It is great to know that things look a bit brighter for him now. Living so far away, regretfully our ability to provide practical help to the family has been limited, but it is good to know that so many of you can give Burf the understanding and advice that is so valueable at this time. At that time no one discussed the condition, and one was just left to cope with the stress it involved. How things have moved on, now that the condition is "out in the open"!
(I'll leave you to explain.)
and it has two windows which both look out onto a courtyard/garden. It is not a big room and is not en-suite but it is beautifully decorated and nice and clean. He is just stating that he is going back home and will marry his partner and they can get a house together and will not under any circumstances move up to be closer to me. So, what do I tell him when it is time to move him over to the new CH, because he will refuse to go (even though he agreed to a 4 week trial with the SW which he nows says he didn't ). I genuinely feel as though dad thinks he is being locked away. Sad to say though, if my experience yesterday was anything to go by, I'm not sure that I want to take him out of the CH for visits/trips it just causes so much upset. Even whilst he has been in his current CH he has said there is nothing to do here, it is just so boring, sitting around all day. I find the thought of that is very upsetting.
Yes dad will have his own room on the ground floor
)....It's not always acause for concern, Burf..Managers do move on..and I assume there's a deputy running things. I think I'd like to how long the home has been managerless..if possible why the previous manager left..and what they are doing about filling the post.
The meeting went well, albeit over an hour late (poor hubby had to be rung at short notice again to collect the children from school and pre-school). The area manager did the assessment. He basically talked to dad, explained about the home etc. Dad did not seem to be particularly concerned about anything that was mentioned. and began answering the questions as such. Such answers as "I'm the right man for the job and I won't let you down. The area manager took it all in his stride and stepped into "dad's world". End result, manager is happy to take dad on a 4 week trial and believes that he will fit in. Also, music to my ears, the area manager stated "without any prompting from me" that for dad's placement he had waived the top up fee and that was a permanent arrangement. (I need a backwards flip smilie here!!) It is all arranged that dad moves in on a trial basis this Thursday.(Collapse in a heap, nearly at the finish line smilie). 
It has got to be done though. This makes the mental capacity a waste of time. Dad will always say that he does not want to stay and wants to go back home. So, when and how it is decided that dad stays in full time care. I am currently still "running" his house (paying rent and bills) but obviously from today onwards all of dad's pension apart from £20 a week will be taken off him to pay for his care. So, how long am I expected to keep his house going. I can't pack it away if there is a chance that dad might still be sent home.
