visits, my dad was also very much against anyone coming into his home and was very suspicious of people visiting and would constantly worry about it. The way I got around this was I kept telling dad they were coming to see me and to help and give me advice. Once he took this on board the visits became very easy as I managed to get the people visiting to focus on me, but they were still able to ask my dad questions and get the info they needed. I would forewarn them either on the phone when the visit was arranged or when I greeted them at the door. They were always very obliging and understanding and it worked very well. You could also do this with any carer visits, say they are there to help you, not your mum.

I also wanted to say well done for managing to go home and sleep at home, I know it is a worry and sleep is not easy when you worry. With regards the phone calls, similar would happen to me, I would call dad to say I had arrived home, but then shortly after I'd get a phone call asking if I was home. I think there was a couple of reasons for this, one he'd forgotten I'd been and said I would ring and two he didn't associate the first call with me, just some random person calling him but this quite possibly triggered a memory to call me. When he went through the process of looking up my number and calling, he then knew it was me and he was always OK after this. I hope this might put your mind at ease and prepare you for it happening maybe each time you go home.

Take care. x
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
503
Yorkshire
Thank you @Woohoo @Pete1 @Elle3 xxx
Elle3 I will try that with carers if we get some x. I usually say that SW etc have to come and mum accepts that, but then moans at me about me telling them things and the visits always unsettle her as she tries to think about what they said and remembers odd bits they said that she worrys about.
Before I stayed with mum for months before that I would always ring mum when I got home and she would nearly always ring me a bit after I had rung her to ask if I was home. Sometimes she acted like she had no idea she had asked me to ring her or that I had, she said she had just thought she'd ring and check. Other times she would ring and say oh you are home then! why didn't you ring and let me know! or say she had asked me to ring but I hadn't and she'd been sat worrying, other times she would ring and say I can't remember if you rang to say you were home so I thought I'd check. I usually got at least one but quite often two, three or four calls a night checking I was home. Now I'm staying at home since Saturday she's done it a few times but thankfully not as often or as many as before bless her.
Constant checking I was home calls were quite common along with constant calls to see if I was coming to see her and calls because she was bored, or to ask day, or how to do something, or what was on tele. In the months before I stayed with her I regularly got around 20-30 calls a day and around half a dozen a night from mum, some of the day time ones were only a few minutes but some were half an hour to an hour long Even on the days I visited I could get half a dozen calls before I set off late morning.
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
503
Yorkshire
Today mum has been more mixed up and worried again, it seems the worry and confusion is coming back more each day after the calm of the weekend.
She said she felt sick and off it when I rang this morning before I went over. She said she'd slept till bout half 5 but then couldnt go back off but laid there till bout half 8 feeling bit sicky before getting up just before I rang her. Yesterday she asked me to remind her to wash her hair so I did this morning while on phone. When I got there just after ten this morning she was dressed and drinking another cup of tea and said she still felt sicky.
She had been in shower but not washed her hair, I thought that was because she didn't feel well but she said no she didn't know why hadn't cos she'd meant to, she said it was hurting a bit cos needed washing and thought it might make her feel bit better so was surprised she hadn't done it.(she'd been meaning to do it for few days as not been washed since last friday)
After we chatted for a bit and she'd had her morning tablets she decided to wash it in sink cos she wanted to go out somewhere and we decided to come over to my house. She didn't think she'd been for ages (even though we came over on tuesday but she couldn't remember that) and we had half an hour of her asking what day it was, and what had we done on what day this week, and had she been to my house lately, and when. On the way to my house (an hour) she asked constantly if locked doors and what had she done with her keys, which is normal for her but she hadn't asked as much on tuesday and was calmer about it then but back to worrying today.
She was ok at my house for a bit but then this afternoon the talk about not seeing our Andrea started and so we had lots of mixed up questions and answers about who I was, she thought I was 'friend' again, another Andrea but not daughter briefly and then another 'friend' with same name as other friend but not that one. We had lots of where Andrea was, thought she had a house in my village, didn't know where lived, not seen her house, didn't know if she had a house but left to go off with boyfriend, lived with mum for years, she'd never been married, lived in mums bungalow with her till recently, she was about 28 or 30 and then i 40s. She couldn't work out ages of people, who lived where and why, and her answers to her own questions got weirder each time. She told me the photo of me and hubby I have on drawers was of me 'friend' and 'friends hubby' but when I described what 'friend and hubby' looked like she agreed and when i said that not us is it we don't look like that do we, she said no but she knew we were them. Then she wanted to know who had been staying with her, someone else had. It wasn't me, it was her other daughter, not me not sis but the other one, then it wasn't her daughter but another lady, and then her grandaughter .
