Hello again. :(

silver'lantern

Registered User
Apr 23, 2019
166
OH MY DAYS.....no matter what we are going through new baby news puts a smile on the day. big brother looks very pleased to meet him
 

jugglingmum

Registered User
Jan 5, 2014
5,513
Chester
Beautiful photo @LadyA. Thank you for posting. It must make you so happy.

I probably said this when your older grandson was born but dau had a shock of black hair just like that. It is now dark brown (well the bits that aren't blue)
 

LadyA

Registered User
Oct 19, 2009
13,562
Ireland
Beautiful photo @LadyA. Thank you for posting. It must make you so happy.

I probably said this when your older grandson was born but dau had a shock of black hair just like that. It is now dark brown (well the bits that aren't blue)
The older boy's hair is now dark brown too. His eyes are almost black. It will be interesting to see how new baby's eyes turn out.
 

alzCaregiver21

New member
Dec 19, 2018
5
Hello, I am wondering if your mom's rash is still persistent? My mom had a rash also (she is 75 years old and has advanced dementia), and what cured this rash was applying liquid coconut oil directly to the rash. The brand that I used was Louana's liquid oil. I hope that this helps! Thanks.
 

father ted

Registered User
Aug 16, 2010
694
London
Nice to see your name pop up LadyA, hope your Mum continues to improve. I can quite understand your not wanting to revisit caring 24/7.
 

LadyA

Registered User
Oct 19, 2009
13,562
Ireland
Thought I'd give a little update on things here.

Mum has now made an Enduring power of Attorney, which is very expensive, and a lot more complicated here than I understand it is in the UK. It can't be registered unless mum loses mental capacity permanently. permanent loss of capacity would, at that stage, have to be certified by her Solicitor and her doctor. It's a relief to have it in place, just in case.

Mum is more or less stable. @alzCaregiver21 (sorry, I didn't see your reply until now), mum's rash is mostly caused by psoriasis, which she's had all her life. The purple rash on her lower legs which she had when she went to hospital in August was caused by sepsis, which thankfully, she recovered from.

She didn't recover the level of mobility she had before her illness. She needs the walking frames in the house (dear God, I wish she would not go staggering around the house without them! :rolleyes:), a wheelchair for going outside and the stairlift for getting to the bathroom/bedroom. She is also inclined to be more forgetful and gets a bit confused about days/times etc. Of course, that's easy to do, when you are more or less housebound. I had hoped she would get back, mentally, to where she had been before her illness, but she's back to maybe 85/90%, which is good, although the slight decline is quite noticeable. She also seems to be a lot more susceptible to colds and coughs than she used to be. She doesn't cook anymore, my sisters in law and I bring her a good dinner each day, she makes her own breakfast (cereal & instant coffee), and she gets a snack during the day if she wants it, a sandwich or something. Her weight loss is worrying, but I think it's just age and frailty. She's on supplements, but she's down to about 47kg. She hasn't been out and about much over Winter, as she feels the cold terribly. However, once the weather stabilises a bit here, and it's not so very windy and wet, I'm going to take her out somewhere. Even if only to a shopping centre or somewhere.

Meanwhile, dau's family also take a lot of my time. This baby, too, doesn't sleep, except for short naps through the day and night! However, as I say to her, time passes so very fast, blink and you'd have missed them growing up.

So, all in all, things are fairly good. "As good as can be expected" as they say. :)
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
60,486
Dundee
It’s nice to hear from you @LadyA and to read your update. I’m glad that your mum and the rest of your family are doing as well as they can.

Take care.
 

LadyA

Registered User
Oct 19, 2009
13,562
Ireland
It’s nice to hear from you @LadyA and to read your update. I’m glad that your mum and the rest of your family are doing as well as they can.

Take care.
You know what, though @Izzy ? I have found that those years of caring for someone with dementia (and as you know, my husband's form of dementia was not easy), seems to have fundamentally changed me. I find myself being sort of isolationist. I find large, jolly groups just get on my nerves. parties etc., I just find myself in the background, thinking "What the heck is this all for? All this jollity, and shrieking?". I enjoy socialising with one, maybe two, people at a time. But put me in a group and I retreat into myself, and just about can't cope. I have and will continue to, do group socialising when I have to. But I'd much rather not. And if I do, I prefer to be involved and useful, than just a guest. My home has become my sanctuary. I don't get to spend enough time here, so my evenings at home with just me and the cats, are something I treasure. However, I do recognise that I could become totally isolated in time, and that this would not be good for me, so I do make a big effort (now and again!).

I'm thinking recently about how long I've been doing this "caring" thing. It started with dad, although mum did the bulk of his care (he had a form of cancer), I was the one who took him to and from hospitals, clinics, chemo etc. etc. etc. By the time he died, almost 20 years ago, my husband was showing the first symptoms. And by the time he died, , mum was needing more care. "do you work?" I'm asked regularly. :rolleyes::rolleyes::D:D
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
2,564
You know what, though @Izzy ? I have found that those years of caring for someone with dementia (and as you know, my husband's form of dementia was not easy), seems to have fundamentally changed me. I find myself being sort of isolationist. I find large, jolly groups just get on my nerves. parties etc., I just find myself in the background, thinking "What the heck is this all for? All this jollity, and shrieking?". I enjoy socialising with one, maybe two, people at a time. But put me in a group and I retreat into myself, and just about can't cope. I have and will continue to, do group socialising when I have to. But I'd much rather not. And if I do, I prefer to be involved and useful, than just a guest. My home has become my sanctuary. I don't get to spend enough time here, so my evenings at home with just me and the cats, are something I treasure. However, I do recognise that I could become totally isolated in time, and that this would not be good for me, so I do make a big effort (now and again!).

I'm thinking recently about how long I've been doing this "caring" thing. It started with dad, although mum did the bulk of his care (he had a form of cancer), I was the one who took him to and from hospitals, clinics, chemo etc. etc. etc. By the time he died, almost 20 years ago, my husband was showing the first symptoms. And by the time he died, , mum was needing more care. "do you work?" I'm asked regularly. :rolleyes::rolleyes::D:D
I feel a kindred spirit here, I shop at quiet times. Avoid noisy busy places, enjoy smaller groups of people & object to being told I should socialise more by those busy posting their “wonderful”lives all over social media!
Intelligent conversation for a short period of time stimulates & gives the grey cells enough on top of everything else! I don’t need the burbling masses & social media likes etc to feel validated.
yes caring changes everything, new perspectives on life that can only be truly appreciated by those who experience this disease.
my home is like yours my sanctuary, & now slowly painting it wall by wall it’s comforting calmness is working its magic!