Update on David

[Helen33]

Dear Jan,

I suspect that if David didn't have dementia, a day like he was having would have been very stressful!!! For him the car wasn't starting and he wanted you to help It would have been bad enough in real life but in 'two different worlds' You know that I like the idea of David being active in this world he inhabits inside - it's like life is 'normal' for him. For you it is a different story altogether and maybe this is where Barry, Ken and others are right about it being harder for the carer than the cared for!!

I only ever think of you with the utmost respect and love cos I think the world of you

Love

 

[BeckyJan]

Thanks Helen:

In 'our' real life David would have sorted car problems - we understood our own areas of control!!! I guess that is why he could not include me in his world this afternoon

I think I am off to bed with a book!!

 

[Helen33]

we understood our own areas of control!!!

No wonder it all seems bizarre now Jan!!!

Love - hope the book is good

 

[CaPattinson]

And from me too, dear Jan


Sleep peacefully XXX

 

[Grannie G]

I hope you will be able to relax tonight Jan, have a read and a good sleep, after your really distressing day. xx

 

[Bronwen]

Dear Jan..just catching up on posts and wanted to send you a big hug, because it is so hard to help your lovely David, when he thinks he has a problem.Trevor is constantly in work mode and is asking about contracts and jobs done etc. which is so sad as his job was stressful and this stress seems to have crept back in his life. I tell him we have no problems (apart from worrying about the home fees..he thinks it is NHS..I wish!!) and i find it so sad that he had stresses when working and they have returned.

To say it is unfair is an understatement!!

My love to you
Bronwen x

 

[BeckyJan]

Today has been difficult.

The Consultant came to review today. Coincidentally we arrived together but she went off to see the Nurse and I went on to David. He did not greet me as normal as he was too busy hallucinating.
There were pencils hanging from cords in the corner of the room.

The Consultant arrived and I introduced them. He did not acknowledge as he was discussing (with himself) the direction the train was travelling. We tried to include him in our conversation which revolved around medication.

We have agreed to reduce Aricept to 5 mg from beginning of January and if there are no affects we will stop completely from beginning of February. If changes occur within two weeks of the reduction it is likely to be lack of Aricept but after that it is likely to be a downturn in the disease.

Once this is done the Consultant is likely to reduce Quetiapine but thinks we should leave Citalopram as that is possibly the most helpful drug for him at this stage.

She stayed around 25 mins. The hallucinations continued. There were people in the room and he urged a fellow to pass by! He was talking to folk I did not know!

I feel despondent knowing that we are now at a pretty dismal stage of this wretched disease.

 

[sue38]

I'm so sorry today was so difficult Jan. Are you in agreement with the Consultant's proposals?

 

[BeckyJan]

Yes I am Sue. Some views suggest that Quetiapine should be the first one to target, but that was prescribed to reduce his anxiety and agitation. If it works then the low dose is not doing much harm.

Ideally all his medication should be reduced but assessing the affects will be easier if its done step by step.

 

[larivy]

sorry you had such a bad visit hope your next visit is better and david is more alert love larivy

 

[Helen33]

Dear Jan,

I am sorry that today was a difficult one Jan but it does sound productive in that you had a good amount of time with the consultant.

assessing the affects will be easier if its done step by step.

This sounds very sensible to me.

Sending you love and hope you will give Oscar a stroke from me

 

[Grannie G]

I suppose at least the consultant saw what you see Jan, instead of a `more socially aware` David others seem to see.
So because he didn`t show that side of himself to the consultant, maybe he has experienced a downturn.
It`s getting increasingly difficult for you I know. Please try your relaxing techniques.
Love xx

 

[nellbelles]

Jan

Hope that the consultation proves it's worth in the future.

((HUGS))

 

[DeborahBlythe]

Dear Jan, I'm so sorry this week has been particularly hard for you.
When you posted about David's anxieties re the car I thought. ' Gosh, that was one thing my mum never fretted about.' True, she did ask once or twice what had happened to her car, but she never seemed to think again about actually driving and all the worries it could have conjured up.

On the other hand, when my mother's Aricept was stopped, it happened without any consultation so I guess you are having a marginally better experience than we did on that front.

Depressing nevertheless. I do feel for you. Sending you love and hugs, Deborah xx

 

[BeckyJan]

Thanks all - you are a special group when I need it most.

I have given Oscar a special stroke. If Vonny is reading she will understand I am re considering keeping a couple of hens The idea came when David first went to NH.

http://www.omlet.co.uk/products_services/products_services.php?view=Eglu+Cube

IF I go ahead I am wondering how Oscar will cope. They say cats are ok with hens BUT ?Oscar?.

If David was here he would be telling me how mad I am but he loves me anyway (AND he would be up tomorrow planning the hen run).

 

[Nan2seven]

Dear Jan,

I was so sorry to read how difficult your last two visits to David have been. Good in its way, though, that the consultant saw him at a low point. But so very hard for you.

By weird coincidence, I was only thinking yesterday of getting two or three chickens, but I don't know if our back garden is really quite big enough. Maybe I'll think about it again in the spring.

Thinking of you and sending love,
Nan XXX

 

[Canadian Joanne]

Sorry things have been so rough for you. But there will still be good days for you and David.

I'm surprised the consultant is reducing the quetiapine if David is still having hallucinations. Proceeding slowly as you are is a good thing. What about Ebixa? Would the consultant consider trying that?

As for the hens and Oscar, I don't know. I can imagine my four clinging to that Eglu run & scaring the poor hens to death.

 

[Grannie G]

If Vonny is reading she will understand I am re considering keeping a couple of hens .

Jan!

What about the Foxes? You already have to dispose of dead mice by your back door. Do you want dead hens too?

 

[florence43]

Oh, Jan.

What a terrible time you're both having. It must be so hard to see David like this. I crumble because mum doesn't say anything to me at all, but I read your post and it made me see it in a different way.

I admire the strength it must take to share, but NOT share, what he sees and what he says.

It must be awfully sad and difficult, and my heart goes out to you.

Sending lots of love,

 

[Bronwen]

Dear Jan...I am so sorry.. it is so painful to watch and you feel so helpless as they are in their own world and these imaginery people are always there and so real to them.

As you say..a dismal disease and so sad and hard for everyone who cares.

Love
Bronwen x