I tried to say even if didn't know who I was I wasn't hurting her and was looking after her, which she agreed with, so why don't we just leave worrying about it for now and just relax a bit and it might come back wto her or we can work it out later. She agreed but then she asked to go home.
Said she was going to walk home because she had walked here, she didn't know way home, thought she lived at house we lived in before I got married which is 2 houses ago for her, thought it took a while to walk but wasn't sure how long but she knew she went up street cos she'd walked up here earlier after I rang her and asked her to come. So then we had that for a while but I managed to convince her to stay for dinner and we'd take her in car later.
She said she didn't really want any dinner as wasn't hungry and felt sick still. I asked her to just try some so could take tablets. I went off to make dinner and she asked Andie if she could help a few times and when I gave her her dinner she ate it which was a relief but then started in with who lived with her again. She did quieten down though and stayed till 8 watching tele.
She didn't say much in car, she's usually pretty quiet in the car so not unusual for her, she commented on some bike riders and odd one or two other thing and seemed ok. When we got in her house a note was pushed through letterbox saying window cleaner been and then few minutes later she went looking for a note in letterbox. I asked what for thinking she was thinking about window cleaner and she said 'to see when funeral was'.
She had gone back to something she gets stuck with a lot, her mum had died and they had to clear house and she didn't know when funeral was and didn't want to miss it. She didn't believe it was a long time ago and house etc was all sorted, she had key to her mums house here look! it was one of her keys, well I know its just happened!. Hubby tried distracting her with something we'd heard on radio in car and she talked bout it for few minutes then started again about her mum. She needed to clear her house, needed let council know, needed pay her rent. We answered all those and thought she was ok again as she commented on something on tv but then she was back to it.
She told us she knew it had only recently happened because she went to her mums house the other day and nobody was in and so she'd walked to where her grandma used to live and knocked on a door and a woman had come out and she asked her if she had seen her mum and the woman told her she was dead. So mum knew her mum was dead now, it was couple of weeks ago she found out and she didn't want to miss funeral. She hadn't been so if had it then she'd missed it. After a bit of gentle explaining she seemed to get it and said oh i must be mixed up then, so we stayed bit longer talking about tv and then she told me she wasn't coming tomorrow cos she wanted to do her work. She had washing to do because she'd not been there for a while. Only been at my house for afternoon but thinks she's been staying elsewhere for a while and just come back, she does this a lot. So she said oh well I still got stuff to do but you can come if you want. I said I'd come to hers later and we talked for a minute about that then as I said we'd go home now and I'd see her tomorrow she said she'd have to ring her brother to come clear house. I told her it was all done and sorted and she didnt need ring him. Well whats all this then she said pointing to her furniture. I said this is yours this is your house. No its not I live in .... (childhood home) this is mums house here. Then she looked round for a bit and said oh no this is mine isn't it, its only one bedroom my mums had 3. We got her settled down again so then left saying I'd ring when get in and see you tomorrow.
When I rang her to say I was home she asked where i was and who I was with and where I'd been. She thought she had been at friends house and they had brought her back. She couldnt remember being with me and hubby and after a few questions said I'm confused Andie I don't know whats happening to me. We were on the phone about ten minutes with her saying she had thought this and not that been with me and didn't know why mixing it up and was confused and she was going to get worse and did hubby think she was barmy cos she didnt know been with us. I tied to reassure her not barmy and it would be ok and she was ok and she said you'll have to start and say who you are, tell me your Andie and say where you taking me.
If only it were that simple, I do say who I am and do say where going but she doesn't take it in or remember it a lot of the times. :(
After being so much calmer on saturday and sunday, gradually the worrying and being anxious when shes confused is coming back a bit more each day and its lasting longer and her questioning and mixed up thinking but needing to keep talking about it is getting back to how it was before new tablet. So far she's not getting aggressive and is staying calmer, but is starting to get more upset about it and was almost on verge of shouting today a couple of times while saying I was wrong about something.
 

Pete1

Registered User
Jul 16, 2019
504
Hi @annielou, a tough day for sure. Perhaps the medication has helped to calm Mum a bit but the dementia confusion continues and seems to be getting worse day by day (my Mum used to think her bungalow was her Mums). On the plus side you are managing to leave Mum to sleep in your own bed. I really hope you get some support soon to help you both. Stay strong.
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
2,580
Hello lovely just caught up with your news;
You really need to step away for a bit & let the crisis happen to force social services to act.
Maybe ask for some respite care cover so you can have a break.
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
755
Bedford
Your kindness and patience shines through. I am glad for you though that you are still managing to get home at night to sleep. It seems that if you stayed your Mum would be going round in the same loops. Really hope that those carers can start coming in soon and your Mum will accept them.
 

