Newbie- parent just diagnosed
- Thread starter MissM
- Start date
Welcome, I am new too
I just found out also and posted a few minutes ago.
Hi everyone just found out my mam has dementia and googling it found this forum and so here I am joining and trying to make sense of something that is so destructive .....
I just found out also and posted a few minutes ago.
Hello MissM and Katem . Welcome to TP
Please feel free to ask questions, we will do our best to help .
Even though you may well have known something was wrong, when you eventually are told it's some form of Dementia, it still comes as a terrible shock.
Their is an old thread on here about communication with the memory impaired, it might not be suitable now but you may well need it in the future
http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/show...ionate-Communication-with-the-Memory-Impaired
Please feel free to ask questions, we will do our best to help .
Even though you may well have known something was wrong, when you eventually are told it's some form of Dementia, it still comes as a terrible shock.
Their is an old thread on here about communication with the memory impaired, it might not be suitable now but you may well need it in the future
http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/show...ionate-Communication-with-the-Memory-Impaired
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Hi everyone just found out my mam has dementia and googling it found this forum and so here I am joining and trying to make sense of something that is so destructive .....
So sorry your going through this, it is a cunning, baffling disease. This site is awesome!
Hang in there.
Hello Miss M and Katem, a warm welcome to you both to Talking Point, so sorry you have need for us but glad you have joined
Now that you've introduced yourselves here it might be good for you both to begin your own threads. You will probably get more replies if you do that.
Click this link to see a list of our forums:
http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forum.php
Choose the most appropriate forum for you by clicking on the blue title. You can then click on the grey '+post new thread' button to start a new discussion.
Take care and best wishes-Chris
Now that you've introduced yourselves here it might be good for you both to begin your own threads. You will probably get more replies if you do that.
Click this link to see a list of our forums:
http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forum.php
Choose the most appropriate forum for you by clicking on the blue title. You can then click on the grey '+post new thread' button to start a new discussion.
Take care and best wishes-Chris
Thank you all for welcoming me
PS: I just realized I have not posted this under my first post which is :My 87 year old mother was just diagnosed with early dementia. Sorry for the confusion. I was trying to thank the people who responded to me. I don't really know where new people go to post. I am learning to navigate this forum. Today is my first day.
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Thank you so much, both of you, for your replies and for the warm welcome. To be quite honest, when you replied "yes, this is quite common", I literally had to leave my keyboard as I burst into tears. The feeling was "omg, it is what I thought, AND, "oh no, I wish it were me who sets her off because, that way, it would not be true. I guess it's called denial and I still have it. I say the words, but they aren't REAL yet. I know this is progressive and that what I have described is "small stuff".
She has already talked about having fears, she is very depressed, and I have found that if I move from one topic to another in conversation with her, I confuse her. I was hoping it was me actually. I could control that. Not this .. in addition to the rest of it.
I feel so bad for everyone on this site who has lost or is imminently losing someone be it to this disease and/or a combination of diseases. You know, my husband always says he wants to live to be 100. Well, I don't.
Thank you for the great link which I have copies and will print for personal use. You are all such special, loving people to do what you are doing. It takes the greatest love and strength. I hope I am up to it as my own health is far from good, and I need to say at the outset, that I am not doing major caretaking due to my own illness. But, I do what I can (which is nowhere near what I should do) and feel guilty all the time about that. I have a very angry brother who wants me to do direct caregiving in her home and I cannot do it.
Perhaps I cannot count myself as a caregiver. I do get food to her, I do call daily, I do try to get services (all of which she does not want), and I was far more active in the earlier years. This is going on for seven years .. heart failure, hospitalizations, surgeries, falls, and now ... dementia. I was good in the early years, but the last two, I have been virtually useless except for the above and financially. I am filled with guilt each and every day at wanting to do more yet unable to due to my own health. Sorry for rambling. Been holding this in for years now.
PS: I just realized I have not posted this under my first post which is :My 87 year old mother was just diagnosed with early dementia. Sorry for the confusion. I was trying to thank the people who responded to me. I don't really know where new people go to post. I am learning to navigate this forum. Today is my first day.
======================================================================================
Thank you so much, both of you, for your replies and for the warm welcome. To be quite honest, when you replied "yes, this is quite common", I literally had to leave my keyboard as I burst into tears. The feeling was "omg, it is what I thought, AND, "oh no, I wish it were me who sets her off because, that way, it would not be true. I guess it's called denial and I still have it. I say the words, but they aren't REAL yet. I know this is progressive and that what I have described is "small stuff".
She has already talked about having fears, she is very depressed, and I have found that if I move from one topic to another in conversation with her, I confuse her. I was hoping it was me actually. I could control that. Not this .. in addition to the rest of it.
I feel so bad for everyone on this site who has lost or is imminently losing someone be it to this disease and/or a combination of diseases. You know, my husband always says he wants to live to be 100. Well, I don't.
Thank you for the great link which I have copies and will print for personal use. You are all such special, loving people to do what you are doing. It takes the greatest love and strength. I hope I am up to it as my own health is far from good, and I need to say at the outset, that I am not doing major caretaking due to my own illness. But, I do what I can (which is nowhere near what I should do) and feel guilty all the time about that. I have a very angry brother who wants me to do direct caregiving in her home and I cannot do it.
Perhaps I cannot count myself as a caregiver. I do get food to her, I do call daily, I do try to get services (all of which she does not want), and I was far more active in the earlier years. This is going on for seven years .. heart failure, hospitalizations, surgeries, falls, and now ... dementia. I was good in the early years, but the last two, I have been virtually useless except for the above and financially. I am filled with guilt each and every day at wanting to do more yet unable to due to my own health. Sorry for rambling. Been holding this in for years now.
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Hi Missm and welcome. Sorry that you've had to join TP but you will find lots of help here. Good luck lindax
Hello to Both! I am relatively new here too and have already found it inspiring to read how others are coping. There is a wealth of experience and good advice here and not a little humour at the appropriate times. Come often- even the "smallest" worry will receive a sage and caring reply. X
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