It's life Jim - but not as we know it!

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by jenniferjean, Sep 18, 2019.

  1. AliceA

    AliceA Registered User

    May 27, 2016
    2,505
    :):):)
     
  2. AliceA

    AliceA Registered User

    May 27, 2016
    2,505
    Do not worry. I kept an input chart. Then said damp, wet, soaked etc. The district nurse was quite happy with that. It is only to get an idea of what is needed. My husband wears pads in net pants. Mostly he is dry, Sod's law? Why the change another mystery!
     
  3. kindred

    kindred Registered User

    Apr 8, 2018
    2,278
    Not to worry, really, just do an approximation and fudge it. That was the advice of the continence team to me. The idea they said was to see what size/thickness of pads he needed. They also said everyone is horrified by the idea and they, the nurses, hated putting it to people.
    This is also so they can ration the pull ups or pads. Back in the day they just used to send out a lorry load of pads every few months. (I am not joking) but of course we are in the age of cuts and austerity now. warmest, Geraldine aka kindred.
     
  4. AliceA

    AliceA Registered User

    May 27, 2016
    2,505
    I seldom read a whole book. I may dip in but I prefer short articles. I have a few regular newsletters that cover interests I have.
    At one time I had time when my husband slept, now I am an old version of a young mum grabbing sleep whenever. I settle down as soon as the evening carer goes!
    I try and get as much sleep as a priority as I can, sometimes more than other nights.
    I do watch YouTube on my iPad, it is wealth of interviews, talks and Ted Talks fulfills the need to have something to stretch my mind.
    Basically I feel I have to just go with whatever happens, just as one routine seems OK, it is all change again!
     
  5. AliceA

    AliceA Registered User

    May 27, 2016
    2,505
    Well done!
     
  6. jenniferjean

    jenniferjean Registered User

    Apr 2, 2016
    539
    Female
    Basingstoke, Hampshire
    Thanks. My husband wears pull-ups. I can tell by the weight of them more or less how much he's needed them. It just saves the wet patches he used to get on his trousers after he'd been to the toilet.
     
  7. jenniferjean

    jenniferjean Registered User

    Apr 2, 2016
    539
    Female
    Basingstoke, Hampshire
    Thanks Geraldine. I was hoping that someone would know more about it than I could guess. That is why TP is so valuable to me.
     
  8. White Rose

    White Rose Registered User

    Nov 4, 2018
    112
    Having a chuckle at this thread - we've got people talking about reading (or not reading) and others discussing incontinence pads....!
     
  9. AliceA

    AliceA Registered User

    May 27, 2016
    2,505
    Ah, White Rose, well we are juggling with both ends at once. :p:(:) Carers live such exciting lives don't we.
    Or don't wee (till I have the pad on straight!)
    The nets and pads are what the NHS supply, the pull up are expensive to buy some worked better than others I found.
    As for reading I was sent a pre publish copy or the Four Paws of Success, a cat's guide to Buddhism.
    It is amusing as are the other with a bit of wisdom woven in. A bit about a care home was special.
     
  10. jenniferjean

    jenniferjean Registered User

    Apr 2, 2016
    539
    Female
    Basingstoke, Hampshire
    It does sound funny when you put it like that. As @AliceA says we are juggling with both ends. But seriously I really started this thread as a sort of record of my 'juggling' with my husband's dementia. So I tend to put things on as and when they happen.
     
