1. mel

    mel Registered User

    Apr 30, 2006
    1,656
    Sheffield
    Dear jane
    i am so desperately sad for you ....please take comfort in the fact you gave your mum everything to the end and she is at peace now
    with all my love
    Wendy xx
     
  2. hawaii50

    hawaii50 Registered User

    Dear Jane
    Not much more to say Jane accept that I am sorry that your mum passed, but pleased that it was peaceful while she slept. I am sure she was so very pleased to be with you all when it was time for her to go. This has not been an easy time for you and your family but I pray for strength for you to get through the next few days.
    Thinking about you.
    Elspeth
     
  3. Tina

    Tina Registered User

    May 19, 2006
    420
    Dear Jane, I'm so sorry to hear of your mum's passing but so pleased she had a peaceful end surrounded by love. Wishing you comfort in knowing you and your family made her last days very special and hope the happy memories will provide solace in your sadness.
    Love,
    Tina
     
  4. Carolann

    Carolann Registered User

    Apr 19, 2006
    59
    Nottinghamshire
    Dear Jane,
    Thinking of you and your family at this sad time, take comfort from the fact that you had Mum at home with you and yours over the past few days.

    I will be think of you still during the days that are to come.

    Take care.
    Carolann
     
  5. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    Sorry to read that your mother pass away xx
     
  6. Nell

    Nell Registered User

    Aug 9, 2005
    1,170
    Australia
    Dear Jane,

    You and your family have done a wonderful thing for your dear Mum. In the sorrow of her passing, please take time to appreciate that she had her wish - to go with her family and her pets around her. To go in your sleep is the best way - be glad of that too. Your sadness will be immense but at least you have the comfort of knowing she is at peace now.

    Take care of yourself and the girls.
    Warm and caring thoughts are winging their way to you.
     
  7. jan.

    jan. Registered User

    Apr 19, 2006
    405
    Cheshire, UK.
    Dear Jane,

    I have been following your posts and found them so incredibly moving.

    Sending you and your family sincere condolences at this very sad time.

    No-one could wish for a more peaceful passing than what you provided for your precious mum, how proud she must have been to have such a very special, caring daughter as you to love and care for her, when she needed you the most.

    You have my greatest respect Jane. Please take care and look after yourself.

    Thinking of you,

    [[[[BIG HUGS]]]]]

    Love Jan. Xxx
     
  8. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi Janed

    I am so very sorry to hear of your Mums passing.

    You did everything you could for her and if it were me I can't think of a better way to go, than with loving animals around and caring family

    Take care
    Alfjess
     
  9. Taffy

    Taffy Registered User

    Apr 15, 2007
    1,314
    Dear Jane
    I have followed your posts and I am so sorry for your loss and grief.Much comfort will come from the knowledge that your mum got her wish and came home. Jane, I admire you so much for your courage love and devotion. You will be in my thoughts. Take care. Taffy
     
  10. carol

    carol Registered User

    Jun 24, 2004
    196
    Surrey/Hampshire
    Dear Jane,

    I am so sorry to read your sad news. Look after yourself.

    Much love, Carolx
     
  11. Gill W

    Gill W Registered User

    Jan 31, 2007
    190
    Co. Durham
    Jane,

    I'm so sorry to hear the news.

    Your devotion to your mum was nothing less than golden, and I'm sure she passed knowing that she was cherished by those beside her.

    Be kind to each other, thinking of you.

    Gill
    xx
     
  12. RussellC

    RussellC Registered User

    Jul 6, 2006
    47
    Dear Jane

    I am sorry to hear of the loss of your Mum.

    You have been inspirational in the care and love you showed her. I am sure she was comforted by being with those she loved at the end of her life.

    Take care of yourself.

    Russell
     
  13. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Jane, sad news but mum is in a better place now, free of pain and anguish.

    Time now for you and the family. You have been truly wonderful. God Bless,
     
  14. DeborahBlythe

    DeborahBlythe Registered User

    Dec 1, 2006
    9,223
    Dear Jane, very sorry indeed to hear your sad news. Please accept my sincerest sympathy and condolences, Love Deborah x
     
  15. janed

    janed Registered User

    Jul 28, 2005
    45
    cornwall
    Thankyou eveyone for your kindness.

    I have been trying to post for the last few days but either havnt had the time or have been too upset or distracted to write, mum died on sunday night at 11.15pm although officially she was declared by the doctor after 12 that night so her certificated date of death is 30th April 2007.

