1. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    More long standing members will know me all too well! I don't log in much these days, since my husband died four years ago. However.

    My mum has been doing well for her age/state of health. Getting a bit more forgetful and occasionally confused, but nothing to cause any concern about her capacity or ability to live on her own. Until last weekend. She fell and broke an ankle. The hospital put one of those "boot" things on, so that (and I distinctly remember the nurse saying this) "you can just put a little weight on it when you are being transferred bed/chair/commode". She said if they put a full cast on, mum wouldn't be able to weight bear on it.

    Mum's been urine incontinent for several years due to kidney/bladder problems. She had a urine infection recently, treated with antibiotics, which (we think it was those) brought her out in an awful rash. Anyway, by Tuesday morning when I got there, it was to find mum totally delirious, out of bed with the "boot" taken off and taken apart, having got herself across the room and dragged the commode back to the bed, moved a bedside table, and drawn the curtains! Her gp called an ambulance, and she's in hospital since. During the week, the family were convinced she wouldn't be coming home again, that she'd have to go to full time care. She had no clue what was going on, where she was, was hallucinating and having delusions about where she was/what was happening, etc. The hospital say it's a urine infection, and have been flooding her with antibiotics. Her chart (I peeked at it!) says "uro sepsis". Thankfully, yesterday, she was much better. Weak as a kitten, and has no appetite, but only wandered off track a couple of times.

    Fingers crossed that she recovers enough to go back to independent living again! I found that her hallucinations and delusions just brought the hell my husband (and I) went through with his dementia, and I was having panic attacks, and realised I just can't go there again.
  2. Bunpoots

    Bunpoots Registered User

    Apr 1, 2016
    I hope your mum makes a good recovery @LadyA. I’m hoping I never have to deal with dementia again either!
  3. 2jays

    2jays Registered User

    Jun 4, 2010
    West Midlands

    I’m am so sorry to read this :(

    Hoping that she feels better soon and that you are getting the support that you need

    Much love xxxx
  4. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    Oh @LadyA I’m so sorry to read about your mum. I can well understand the anxiety you must feel given what you have already gone through with dementia. Both my mum and Bill suffered terribly from UTIs and they were really different characters while suffering from one. I do hope the antibiotics do the job well and your mum is able to return to her previous level of independence.
  5. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    I’m so sorry to read about your Mum @LadyA. I hope your Mum improves quickly.
  6. LynneMcV

    LynneMcV Volunteer Moderator

    May 9, 2012
    south-east London
    I hope your mother makes a full recovery @LadyA. I know how distressing it can be to see someone with that degree of delirium. It is good that she seems to be recovering and hopefully she will soon be stronger and able to manage as before.

    I fully understand your panic at the memories brought back from caring for your husband through hallucinations and anxieties.

    Something triggered a similar reaction in me recently - and if it is what I think it is, I don't think I could go back there either.
  7. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    oh @LadyA what a worry for you
    thank goodness your mum has you and family looking out for her and you visited that morning
    here's hoping your mum stays more settled and recuperates well
  8. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    South coast
    Im so sorry @LadyA

    Im not surprised that is bringing back bad memories.
    I hope your mum will be OK soon.

    PS - is it really 4 years since Bill died?
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    Oh I`m so sorry @LadyA. All I can hope is the antibiotics take effect and once the UTI is cleared your mum will be a bit better.

    My friend was fitted with a boot when she broke a bone in her foot. I couldn`t believe how heavy it was and my friend kept taking it off too.

    There`s nothing I can say which you don`t already know. It`s said falls are particularly serious for older people and unfortunately, this has shown to be true.
  10. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    So sorry @LadyA what a worry for you, I hope things settle down and Mum regains some independence
  11. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    Thanks all.
    And today, mum was, although extremely weak, more or less her old self, mentally. She's a bit confused I think by memories of hallucinations/delusions. She's not sure if something was real or not. The physiotherapist was in this morning, and had mum out walking on a frame. Mum told me that she told the staff that her daughter (me!) goes in every day and does all her cooking, cleaning and shopping! I said "Mum! we are trying to get you some help at home! If you tell them I'm doing everything, they will decide you don't NEED outside help!" Then I had a good chat with a nurse and the physio. She'll have the boot on for another three weeks, but can take it off at night. She's so very weak though. And feeling terribly cold. Literally, shaking and trembling. Anyway, the physio said their aim is to get mum back to the level of independence she had before. So, fingers crossed!
  12. jugglingmum

    jugglingmum Registered User

    Jan 5, 2014
    So sorry to read this @LadyA - I'm sure it brought back memories.