  11. jenniferjean

    jenniferjean Registered User

    Apr 2, 2016
    539
    Female
    Basingstoke, Hampshire
    #71 jenniferjean, Nov 15, 2019
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2019
    What a night!
    Some time after 2 a.m. my husband got up to use the toilet. I normally let him go and then go and get him if he doesn't come back straight away. I heard a bang and rushed into the bathroom and found him on the floor. I struggled to get him up saying that I ought to pull the alarm and get some help but he said he was ok and didn't want me to. I managed to get him up and held on to him while he had a pee. But suddenly he was down again, too heavy for me to hold on to him. This time I did pull the alarm which goes through to the care centre. They said they'd call for an ambulance.
    While waiting for the ambulance my husband managed to get himself up although I told him to stay where he was. He managed to get to the bedroom and sat on the bed. When I looked around I found poo on the floor which explained the awful smell. I'm assuming that the shock of the fall made him mess himself. I knew I needed to change his pyjamas but he would need to get in the shower. I decided to wait until the ambulance got here in case he fell again.
    Once they were here I did get him in the shower. As he got up off the bed I saw that the mess had come through onto the sheet. After his shower I then wrapped him in a towel while I, with the help of a paramedic, changed the bed. She was good, changed the quilt a lot quicker than I can.
    The other paramedic checked my husband over while the bed was being made and then I got my husband back into bed. They decided to leave him where he was but instructing me to call again if there was any more problems. They think he may have just been not quite awake when he fell.
    He's now in bed trying to get back to sleep. I'm wide awake so thought I'm come on here and add it to my thread. The washing can wait until the morning.
     
  12. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,901
    Female
    Dundee
    Oh what a night you’ve had. I’m glad that you got the paramedics to help you. You must be exhausted now.
     
  13. Bunpoots

    Bunpoots Registered User

    Apr 1, 2016
    3,293
    Nottinghamshire
    I hope you’re both ok and you get some sleep.
     
  14. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,856
    Kent
    Glad to hear all`s well now and the paramedics were able to help you.

    It sounds to me as if your husband`s mobility is starting to go @jenniferjean just in case you weren`t already aware of this.

    It was the start of our troubles when my husband got up in the night, forgot he needed my help and fell. There again the paramedics were wonderful until it became a nightly event.

    I do hope I`m wrong.
     
  15. White Rose

    White Rose Registered User

    Nov 4, 2018
    112
    So awful for you, hope you get a some sleep tonight and this is just a one off. Good that the paramedics were so helpful.
     
  16. jenniferjean

    jenniferjean Registered User

    Apr 2, 2016
    539
    Female
    Basingstoke, Hampshire
    Update
    I managed to get about an hour and a half sleep but when I awoke my husband said he had a pain in his chest. I dressed and then asked him again and he said it hurt on his right side sort of between chest and stomach. I wondered if he'd strained himself with the fall but being aware that he also has an abdominal aneurysm I wasn't sure what to do and phoned 111. They decided to call out the ambulance again. They did a thorough check including an e.c.g. and asked to see where he fell. They have come to the conclusion that when he fell he has bruised a rib. So he is on paracetamol and needs to take things easy.
     
  17. jenniferjean

    jenniferjean Registered User

    Apr 2, 2016
    539
    Female
    Basingstoke, Hampshire
    He has a walker for outside but normally he's okay indoors.
     
  18. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,856
    Kent
    I remeber my grandmother falling and sustaining bruised ribs. She was a toughie but the pain was so severe she was frightened.

    I hope your husband is able to understand and manage the pain @jenniferjean
     
  19. jenniferjean

    jenniferjean Registered User

    Apr 2, 2016
    539
    Female
    Basingstoke, Hampshire
    Well I can't keep off here today. I've just had a phone call that's annoyed me. Maybe because it's a lack of sleep and I shouldn't let it get to me. But I've just phoned the DWP.
    Someone on here a while ago said that they thought I should be claiming the higher amount of AA. Then while I was speaking this morning to the paramedic, he too thought I should be claiming it. So while fresh in my mind I did phone.
    The guy was so off-hand and very abrupt. I pointed out that I'm having to put my husband to bed and also get him dressed in the morning. He asked if I had to see to him during the night and I said yes, usually a couple of times when he needs the toilet. He said that normally I would have to get up three or four times in order to qualify. He said he would send the forms but if I find that I don't qualify then I don't need to send the forms back.
    Okay, fine, but he didn't have to make me feel like I'm some kind of con merchant.
     
  20. Duggies-girl

    Duggies-girl Registered User

    Sep 6, 2017
    1,643
    Dad got turned down twice. They just sent him a standard refusal stating that his needs had not changed. I am good at form filling but obviously not good enough. We got it in the end but it was only thanks to dad's cancer nurse.

    I think it would be an idea to get some help with the form. Others have suggested Age UK or similar I think.

    Someone else may have other suggestions.
     

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