Sarasa

Registered User
Apr 13, 2018
867
Hope the trip for the blood test isn't too stressful for both of you @annielou. I'm glad you are getting home to sleep. I agree about too many people visiting confusing your mum, so cancelling the visit this week was probably sensible, but you do need to chase up SS etc to get help in.
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
503
Yorkshire
Thanks @Pete1 @DesperateofDevon @Bikerbeth @Sarasa xxxx
I am struggling to leave her when confused and upset. I know that if I was there she would continue with the loop of questions like we did when I stayed there, but I would know she was safe and if she got really upset I would be there to comfort her, although sometimes she would resist that for quite a while when she thought I was telling her wrong things.
I'm so worried that she will now try to go find Our Andie or 'friends' house or go home to where she thinks her house is now as she is convinced she walks places on her own which is a new and worrying development this past month.
I don't know how long it will be before she won't be left on her own again. I had a feeling the calm of the weekend wouldn't last but hoped it would. She was much less confused about things then too, which I know is not what the sertraline does so didn't think that would really last, but thought it was keeping the worrying about being confused at bay. Either that or she was on best behaviour at weekend after SW visit and chat with me and sis and wasn't able to keep that up for long. Whatever the reason she is back to being confused and getting upset about it more each day.
Social worker called yesterday for a catch up after fridays visit and both sis and I missed her calls. Sis was in a meeting at work and I didn't notice I'd missed the call until almost an hour later when mum took a break from questioning who I was to go to loo and I checked phone and saw voicemail left from earlier. She must have called while I'd been in kitchen earlier flipping a tripped fuse and changing lightbulb. Mum never mentioned my phone ringing or pinging with voicemail message and also one from sis and when I'd come back we'd gone back to who are you etc so I didn't think to check phone.
Anyway sis said she will try ring her back today. I told her to ask SW to put all stuff on care plan she can and we'd try our best to get mum to try them when there as no point waiting for her to agree first. Also told sis to tell her we thought mum was lot calmer and less het up at weekend but the worry is coming back now and though not aggressive at moment she is getting more upset about things each day. So we'll see what she has to say IF sis manages to get hold of her today.
Hoping we manage an ok trip to docs for blood test today too x
 

