In despair!
- Thread starter LadyA
- Start date
I counted my chickens before they'd hatched, didn't I?! Half the morning drink (with his Ebixa in) went on a potted plant! He's been wandering around the house like a lost soul all morning. However, the PHN just phoned to say she's heard back from the nursing home support office. Confusion had arisen, they claimed, because they thought I was applying for a home care package (though I had clearly filled in the forms for nursing home support!) So now she has told them that this was supposed to be being fast tracked, they say it should be approved within four weeks.
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Sent from my C1905 using Talking Point mobile app
Couldn't agree more. Every Social Worker and OT should have to experience life at the sharp end. I can't offer practical help but can empathise...
Fingers crossed too although it makes typing very difficult! And sooner if possible....
Hope day improves xx
He's had his daily outing to the shops. He spotted beef & onion pies and wanted one, so I got one for his lunch and cut it up for him. He also became enthralled by the display of cut flowers in Tesco, so we bought a bouquet for the living room. Had a couple of sticky moments out when he didn't seem to remember how to get into the car, and then out of it again! He's snoozing now, and hopefully I will get my break this afternoon.
Sent from my C1905 using Talking Point mobile app
Sent from my C1905 using Talking Point mobile app
I'm guessing back end of a frog would put a spring back in your step?
Hahahahahahahahahaha! That made me laugh, 2Jays
....shame the tunnel is such a long one though.
I'm please to hear there is a spark of a chance though...
Yes indeed. It was such a relief to hear. But then of course, I realised - it does mean that when he goes to the nursing home that time, he won't ever be coming home again. I'm used, over the course of our marriage, to William going off on trips - and to be honest, those little windows of freedom from his domineering, controlling ways were such a lifeline, it used to be so depressing when he'd come back. But when he was put on Risperidone, he lost all those controlling ways -it was as if, for the first time since I've known him, his fear of what "they" thought, or might think, or might do, left him and his own real personality could shine through. He was so much nicer. But anyway - I've been used, apart from the last 3 or so years, to him going away and coming back. When his dementia made travelling alone too much of a risk, one of his grandsons used to accompany him - bless him! Can't have been much of a holiday for him! So, I am sure it's going to be pretty devastating when it actually comes to him going to a nursing home, and not coming home again.
Ah LadyA, that's when you are going to need all of your courage and all of your indomitable spirit to the fore. Any words of comfort I can offer will sound so hollow, but they are wished for you nonetheless. You don't need me to tell you that some of your strength will be gained here from the people who have known you and your dear one for so long and from such as me who are new here and starting on our own journeys through this agonising disease. You are wished SO very much: a speedy entry, finally, for William to long-term care, a resolution for you of sorts and, as I see it, most importantly of all, a time of peace for you. With love. Shelagh x
Ah LadyA, that's when you are going to need all of your courage and all of your indomitable spirit to the fore. Any words of comfort I can offer will sound so hollow, but they are wished for you nonetheless. You don't need me to tell you that some of your strength will be gained here from the people who have known you and your dear one for so long and from such as me who are new here and starting on our own journeys through this agonising disease. You are wished SO very much: a speedy entry, finally, for William to long-term care, a resolution for you of sorts and, as I see it, most importantly of all, a time of peace for you. With love. Shelagh x
Thank you Shelagh. I know it is the right thing to do, and it must be done. The CPN told me straight out recently that, no offence to me, but he is not getting the level of care that he needs now here at home. I could not possibly give him the level of care that he needs now by myself, and even having a care assistant coming in once a day is not enough - even if it was increased to twice a day, or more, that still wouldn't be enough to give him the kind of care he needs. He needs the care the nursing home can give him - the stimulation, the company - and the constant prodding with bits of food! Breakfast, mid morning snack, lunch, soup in mid afternoon, tea, snack before bed. Partly it's for the entertainment & social value of going to eat and partly for those with small appetites and who are reluctant to eat - they tend to nibble even small amounts with all the others, several times a day, where they might not sit and eat a good meal. I simply couldn't keep that up on my own. Not to mention all the activities - which are all group activities anyway. The physiotherapy. Can't be done. So, even though he won't like it, and it will take a good while I'm sure for him to settle, it must be done.
That grazing sounds ideal! When I think of all the most contented field animals, they are all grazers, so why shouldn't the humans benefit too. Yes, the stimulation and the constant energy of numerous staff will surely be good for him. Usual shift patterns are eight hours. And yours is..................oh yes, 24/7. Time to step back a little and know that " all will be well and all manner of thing will be well ". Promise me you'll still be here; I know I'm going to need you (all) sometime? My loving thoughts to you especially LadyA. X
That grazing sounds ideal! When I think of all the most contented field animals, they are all grazers, so why shouldn't the humans benefit too. Yes, the stimulation and the constant energy of numerous staff will surely be good for him. Usual shift patterns are eight hours. And yours is..................oh yes, 24/7. Time to step back a little and know that " all will be well and all manner of thing will be well ". Promise me you'll still be here; I know I'm going to need you (all) sometime? My loving thoughts to you especially LadyA. Shelagh X
I imagine I'll probably need TPers just as much when he's in a nursing home situation! The situation will be different, in that I will be getting sleep and not having the constant wearing down of trying to get meds in to William, trying to get him dressed, trying to get incontinence pads changed when he won't allow me to etc. but I'm sure there will be a whole new set of concerns to take their place! Especially as time goes on.
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