Hello Jenniferjean, I am trying to put my behaviour behind me, it scared me so much that I lost control, but it happened and I know I will not be the same as it just broke me. I feel broken but must move on and face what's in front. Over the years I have faced many tragedies and learned to be strong for others needed me and kept my emotions in check, I fear they are catching up now. In the quiet of the morning I weep, the tears just come from nowhere, not for long, but I think of it as a safety valve and hope it helps. I luckily don't need to lock myself away as JH doesn't get up till noon and I'm awake from the wee small hours. Are you like me and miss someone to just hug you and tell you it'll all be OK? It probably will be all OK one day but no good comes from it. What a destructive illness this is.Francy I'm glad you had a good quiet Christmas. But I can see by today's post that you are still feeling guilty about your outburst the other day. Don't be, as others have said we all do it. You need to forget it now. The one thing about dementia is that the patient will forget it happened. My favourite place in the house is the bathroom, because I can go in and shut the door and have a good cry.
I hope we are all survivors, we've come this far. May the new year ahead bring us all some peace and happiness.
XXXX Francy