When mum is well (in hospital at the moment) she has a carer come in in the morning to get her up as mornings are hateful for her, we were really not getting along and she was giving me all sorts of grief. The plan is that I have to time the taking of the wake up cup of tea for five minutes before the carer is due (a beep on the phone as she enters the road). Then when the carer arrives mum needs a wee (no matter she is in incontinence pads, she needs a wee and these happen in the bathroom (so far!)). She goes into the bathroom, carer joins her "while we are here let's wash/shower" and I pass fresh clothes through the door, which are hung on the radiator to warm up. Fresh clothes have been sourced the day before and put in a holding position in the utility room - a room mum has not discovered as the door is too heavy for her to open. So far it's worked although of course I do have to search the house every day for the usual tissues, kitchen towel, incontinence pants, discarded bits of clothing, sweet wrappers, etc. etc.