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Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by Casbow, Feb 3, 2017.
Thinking of you today Casbow x
Well I don't think he will go in today now. They cannot come and access him until between 3 and 4. It is at a bad time for traffic so don't know exactly what time. So even if they say yes I can't see me taking him over there. It is the worst time to drive in that particular area. So might be tomorrow now. Everything is packed. Medicine sorted. As for him, still in bed. Will not get up. I've given him painkillers and will go back and try again.Why is everything so difficult nowadays.xx
Sending hugs Casbow xxxx
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I don`t know what to say to you Casbow. You are living a nightmare.
Just sending a hug. (((.)))
I really feel for you Casbow Sending you warm ((hugs)) xx
Came on to see how you are Casbow - sending hugs xx
They finally came to assess us at 2.45. So now all has turned over til tomorrow. But he has been accepted and if respite goes well he can stay permanently. Now I have to wait til they sort out what I have to pay. Friday I was told he could go straight in. Oh well. At least he s still mine for now. The worst happened today. He suddenly dropped his trousers and pull ups and went to go on the settee. I managed to stop him but he was soiled when I got him to the bathroom. So this has confirmed that the time has come for me to let go. My dear man. So we wait again.xxxxxxx
Oh Casbow. I so feel for you.
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Casbow, such a difficult, heart breaking time. I think in some ways it was a bit easier for me as my husband had been in hospital for several weeks, just one of many stays, and it was decided there that he needed to be in a care home so he went straight from the hospital and I was able to tell him that it was a convalescent place as he still needed nursing care. He accepted that and it was a very smooth transition. It was still horrible having to accept that he could no longer be at home with me but the care he had there was very good on the whole and he settled well. I hope things work out well for you and your husband. xxx
I hope your husband is in respite care now Casbow and you are resting.
David is going into Nursing home today. It has been an awful few days. Because it is nursing it took longer to sort out funding and also he has 4 weeks respite with a view to staying if all is going ok and he settles. But the truth now is he cannot come home again. He is getting worse very quickly now,including dropping his trousers to poo on the settee. I just managed to pull them up again and then cleaned him in the bathroom.He wakes up about 5.00 am every morning now and has a noisy conversation with (The other people) in his room. Still will not get out of bed, but once he is up washed etc he spends most of the time singing and playing with his toys. So today I will not take him till the afternoon as I don't want to pressure myself trying to get him out of bed. I feel sick to the stomach and wish I could fast forward a month and see him settled and happy. If this home doesn't work out we will have to try another. I cannot continue with the double incontinence and the isolation. Last week had the doctor out twice and paramedics because David fell and I couldn't get him up. Paramedics insisted I get doctor out and made me promise to push for the respite. So there I am at the moment. Thank you all for your support. I will post again soon.xxx
Casbow I can't begin to imagine how you must feel. I will be thinking of you today. i hope that David settles well in this home and that you can move on to a settled time with him. Wishing you strength for today.
Will be thinking of you today Casbow, and sending you a cyber bouquet. And a big hug. xx
Thinking of you and sending supportive hugs. I hope all goes as smoothly as possible. Take care xx
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My heart goes out to you Casbow.
I believe your struggles have developed into a crisis situation and can only hope all will be resolved and David will settle, once he has a team trying to meet his needs , instead of you by yourself.
Oh Casbow today will be very hard for you and you have all our support to get you through it. Do whatever you need to do, try not to get too stressed. Keep yourself hydrated and try to eat something too. When you feel able to post we'll all be here for you xxx
Such a difficult time Casbow. My husband went into an assessment unit and we were asked to go along to a meeting of the professionals involved in his care. I thought it was to discuss the changes in his care taking place and be given some idea of when he would be coming home.
Yes, his on going medical needs were discussed but the sentence, ' you do realise that he won't be coming home, his needs are complex that even the most robust care plan available will not cover his needs' knocked me for six. Five years on I still shudder at the thought of that meeting.
I will be thinking of you both today, hopefully David will settle within the four weeks and you can breath easy. Caring won't stop it just changes, there will be someone to take over from you.
Thoughts and prayers for strength to get through today go with you xx
Thinking about you today Casbow.
Love and a great big hug