The sun is shining yet I feel sad and envious

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by Beannie, Jul 17, 2016.

  1. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Hi and a warm welcome from me to TP. :) Here on Talking Point, you are allowed to rant away, feel sorry for yourself, have a little moan or a Great Big Moan, and everybody understands perfectly. :) Nobody judges you, or makes you feel that you should be a mixture of Mother Theresa and Princess Diana, and serenely sail through every sleepless night, and incontinence outcome.

    Whatever your situation, you can be sure that at least one of the lovey people on here will have experienced something similar and can help and/or advise. And you win the prize for a stunning name. :) Many moons ago, I helped a quiz team I was on win first prize cos I knew the one of the Queen Mum's names was Marguerite. :D
     
  2. rhubarbtree

    rhubarbtree Registered User

    Jan 7, 2015
    468
    North West
    When I first saw this heading it took me back to O level sociology, so many years ago. Durkheim wondered why there were more suicides in the summer months than the winter. Research showed it was because sad, lonely people could see others out and about enjoying themselves. And that's what we see.

    Oh Irismay, the closing windows and doors. Over the last few days I have suddenly been reunited with hot flushes only to find doors shut and locked. Have been making a real effort not to get annoyed or discuss this, just about managing to get up and reopen. OH not to be parted from his vest but at least woolly jumpers have been left off.

    At the moment my greatest miss is the TV news. Have to shield OH from all the atrocities, they really distress him and as he has little sense of time he cannot distinguish between old and new footage. Tonight my son rang and we had a long chat about politics made me realise how much I was missing a conversation. Thank goodness for the internet. Email, facebook and twitter keep me in touch with the real world. I really don't think I could cope as a carer without it.
     
  3. Daisymarguerite

    Daisymarguerite Registered User

    Jul 18, 2016
    10
    Thank you for your kind words and encouragement . It's a lovely hot sunny day and I'm really working at counting my blessings!
    I decided to stop using the carers last week thinking I could manage on my own. Guess what? I was wrong. Not only are they much better at managing OH but it is another face in the house. I think the social worker was rather wise when she said let's stop the help for a week and review.
    i hope everyone on TP can enjoy the lovely weather and get some calm in their souls !
     
  4. teetoe

    teetoe Registered User

    Mar 10, 2016
    78
    NSW, Australia
    It's really hard not to get bogged down in the banality of looking after someone with dementia isn't it, the empty conversations, the loneliness, even sitting in a coffee bar with nothing to say - but here we are, and we need to address it.

    My goal for tomorrow:
    • Make a to-do list and try to knock one thing off a day
    • Put on upbeat music all day and sing to it
    • Go for a walk with or without OH, anywhere that is "out" amongst people
    • Call a friend for a chat and not mention "dementia"
    oh. and try to be a little more patient. :)
     
  5. Trisha4

    Trisha4 Registered User

    Jan 16, 2014
    2,440
    Yorkshire
    Hi teetoe. I can go along with all your suggestions but I do struggle with the little more patient. Hot weather doesn't help!


    Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
     
  6. christmas

    christmas Registered User

    Apr 27, 2014
    206
    Leicestershire
    That's just how I feel we saved all our life so we could do things when we retired ,we had so many plans, it's funny you don't think one of you will be ill , every day I think wouldn't it be nice to go on holiday but that's not going to happen but I can dream , so don't feel bad for your thoughts , believe me you are not on your own.Christmas xxxhugs
     

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