Caring for my lovely husband

[SammyTW]

It’s two and a half years since my husband was diagnosed with FTD (non behavioural variant). Early on a friend advised me to “look for pearls along the way” and we have and try to journey with thanksgiving. We both have a strong Christian faith and a very supportive Church family, as well as lots of love and support from our five children, so we’re really doing very well on a journey we certainly wouldn’t have chosen! Lots to still enjoy and be grateful for.

 

[Grannie G]

Welcome @SammyTW

I hope you will find this forum helpful and supportive.

It`s good to hear how much support you have from your family and community. I`m sure it is a great comfort to you

 

[Izzy]

Welcome from me too @SammyTW.

I’m sorry to hear about your husband’s diagnosis but I’m glad you’ve found this forum. I’m sure you will find understanding and support here.

I love the thought of looking for pearls along the way. Sometimes they’re hard to find but we need to make the most of them when we do find them.

Wishing you well.

 

[PookaB]

It’s two and a half years since my husband was diagnosed with FTD (non behavioural variant). Early on a friend advised me to “look for pearls along the way” and we have and try to journey with thanksgiving. We both have a strong Christian faith and a very supportive Church family, as well as lots of love and support from our five children, so we’re really doing very well on a journey we certainly wouldn’t have chosen! Lots to still enjoy and be grateful for.

We are all committed Christians too but our church wasn't very supportive all they could think of doing was dragging my husband and us up the front for prayers of healing and suggesting l put my husband into day care so l could get some so called 'Me Time' at that point my husband has full capacity apart from being aggressive and violent to me.

The last thing l wanted was to place him in a church day centre with all the elderly people so he could see how the disease would eventually progress. Also he was only 60 and didn't want to mix with 80 plus age groups!

We had to leave our church and just be with our friends and family. It's good you have the support of your church.

Initially we were thankful in so many ways and found the 'pearls'and many blessings along the journey. My faith continues to help me and my belief in Jesus Christ never wanes. But my husband doesn't know who we are, who he is, can't talk, can't walk unaided etc he has no capacity at all. He is aggressive to staff and thankfully is looked after by wonderful people who are so passionate about their job at a Neurological centre.
I ask God regularly to speak to my husband straight into his heart . This l find most comforting . Dementia will rob your loved one of everything but as a Christian it will never take their Salvation away.

 

[sdmhred]

Hello @SammyTW and @PookaB

i am also a Christian - the pearls have kept me going, but I can’t manage church. People did not approve of me caring for mum And kept asking me to come back to my volunteering which I couldnt do.

Id love a thread for Christians to support each other but I am not sure that would be allowed???

 

[Jools1402]

I am agnostic but understand how faith can be a huge comfort to people. Perhaps if you started a thread along the lines of "how my faith has helped me" then it wouldn't exclude anyone.

 

[sdmhred]

It would be interesting to hear from people of all faiths and none as to how religion has been helpful or not in their dementia journey……sometimes tho such discussions can become heated however which then ends up being counter productive