Clean clothes!

[Sammie234]

It’s like winning the lottery when I persuade OH to get a shower the other day I said we were catching the bus to local village to see daughter oh ok says he,what time 30 mins said I, do I need a shave says he, well you could actually do with a shower says I not expecting either to occur not in the time frame anyway. He just says ok and goes and gets a shave and a shower miracle of miracles, obviously missed the bus so had to wait another hour but we eventually got out

 

[Rolypoly]

It’s like winning the lottery when I persuade OH to get a shower the other day I said we were catching the bus to local village to see daughter oh ok says he,what time 30 mins said I, do I need a shave says he, well you could actually do with a shower says I not expecting either to occur not in the time frame anyway. He just says ok and goes and gets a shave and a shower miracle of miracles, obviously missed the bus so had to wait another hour but we eventually got out

A small price to pay

 

[Mudgee Joy]

I think my husband is improving ! He now sometimes asks for fresh undies ! Every little helps - enjoyed reading the above -,x

 

[rhubarbtree]

Our bedroom has become a silent battlefield. OH does not like taking all his clothes off to put pyjamas on so removal of each item has to be encouraged. If the said clothes are left on the chair he will often get up in the night, put them on and get back into bed. Or he will quickly dress while I am in the shower so as to avoid a shower himself. So I devised a devious plan (a la Baldrick)- when he got into bed and settled down I would whip said clothes off to spare room. It worked for a while then he discovered them, so I started hiding them in the bottom of a wardrobe. He has not found that hiding place but now lays in bed watching me. I determine to get up once he is asleep but usually fall asleep first. Hence this morning he was fully dressed in bed. Not sure what I will do tonight.

What amuses me is that this is all done without any conversation or discussion. A devious mime.

We did have a battle of wills last week. When I said it was time for a shower and he would not get out of bed, said "in a minute" "later" etc. He did get quite nasty. I said "Well I am going to sit here on my ipad and wait for you to get up, so I can help you". Within three minutes he sat up and said in the pleasantest voice "Well I suppose its time I was up" as if the previous conversations had not taken place.

 

[Rolypoly]

You could always try putting another pair of pjs on the chair and see if he notices during his nocturnal change . Short of that, put all his clothes up in the loft
The things we have to do to keep them clean (well, cleanish)

 

[Bunpoots]

I read in the newspaper at the weekend that men, on average, wear their underpants for three days so he’s in good company

My dad says he only changes his underpants once a week... And his trousers once a year!!!

 

[MorryLou]

Hi All
I'm having trouble with my Mum. I thought she was washing her clothes but lately has started to stockpile them and hiding her dirty laundry. I spent days sorting this out.
I am awaiting an assessment for a bathing lift which will hopefully be a godsend (at present she can't get in or out of the bath) and my Mum hates the shower. Lately she has been giving every excuse not to have one, from suddenly feeling unwell, to being too tired to have one, will definitely have one tomorrow etc, but it has been 2 and a half weeks now and quite frankly she smells.
I will give her an ultimatum this weekend, but don't have a lot of hope. didn't ever think this would happen but it seems common.

 

[Rolypoly]

My dad says he only changes his underpants once a week... And his trousers once a year!!!

At least it isn’t the other way round

 

[gotanybiscuits?]

At least it isn’t the other way round

Maybe they go to inside-out when it's his birthday?

 

[rhubarbtree]

You could always try putting another pair of pjs on the chair and see if he notices during his nocturnal change . Short of that, put all his clothes up in the loft
The things we have to do to keep them clean (well, cleanish)

Agreed Rolypoly. We do have to keep them cleanish. Before I started supervising OH had a rash which might have been scabies. Cleared up now thank goodness. Cannot put clothes in loft as we sleep there already! (loft conversion). No problem last night as he was so tired from day centre he was settled down before I got in. Am going to clear a shelf in my wardrobe to store his day's clothes. Will have to be careful when I put them away though.

Reading this thread reminded me of when they asked Peter Ustinov what old age was like and he said something along the lines of - It's like having breakfast every five minutes. And time does fly as your get older. Must be confusing for PWD to be constantly asked to take their clothes off.

The other night I said to OH "Right take all your clothes off" and he replied "I don't think that's a good idea".