    Here's to hoping she makes a good recovery back to where she was before.
  13. Sam Luvit

    Sam Luvit Registered User

    Oct 19, 2016
    East Sussex
    Hopefully things will return to normal very soon @LadyA, urinary sepsis took a while to get over for mum, thankfully she didn’t have any hallucinations though. Will be thinking of you and sending good vibes to keep you going ;)
  14. jaymor

    jaymor Volunteer Moderator

    Jul 14, 2006
    Hope today brings further improvement for your Mum @LadyA and you some comfort.
  15. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    Thanks all.
    Yesterday, she was better again. Although she told me she was "cleared to go home. Today, if I want. " Checked with the staff, who assured me that no, she wasn't! The nurse said "She has expressed a wish to go home, but she is still being treated, and needs more work with the physio, so won't be discharged yet." Mentally, she's back to herself, although they say there are signs of the early stages of dementia. Fingers crossed that she will get back to the level of independence that she had.
  16. 2jays

    2jays Registered User

    Jun 4, 2010
    West Midlands
    Sinking feeling in tummy moment on hearing that. Not something you wanted to hear either I guess :(

    I do hope your mum regains her level of independence soon
  17. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    It will be important to see how your mum accepts the physio @LadyA . It`s good the hospital is not wanting her to leave too soon.
  18. MaNaAk

    MaNaAk Registered User

    Jun 19, 2016
    Dear Lady A,

    I remember some years ago when you replied to one of my threads saying that it sounds like your dad's dementia is progressing and you hoped that I had the right care in place. Dad passed away in June and I can't believe that I nursed him through to putting him in a home and then I did my best for him for the 11 months that he was there. You supported me as a carer on this forum now I want to try to support you.

    I hope your mum feels better soon and I hope that the family are supportive. Please let us know how you are all getting on.

  19. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    Toronto, Canada
    @LadyA, I'm sorry I missed this. I hope your mother continues to improve. It must be scary for you.
  20. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    On Thursday afternoon, the OT rang me to feel out the situation with mum, and her needs. She was very helpful. Asked for details of any help mum already has, so they can see about adding to it. Also said that mum had said about me doing all her cleaning & cooking, but she was checking that with me! So, thankfully, they weren't just taking mum's word for it! She said about the Grants available for things like a ramp, or doing a bathroom etc, but she said funds have been cut to the bone for everything, so there's a long waiting time for that, but she gave me the name of a company that do temporary ramps. So, we'll look into that. She's also going to refer mum to the Old Age Care clinic and arrange for the mini mental tests and a full assessment for mums increasing forgetfulness - to see if she's suitable for being prescribed something like Aricept. And she said that once mum's medically fit for discharge, they are trying to arrange rehab for her somewhere, until she gets the boot off. And they will talk to mum about that, so it will be their fault and not mine! So reality is that mum more than likely won't be home for another three weeks or so.

    Yesterday, when I was with mum, she said the Consultant had been in with her, and had talked to her about when she's discharged. He told her that she wouldn't be able to go straight home, but that they wanted her to go to Rehab until the boot comes off. Mum said she didn't want to, but he has persuaded her that it is necessary, in order to get her back to her previous level of independence. Mum's sister says that mum told her that she is afraid that once you go into "one of those places" (Rehab would be done in a nursing home), that you never get to go home again. So, we've all been reassuring her that it's just temporary until she's back on her feet, because we don't want her falling again.

    I had said that she's back to where she was before the fall, mentally. Tbh, though, I do think she has slipped a bit. Or, it could be the disorientation of being in hospital, which does put you in a bit of a Twilight Zone!

    Here's the interesting bit though: Mum's been urine incontinent for several years. It has gotten increasingly worse, and she was using about six pads a day. She said she still feels the urge to pee, but was constantly "leaking" too. At night, she said, she would get up to the toilet at least twice, and change her pad each time, and still, her pad would be soaked to leaking point in the morning. However, with the infection she's had now, the hospital had flooded her with IV antibiotics, followed by oral antibiotics. And mum says that her incontinence is not nearly as bad! She said that now, most mornings, the pad is dry, and she isn't leaking nearly as much during the day, either! So, we're hoping that her incontinence was mostly caused by a low lying infection, and that this intensive treatment has nailed it.

    The hospital said mum would do better in pull ups rather than the pads they use, so I said I'd bring some. I knew mum had some at home, but before going out for them, I happened to be in Aldi. Who knew?? Aldi do their own brand of incontinence pants! €5.99 for a pack of nine. So, I got one pack to see if they are any good.

    Also, mum's been approved for two visits a week from a Carer Assistant, to help her with showering etc. However, they say that they don't know if they can hold on to the hours assigned to her for the two or three weeks she'll be in Rehab, so they may have to apply again for it! Fingers crossed!

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