Potential Sectioning

[Rowan23]

Hi All,

I have posted before about my father briefly. Long story short, he lives alone but myself and my brother take turns to visit daily and my uncle will pop in when he can. However, my dads neighbours have been contacting me more and more frequently about my dads behaviour when we are not there. He has severe delusions about people being after him, and has been confronting neighbours and their visiting family members out in the street very aggressively. Nobody is spared, taxi drivers dropping people off, even a neighbour holding his 1 year old daughter in his arms was confronted by my dad (was caught on their cctv). He has become a real risk to himself and others now and there is a doctor coming today to do a mental assessment, with hospital admission in mind. I feel awful and massively guilty, because in amongst all of the aggression, he can be very calm and seemingly harmless. But he can turn in an instant. Suppose im just venting but I havent slept properly in god knows how long and im starting to become ill myself. I dont know, I just want to know if anyone else has had their PWD put on a section and how did you cope :’(

 

[lollyc]

My Mum was sectioned for 14 weeks, following an aggressive outburst whilst in hospital. I won't lie, it was not a nice experience for any of us, but I can't see how there was any other option. She was also having paranoid delusions etc. In our case she had already been discharged twice from hospital with "nothing wrong", so this aggression did finally make them sit up and take notice.

 

[Kevinl]

The state needs so legal framework to detain someone, we do live in a free country.
The police can arrest you, you can be placed somewhere under the mental health act, usually section 2 or 3 (hence sectioned) or be subject to a deprivation of liberty safeguarding order (DoLS).
Without some due process you cant be held against your will, there other ways but sectioning and DoLS are the most usual on here in the UK.
K

 

[Helly68]

My mother was sectioned, when I was a child, becuase she had bipolar disorder and her behaviour made her a risk to herself. She later developed mixed dementia. Although the setioning process is very tough, we found that being in a secure environment, where a drug regime can be established (albeit that was for bipolar and not dementia), is very helpful when behaviour has reached a point where it is not safe for the person or those around them. She was established on a drug therapy that did make a difference, although with dementia it is probably more about mitigating some of the agression/distress. Hopefully if sectioned, it will allow your loved one to recieve treatment and oversight that probably isn't possible in another setting. I hope that helps.

 

[Skylark/2]

I am going through the process myself. The local mental health team issued a section 2 a couple of days ago after reviewing my husband in our home. My husband is verbally abusive and occasionally physical abusive towards me and sadly I felt threatened, taking refuge in my neighbours house and also locking myself in our car and calling the police. I am waiting for a bed for him to become available! He has Alzheimer’s and Memantine, an antipsychotic drug plus diazepam were not helping
As I understand it, he can remain in hospital for up to 28 days whilst assessments are made. Depending on the outcome (med plan in place ) he will be discharged back home or kept in for more observations and possibly into a care home. You will be kept informed and consulted at all times.
Do you have POA for financial and health and welfare? This might give you more clout when talking to social services about your father’s future.
personally, I feel guilty that I have reached this stage, end of my tether but I realise that I need professionals to help.
Good luck.

 

[maisiecat]

My husband managed to avoid being sectioned despite the fact in hospital he frequently hit the staff.
If your Dad is delusional this often results in psychotic episodes. He definitely needs a place of safety and a review of why it is happening and what they can use to help( medication). I think it is absolutely terrifying for them when it is happening.
Please don't feel guilty as doing your best for your Dad may not feel the most comfortable thing. It is the end result that matters.

 

[Jessbow]

Its hard, but probably the very best thing that can happen.
They will keep him safe, probably strip his meds right back to a base line and start from there.
When you get to the other end, you'll see it was worth the worry

Dont feel guilty- you'd seek help if he has tummy ache, or a fall and suspect broken wrist - its no different really, - seek the help he needs

 

[Veritas]

I am going through the process myself. The local mental health team issued a section 2 a couple of days ago after reviewing my husband in our home. My husband is verbally abusive and occasionally physical abusive towards me and sadly I felt threatened, taking refuge in my neighbours house and also locking myself in our car and calling the police. I am waiting for a bed for him to become available! He has Alzheimer’s and Memantine, an antipsychotic drug plus diazepam were not helping
As I understand it, he can remain in hospital for up to 28 days whilst assessments are made. Depending on the outcome (med plan in place ) he will be discharged back home or kept in for more observations and possibly into a care home. You will be kept informed and consulted at all times.
Do you have POA for financial and health and welfare? This might give you more clout when talking to social services about your father’s future.
personally, I feel guilty that I have reached this stage, end of my tether but I realise that I need professionals to help.
Good luck.

Under no circumstances should you feel guilty. It is shocking how you have had to put up with this dreadful situation, and you should not have to be waiting for a bed with a Section 2 already in place!

I hope your husband is admitted very soon, and that you are then able to take some to recoup your strength and consider what you want to do in future. Your husband will be safe; you have not been safe for months now. Please consider the option of him moving to a care home rather than coming back to you. What you have been expected to soak up over these months has been unacceptable.