Woohoo

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
711
South East
Hi @annielou, I’m sorry mum’s confusion is creeping back, maybe she was in hostess mode while your sister was there, it tires them out apparently so can’t keep it up for too long . Could you try and agree with mum when she says about her mum and clearing house, like oh I’m sorry mum shall we go tom once it’s light and sort that out . It’s so very hard, you are truly a very kind caring person . Can you contact sw via email so you can talk freely ? . They really need chasing up frequently , the more you get on at them the sooner they will get something sorted. It’s a shame but he who shouts the loudest and all that . Hope today is a better day for you . Sending hugs just in case you would like one . X
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
159
The terrible thing about this situation is that your mum knows there's something wrong. My dad thinks he's fine, the rest of us are crackers. Nothing wrong with him at all! I think you're going to have to go back to SW and tell them she's getting worse and possibly wandering. That you can't be there 24/7 to watch her and check she's not wandering and they have to step in. Good luck, you are doing a great job x
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
503
Yorkshire
Thanks @Woohoo @imthedaughter xx Mum has been worrying about things again for quite a lot of the time today.
She seemed quiet and a bit low when I arrived at ten this morning so I told her about people watching I'd done on bus on way through to get her chatting and smiling a bit. Then we decided to tidy out her handbag which I swear weighed more than her and I made lots of jokes about the multiple pens and packs of mints and pantyliners we found in it which cheered her up for a while.
But then she started worrying about going to docs for blood test and if she needed go loo (ongoing bowel thing) and what was she going for and did she have an appointment because she didn't have a card.
Everytime mum has to go to drs, hospital, opticians she thinks she should have an appointment card bless her. No amount of telling her we did it online or over phone and everything is on computer now so dont need a card will settle her, even when we have appointment letter sent in post from hospital she still thinks it should be a card or she hasn't got an appointment. I am thinking of printing off some cards saying appointment and writing down day and time when we next have an appointment and showing her that. Could be a bit embarrassing when she wants to hand it in to them but it may help, or then again she just might keep asking as many times anyway and I'll have to keep showing her card but it may be worth a go.
On the walk to bus stop, and on the two buses to drs she kept asking had she locked the doors and what was she going for, did she have appointment, was drs open all day. Then in the waiting room while we waited ten minutes it was what is it I've come for, whats wrong with me, what do i say, will you say it, are you coming in with me.
I know its scary and unsettling for her and I kept telling myself that and just kept answering her as reassuringly as I could. I took some rescue remedy when got to mums and sucked a lozenge of it too while on way so I managed to keep us both relatively calm despite the constant questions.
The actual blood test went ok and when we came out mum seemed a lot calmer so when we got into town we decided to pop in a few shops for a quick look. Mum was fine in new look and boots looking round and ok in marks at first but then when we were queuing she said i cant remember where my house is.She'd asked earlier if we could go back to my house after drs and have dinner there then drop her home after but in marks she was confused about where lived and so I asked if she wanted to go back to hers instead so she could see her house and she said yes.
All way to bus station she kept asking why are we going this way, do we go down here, wheres my bus stop, do you know way. Then she was asking where buses went from to village where lived with her mum growing up because she lived across the road from her mum now, (which she never has), I told her not to worry I knew where she lived and what bus to catch and I'd show her way. She had to sit behind me on bus because it was packed so she couldn't talk much to me but tapped me a few times to ask if I knew when to get off. Once off it she had no idea of way to her house and kept saying is it up there, is it this way, do you know way, do we need to cross road again. When I pointed out her street she said do I live on this side of road, I thought it was over that side up there (which was a shortcut across a playing field to where we lived till I was a teenager, 30 odd year ago)
Once inside she seeemed to know her house and settled down for an hour but then at half four she wanted to know where our Andie (me) was as she was supposed to be getting her some more tablets. I was back to being 'friend' again and she hadn't seen our andie who had gone off to live with new boyfriend and not been in touch, she didn't want her to come back and live with her it was fine she had gone to live with boyfriend but she just wanted to see her a few times. She'd popped in yesterday and just given her some tablets in the morning but then gone again without a word didnt even speak to her hardly. I tried not to say much, not to either agree or disagree and just left her to it.
Then after half an hour of it she got up to go to loo and then looked at me and said has 'friend' been here Andie she hasn't has she, I said no and she said did you come with me today, did you go in town and on bus with me and when I said yes she said I thought it was 'friend' oh andie am losing it and was a bit upset and sat next to me. I gave her hug and said well you've got me back now and know who I am now so don't worry about it. She said her brain had gone with what was wrong with her and was sorry, so I said that she had just mixed things up a bit and forgot for a while thats what alzheimers does but its not her fault she not done anything bad.She said but I din't know it was you. I told her it's ok its come back now and she knew who I was now. She was worried she'd been nasty to me but I said she hadn't and it had only been half hour and it didn't matter.
She calmed down then and went to loo and was ok then apart from asking me what having for dinner and would I help make it because she didnt know how now. And then a bit later asked a few times if she could come to supermarket and to my house tomorrow and if we could get her some money out cos she doesnt know how to do it.
We left about half seven telling her I'd ring in morning and see her tomorrow and we'd go to supermarket and my house. I was quite worried she'd be ok on own after being quite worried today but I risked going to inlaws with hubby tonight. Its the first time I've gone when sis hasn't been here to stay with mum in months. I rang mum when we arrived at inlaws to say were there safe and she seemed ok and quite calm.
I kept my phone next to me and forewarned the in laws she may phone and she did at about 20 past 9. She asked if I could come through tomorrow cos she was in trouble. She was worried she'd not been collecting her pension, She said I've been confused today and I think I still am but I'm panicking cos I haven't got any money and I need to pay somebody, She said that she'd not been in council to let them know living there, hadn't paid her rent, that she owed someone money, that she didn't know how to get money out of bank. I told her all sorted and when and how bills paid, where money went into bank and that we'd get her money out and pay her bills when had them like normal and there was no need to worry. We help her with her money and went with her when needed see people and wouldn't let her get in a mess with her money and I think I calmed her down because she said ok thanks love I'll see you tomorrow then. I told her I'd ring her in morning and see her tomorrow and we said night.
So all in all not the best day for her as shes been quite worried for a lot of it but thankfully still calmer and calms down quicker than before but the worrying is definately coming back more now than last weekend.
Sis managed to get through to SW and confirmed we'd give everything a try. SW said she would get on with it and let us know when anything was sorted. She would refer mum to voluntary service for befriender and contact day centre and community transport to get her there and contact care provider for mums carer visits but she warned again that that will probably be a while. SW asked how we'd been since last fridays visit and sis told her mum had been calmer at the weekend so we'd left her on own overnight and I hadn't stayed rest of this week but mum seemed to be getting worse again now so I was taking things day by day and SW said it was good I was getting some time away but knows its worrying.
woohoo the hug is much appreciated x heres one back for you and anyone who needs one (X)
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
755
Bedford
It sounds like you are able to cope with it a little better with your Mum being calmer but still very anxious. You just sound less tired. I am certainly not implying that it is easier for you. I am glad that follow up is still being done with SW and I guess you (or your sister) will still have to push for everything going forward but it does seem like there is a tiny glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. Sounds like a good idea regarding the ‘appointment cards’ although maybe quite a few spares as well for when they are put somewhere safe. Still pleased to hear that you are getting a little time for yourself and hubby.
 

