My husband is 78 and we've been married for 57 years. His memory is poor, anger appears out of nowhere and he seems to have lost his inhibitions. The other day I saw extreme pornography on his computer and when I asked why in the world he was looking at that he said he'd stumbled across it and was curious. I asked if he knew that the type he was watching was illegal and that the police could arrive at the door and take away all our computers for checking - he said he didn't care. I told our son, who said he'd also seen it but hadn't wanted to worry me so I checked his history and he'd made over 100 searches for the stuff. (I've now put it in restrictive mode which he hasn't mentioned - I'm hoping he thinks the internet provider or the police have done it.)
He simmered for an hour and then blew up - I was threatened with selling the house, divorce, him changing his Will and violence. The next morning I went to the doctors and told her the whole sorry tale. Then she said, "So why are you here and what do you expect us to do about it?" I replied that it needed to be noted on his records and that some advice on how to cope with him would be helpful. Her reply to that was, "If he gets violent, phone the police." Naturally I came out feeling a lot worse than when I went in.
His temper has abated but he has asked our son to make an appointment at the solicitors for next week. He hasn't had a meal for 5 days now - I've been putting them on the table, telling him it's there but he refuses to eat. This evening I asked him to tell me when he felt ready to eat again and he replied that he had no intention of eating again and that a couple of biscuits a day will keep him alive for as long as he wants to be alive.
Sorry to ramble - any advice on where to go from here will be most welcome.
He simmered for an hour and then blew up - I was threatened with selling the house, divorce, him changing his Will and violence. The next morning I went to the doctors and told her the whole sorry tale. Then she said, "So why are you here and what do you expect us to do about it?" I replied that it needed to be noted on his records and that some advice on how to cope with him would be helpful. Her reply to that was, "If he gets violent, phone the police." Naturally I came out feeling a lot worse than when I went in.
His temper has abated but he has asked our son to make an appointment at the solicitors for next week. He hasn't had a meal for 5 days now - I've been putting them on the table, telling him it's there but he refuses to eat. This evening I asked him to tell me when he felt ready to eat again and he replied that he had no intention of eating again and that a couple of biscuits a day will keep him alive for as long as he wants to be alive.
Sorry to ramble - any advice on where to go from here will be most welcome.