Thanks yes I will be able to grit my teeth better now as I had my broken tooth fixed this week!Upsetting as it is just step back and accept that your loved one who you care for and protect will probably totally ignore you and have nothing but praise and love for the helicopter visitor.
From the fleeting visitors perspective its out of sight and out of mind with the occasional contact to purge their conscience.
It's difficult but you know the truth, the people who see your love one regularly knows the truth.
I'm not religious but it the eternal prodigal son.
If it gives your loved one some joy, and it might, just grit your teeth and know that you are doing the right thing.