    I had been out for a couple of hours as Alice had recieved an award for her archery at a local charity award ceremony, Malcolm had been with mum whilst I was out they had been watching snooker together! I returned home at about 9.45pm and came in and went straight to the loo, Stan, Malcolms father had a brief chat with mum and held her hand, he left her as I returned to her room, ~I noticed he breathing was quite bubbly as it had been whilst she was in hospital, I made her comfy and sat her a bit more upright, then went to relax in the sitting room as I felt I needed to be on my own, i had spent a difficult night with her the night before as se was very unsettled and nothing I cold do seemed to help her, I felt that being with her yet unable to make her comfortable and relaxed was frustrating for mum as well as myself as she relied on me for evrytng and I was in this case unable to do what she needed. At about five past elemen I went to the bathroom and washed ect, as I came out Malcolm stepped out of mums room saying that she was fast asleep, I went into the room and immediately realised something was different, I knew she had gone and checked her breathing, I called to malcolm saying she had gone, he came back from the kitchen and said that he had seen her breathing, it became obvious that mum had passed away as Malcolm came out of the room and I went into it, she was still very warm, her mouth and eyes were open, I closed her eyes but they remained slightly open, then I asked Malcolm to fetch his father who lives over the road, Stan came in and looked at mum, he confirmed what I already knew, that she had passed away, but was confused that her eyes were closed, I explained that I had closed them. He sat with me for a short while one each side of her bed, the dogs laid on the floor. I called the doctor after about 10 minutes, then called myh cousin Angela, we chatted for a while then said goodbye, almost immediatley the doctor rang, he needed directions, I gave these and he arrived within 5 minutes, he checked mums pulse and eyes and agreed that she had died, he explained that because her GP had not told the after hours service that she was expected to die the coroner and police would have to be involved but assured me that she would be able to remain with us till the morning, he phoned the police and an officer arrived within about 5 minutes, he came in and I helped him to examine mums body to ensure she had not obvious wounds or injuries, then I had to give him information to fill in a form, he then explained that mum would hav e to be taken straight away to the local hospital, I was very upset because I wanted her to stay till the morning, I sat with her for about 1/2 to 3/4 of an hour till the duty undertakers arrived, they asked if I wanted to stay whilst they dealt with mum and I thought I did till they told me they had to put her into a white plastic body bag, I knew I could not bear to see this so went out of the room, Bertie mums dog was lying on the chair next to her bed, he wouldnt move and I had to pick him up and carry him out of the room, within a few minutes mum had been taken away, the undertakers had even left the door open, I suddenly felt very empty and alone.
     
  16. Nell

    Nell Registered User

    Aug 9, 2005
    1,170
    Australia
    Dear Jane,
    There are no words for these occasions. Your post was very beautiful and your pain is so obvious. Would that you could be spared it. Thinking of you.
     
  17. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    xxx(((hugs)))) xxxxxxx thank-you for shareing
     
  18. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Jane, thinking of you in your grief.

    Try to remember that your mum's suffering is over, you gave her the lovely peaceful end that she wanted, and you gave her all the love and care that you possibly could.

    It won't take the pain away, but it may give you some inner peace.

    Love,
     
  19. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,337
    Kent
    Dear Jane, there are so many people here for you. Feel free to post whenever you wish, whatever you wish. I only wish we could help you moe.

    You have born this journey so well, you have earned so much respect and admiration. But now you are grieving and that`s another painful process for you.

    Take care of yourself, look after yourself, be kind to yourself.

    With love
     
  20. janed

    janed Registered User

    Jul 28, 2005
    45
    cornwall
    today all the children came home, the girls were here yesterday but Jim had a birthday party at his dads, he was 10 today, I picked him and Ed up at 12.30 and we then went to watch Alice play in her Samba band, it was a nice afternoon, I feel I want to be with the children, today I went into a shop with Wendy, it was quite busy and after a while I felt breathless, as if I couldnt breathe deeply, I have felt this occasionaly over the last few days and I know its a panic attack and I have been able to get through them by breathing slowly and moving out of the situation, I'm scared that after the funeral Im going to be so lonely, my family will have gone back home, and the kids will be at their fathers, I dont like being on my own for long periods, although the dogs and cat will be good company. Whilst shopping today I saw several elderly people in wheelchairs (as mum was) I felt a sudden sense of lose and aloneness a cold chill throughout my body, its very strange and moving.

    I have asked the childrens father if they can stay untill weds morning, the day after the funeral, then go to his house for the remainder of the week, I dont think he was very happy abut this but coulodnt realy say anything.

    Very tired now, cat is asleep on me!! thanks for listening, J x
     

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