Woohoo

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
711
South East
Morning @annielou , the hug was much appreciated thank you and sending you more back xxxxx

I agree that the appointment card might be a good idea but yes you will need a few . Our dr’s still use them so wonder if it’s worth an ask next time you are there . You are doing brilliantly the way you are responding to Mum and her worries , it seems to be helping . Also staying at home is another huge step , you do need that time out /away from dementia . Wholeheartedly agree with @Bikerbeth , you or sister will need to keep on the pressure with SW , the more you hassle her the sooner she will get things sorted . Hope you get somethings in place soon . In the meantime you are doing fab . I might try the rescue remedy . Hope today is as ok as can be . Extra hugs xxxx
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
11,368
South coast
I think you are doing amazingly well, @annielou . Well done for going home at night and even going out in the evening to visit your in-laws. I remember this stage with mum, it was a nightmare
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))
PS, I too think that mocking up some appointment cards is worth a try.
 

deepetshopboy

Registered User
Jul 7, 2008
238
Thanks @Pete1 @DesperateofDevon @Bikerbeth @Sarasa xxxx
I am struggling to leave her when confused and upset. I know that if I was there she would continue with the loop of questions like we did when I stayed there, but I would know she was safe and if she got really upset I would be there to comfort her, although sometimes she would resist that for quite a while when she thought I was telling her wrong things.
I'm so worried that she will now try to go find Our Andie or 'friends' house or go home to where she thinks her house is now as she is convinced she walks places on her own which is a new and worrying development this past month.
I don't know how long it will be before she won't be left on her own again. I had a feeling the calm of the weekend wouldn't last but hoped it would. She was much less confused about things then too, which I know is not what the sertraline does so didn't think that would really last, but thought it was keeping the worrying about being confused at bay. Either that or she was on best behaviour at weekend after SW visit and chat with me and sis and wasn't able to keep that up for long. Whatever the reason she is back to being confused and getting upset about it more each day.
Social worker called yesterday for a catch up after fridays visit and both sis and I missed her calls. Sis was in a meeting at work and I didn't notice I'd missed the call until almost an hour later when mum took a break from questioning who I was to go to loo and I checked phone and saw voicemail left from earlier. She must have called while I'd been in kitchen earlier flipping a tripped fuse and changing lightbulb. Mum never mentioned my phone ringing or pinging with voicemail message and also one from sis and when I'd come back we'd gone back to who are you etc so I didn't think to check phone.
Anyway sis said she will try ring her back today. I told her to ask SW to put all stuff on care plan she can and we'd try our best to get mum to try them when there as no point waiting for her to agree first. Also told sis to tell her we thought mum was lot calmer and less het up at weekend but the worry is coming back now and though not aggressive at moment she is getting more upset about things each day. So we'll see what she has to say IF sis manages to get hold of her today.
Hoping we manage an ok trip to docs for blood test today too x
Hi ive read your post about your mum and worried she might start wandering which rungbells with me when i went home again for the 2 nd time I installed cameras amd a door sensor ( careline in my area do one that attaches to
Door that can be set up at cerain times ) but my son bought one snd did it fir me on my dads door thank god i got it as i never would have know he was gojng out at night as far as my knowledge he went out 3 times in the night once saying he was in danger he was going get ‘ stabbed ‘ that trigggerd me dropping everything and saying he cant be left by himself at night anymore but id be so guilty and upset if he dod go
Missing at night and something happened to him
Have a think about door sensor you might need them now x