 

[Fullticket]

When mum is well (in hospital at the moment) she has a carer come in in the morning to get her up as mornings are hateful for her, we were really not getting along and she was giving me all sorts of grief. The plan is that I have to time the taking of the wake up cup of tea for five minutes before the carer is due (a beep on the phone as she enters the road). Then when the carer arrives mum needs a wee (no matter she is in incontinence pads, she needs a wee and these happen in the bathroom (so far!)). She goes into the bathroom, carer joins her "while we are here let's wash/shower" and I pass fresh clothes through the door, which are hung on the radiator to warm up. Fresh clothes have been sourced the day before and put in a holding position in the utility room - a room mum has not discovered as the door is too heavy for her to open. So far it's worked although of course I do have to search the house every day for the usual tissues, kitchen towel, incontinence pants, discarded bits of clothing, sweet wrappers, etc. etc.

 

[rhubarbtree]

Fullticket - that is a military operation. So tiring though and it is only the start of the day.

You say about Mum not being able to open utility door. How I wish I had had star locks put on a couple of doors when we had the builders in. It would be such a help to be able to look my office/spare room upstairs.

 

[Rolypoly]

We are looking after daughter’s dog today. He likes to lick anyone within tongue distance and has woken mum up before by licking her face - does that count as a wash?

 

[Grahamstown]

We are having a relatively tranquil weekend after the trauma of the collapse and hospital admission last week. The new cotton dressing gown is coming into its own because he likes the comfort of it next to him under the duvet and now he is no longer sweating profusely as he did with the polyester one. I can see that the collapse has made another impact on his memory. He has very little recall of the event and has forgotten about the tablets he was prescribed although he can remember to take the ones he already had. He is not allowed to drive but doesn’t seem too concerned at present.

 

[Bunpoots]

We are looking after daughter’s dog today. He likes to lick anyone within tongue distance and has woken mum up before by licking her face - does that count as a wash?

If it does I'm going to get dad a dog

 

[rhubarbtree]

Refusal to shower again today but the "I am on i-pad just waiting to help" worked again. Up now showered and shaving as I type. One worrying comment was "I want to apologise for all the bad things I have done in the house". He was up and about in the night. What am I going to find downstairs?
The start of another week. Hope it is as good as can be for everyone.

 

[Grahamstown]

Oh dear he has found an old polyester dressing gown and put that between the sheet and duvet, and this morning the sheet was drenched with sweat. Tonight I have insisted that he does not use that one but the cotton one. He must be roasting with a 13 tog down duvet plus a hot water bottle and two dressing gowns. The house is really toasty too so his temperature control must be poor and he really cooks overnight. The trouble is that I get cross and exasperated which makes him very unhappy. I managed to control myself and have a happy goodnight. He settles down much earlier than I do. Getting it out of my system helps.

 

[love.dad.but..]

Our bedroom has become a silent battlefield. OH does not like taking all his clothes off to put pyjamas on so removal of each item has to be encouraged. If the said clothes are left on the chair he will often get up in the night, put them on and get back into bed. Or he will quickly dress while I am in the shower so as to avoid a shower himself. So I devised a devious plan (a la Baldrick)- when he got into bed and settled down I would whip said clothes off to spare room. It worked for a while then he discovered them, so I started hiding them in the bottom of a wardrobe. He has not found that hiding place but now lays in bed watching me. I determine to get up once he is asleep but usually fall asleep first. Hence this morning he was fully dressed in bed. Not sure what I will do tonight.

What amuses me is that this is all done without any conversation or discussion. A devious mime.

We did have a battle of wills last week. When I said it was time for a shower and he would not get out of bed, said "in a minute" "later" etc. He did get quite nasty. I said "Well I am going to sit here on my ipad and wait for you to get up, so I can help you". Within three minutes he sat up and said in the pleasantest voice "Well I suppose its time I was up" as if the previous conversations had not taken place.

Your post takes me back to the same devious mime and charades I had to go through with my dad. It struck me then and still does nearly a year after he passed away...the mental effort and joined up thinking it must take to be devious when other simple tasks or routines are forgotten. Baffling

 

[Rolypoly]

Your post takes me back to the same devious mime and charades I had to go through with my dad. It struck me then and still does nearly a year after he passed away...the mental effort and joined up thinking it must take to be devious when other simple tasks or routines are forgotten. Baffling

I know. It doesn’t make sense.

 

[May30]

Hi,
My Dad gets recurring UTIs and I've put it down to the fact he refuses to change his wet underwear. He has a carer who helps him to wash and dress in the morning but when I am helping him to bed in the evening, he refuses to change them even though they are clearly wet. He gets very angry and distressed if I try and push the matter and he will say things like 'i might as well go and wander the streets' or 'i might as well jump out of the window'. I've started to just leave it to avoid the confrontation but want to try and prevent the UTIs as it makes his behavior worse, he's had two falls in the last week. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.