 

[Veritas]

Hi All,

I have posted before about my father briefly. Long story short, he lives alone but myself and my brother take turns to visit daily and my uncle will pop in when he can. However, my dads neighbours have been contacting me more and more frequently about my dads behaviour when we are not there. He has severe delusions about people being after him, and has been confronting neighbours and their visiting family members out in the street very aggressively. Nobody is spared, taxi drivers dropping people off, even a neighbour holding his 1 year old daughter in his arms was confronted by my dad (was caught on their cctv). He has become a real risk to himself and others now and there is a doctor coming today to do a mental assessment, with hospital admission in mind. I feel awful and massively guilty, because in amongst all of the aggression, he can be very calm and seemingly harmless. But he can turn in an instant. Suppose im just venting but I havent slept properly in god knows how long and im starting to become ill myself. I dont know, I just want to know if anyone else has had their PWD put on a section and how did you cope :’(

A Section order is quite common, and there are many people on here who will understand very well your mixed feelings about it all. The main thing to hold on to is that he and others will be much safer, and your father can get the treatment he needs to reduce his distress.

 

[Skylark/2]

Under no circumstances should you feel guilty. It is shocking how you have had to put up with this dreadful situation, and you should not have to be waiting for a bed with a Section 2 already in place!

I hope your husband is admitted very soon, and that you are then able to take some to recoup your strength and consider what you want to do in future. Your husband will be safe; you have not been safe for months now. Please consider the option of him moving to a care home rather than coming back to you. What you have been expected to soak up over these months has been unacceptable.

Hi there,
Thank you for taking the time to reply.
we are sitting waiting for a Social Worker to arrive, collect and take us to a hospital A bed has become available!
I am going to take the opportunity whilst he is in the hospital, to look into and at some local care homes. Never been able to as he is always at my side!
He seems quite amenable to going, but I’m convinced he doesn’t understand that he will stay for a length of time.
Wish us luck, and thanks again.

 

[Banjomansmate]

🤞 It goes easily @Skylark/2 .

 

[Kevinl]

Good luck Skylark.
K

 

[SeaSwallow]

I know that it is probably hard to accept @Skylark/2 but it really is the best for both of you.

 

[Veritas]

Hi there,
Thank you for taking the time to reply.
we are sitting waiting for a Social Worker to arrive, collect and take us to a hospital A bed has become available!
I am going to take the opportunity whilst he is in the hospital, to look into and at some local care homes. Never been able to as he is always at my side!
He seems quite amenable to going, but I’m convinced he doesn’t understand that he will stay for a length of time.
Wish us luck, and thanks again.

Very best of good luck to you. At last you’ll have some respite from the burden you’ve been carrying for so long.

 

[Violet Jane]

@Skylark/2, I'm very pleased to read that your husband is going to be sectioned. At long last his behaviour is going to be properly addressed. You have been fobbed off and placated by services for far too long. You have been a prisoner in your own home with an abusive bully.

I hope that you won't feel the need to visit your husband all the time. You need a rest and time to recuperate. Perhaps you could have a few days away.

It's not for me to say what you should do but I would think very, very carefully about having your husband home again even if his behaviour appears to have been brought under control. In the hospital a whole team will be caring for him and he will be subject to their rules; he will not have the upper hand in an unfamiliar environment. Once he is home you will be alone with him again and he will be king pin / master of the household. On top of that, your history with services is such that you can't be confident that they will act promptly and decisively if the medication stops working / his behaviour becomes difficult again.

 

[maisiecat]

Hi @Skylark/2 , I am so glad that there is now some help for you. Your situation has been appalling and extremely dangerous and you need to now take a breath and spend some time looking after you.
Make sure that the places you are looking at can cope with your husband's behaviour.
I hope he settles and you can visit without further issues but if he remains as aggressive as he has been then just cut the visit short. You will not be helping him and he will be harming you.
Good luck

 

[Skylark/2]

Good evening everyone,
Just a quick update.
After waiting at home all day , ready to go, we were told that a bed was not available for my husband! The reason being there were not enough staff on the ward.
Hopefully we will try again tomorrow but as usual my husband has started to get agitated ( sundowning) and I am feeling uneasy, he could become aggressive.
Frustrated day and annoyed.

 

[KatFox]

@Skylark/2 I just want to send you a huge virtual hug - you are going through such a terrible time - please make sure you take care of yourself - when you get chance xx

 

[Rowan23]

So sorry to hear your in the same situation @Skylark/2 its heart breaking.
Similar situation today for us, the doctor didnt show. Another patient was a more severe case and the doctor was diverted last minute. We have to wait until Monday now and thats to be put on the waiting list for a bed. Such a horrible disease.

Thank you everyone for the replies, it helps massively knowing you arent alone in this

 

[Sarasa]

@Rowan23, things didn't work today. Do let the neighbours know things are in hand and ask them to contact the police if they have any concerns with your dad's behaviour.
@Skylark/2 , do keep yourself safe make sure you have your phone on you and if your husband starts threatening you again get away and call the police.
Services are really stretched so I think both of you are going to have to be like gnats and keep on buzzing and biting the relevant services.