Can I ... Should I?

[Sam Luvit]

Morning @Toony Oony

Lol. I don’t mind & it don't matter is my catch phrase regarding pain. I can adapt that to relate to “friends” too

The Op was fine, unfortunately I now have a 1cm hole on my waistband line ... which is perfectly placed to cause maximum awkwardness while it heals. Still, it’s done & I can ignore it & wait for all clear results

Enjoy Sicily, I know it’s hard to switch off, but there is nothing you can do once you leave, so keep telling yourself to enjoy “this time”, as it’s time you can’t get back. Mum was really good about me going away at first, but got quite manipulative towards the end. I had to be selfish & decide I was going to relax & forget. I’ll admit that lots of rum helped

Once @Slugsta has returned to dry land, I’m sure we can sort a meet up, maybe if you both PM good / bad days to meet & where you are lol, we can start seeing when it could happen

 

[Sam Luvit]

Thank you @Amy in the US, although to be honest, I had an appointment the day before Mum passed, he attempted treatment & then wrote giving me a date to remove the thing. When I realised it was the day before mums funeral I almost cancelled, but I knew I wouId not rebook, so I made myself go. It’s done now & so far no pain. Only when I’ve caught the site on the seat belt & when my waistband caught it later on. I’m being more careful now

I’ve actually been quite spoilt by son, fiancé & his future FIL, they went out & got breakfast yesterday & today, ordered takeaway tonight for us all, including brother who came over. Fiancé baked me a lacto free chocolate cake & left me her recipe

Mums room has been put back to presentable, they got spare duvets in the high cupboard, then they helped me decant large volume of stuff out of my room so I can go through it tomorrow. The lounge has been restored after all the visitors left, washing up done, it’s so much further along with a little help

I’m gobsmacked to see the house is already up on line, a week earlier than I was aiming for, but they are happy to start marketing it immediately knowing I’m working through paperwork & clearing it out

I’m grabbing armfuls io hugs, topping up the many real life ones I’ve been showered with today & yesterday. You can never have too many hugs Thank you

 

[Sam Luvit]

Hi @rosy18

Yes. Thank heavens for TP & proper friends who don’t judge & are there no matter what. I’d not have survived the journey without you all.

Is it wrong to say I’m looking forward to next week? I know the reason I have to travel is a sad one, but the perfect opportunity to see you & @Margi29 is heaven sent

The hugs are lovely. @2jays made sure I got hugged by you all, it was like you were all there as we talked about you & she hugged me again & again

 

[Sam Luvit]

I’ll join the group hug for today. Thinking of you. X

Thank you Loving the hugging

 

[jugglingmum]

I'll send you a few hugs for the hug bank xx

 

[Sam Luvit]

Thank you @Margi29 ... I think we all needed hugs & we all gave lots out too. Brother really struggled, but was very strong. He had to stop part way through his eulogy, as his emotions got the better of him, but he did her proud. My heart just broke for him when he said he felt guilty for not showing his feelings & not thinking they were close. He said he didn’t realise until it was too late

When he sat down, I told him ..”she may not have said it, but she adored you” .. she did. Her face wouId light up when I said her son was coming over, or I was going to pick him up.

The priest saw brothers struggle & said a few words, just for him, basically telling brother he wouId get through it & suggested things he could do to help

Pooch. Well. He was just awful. He actually walked back into the house twice & wee’d up mums chair in the morning I so didn’t need that. He got into trouble, but I later accepted he was very upset & he’s not done it again thankfully.

 

[Sam Luvit]

It went better than I thought @jugglingmum ... even though SIL didn’t arrive until 5 minutes before the cars (she had things to do ), I told brother I refused to get stressed, if they didn’t arrive in time that was their issue

People sang, people said the nicest things to me about Mum & dad, I didn’t get nervous or stressed. I did cry a bit, but I kept it together enough to take it in & have those memories. Even the FD came over to brother & said his eulogy was very moving

I think her leaving after just a few hours, saying she had to go feed the cat (wow, it took all 3 of them to feed one cat), but she forgot to tell her husband. She was miffed at him going for a walk & sneered about him being a workaholic

Naturally the SIL had to show her true colours, but several other people stepped in & made it plain they didn’t think she was right. She tried the big show hug goodbye, but I wasn’t playing her game & no one bought her act

Brother was so hurt to come back & find they’d gone home & not even told him. He stayed with us. We made him welcome.

 

[Sam Luvit]

Thinking of you all today, Sam, and sending a cloud of hugs for later. X

Thank you, I’m smothered in hugs

 

[Sam Luvit]

Another huge hug for you and your family today

Thank you I’m loving this hugging

 

[Sam Luvit]

Thinking of you and your family today

Thank you I felt so calm, it was like you were all with me giving me courage

 

[Sam Luvit]

Yes Bon voyage - is it imminent ??
I feel a bit queezy thinking about it. (((((((((Sam)))))))))

Thanks for the hugs

 

[Margi29]

We were going to travel around the island on the bus, but after seeing luxury transport I may be tempted to try that @nitram

 

[Sam Luvit]

Morning @Slugsta

Hopefully you are medicated & all packed, now relaxing with tea, coffee or whatever your early morning kick start is

Fair winds & calm seas

 

[Sam Luvit]

Im sure all the glasses raised were therapeutic

Try and relax a bit now, eh?
((((((hugs)))))))

Morning @canary

The relaxing has to wait a few more days .. I’ve 2 more rooms to tidy up ... house sale beckons

 

[Sam Luvit]

Raised glasses...planning trips afar...distancing from an invisible selective friend...sounds good Sam

Morning @love.dad.but..

I very much want to spend some time solo, just looking at waves & green fields. Now I want to be the selective friend

 

[Sam Luvit]

... 'We do this, not because of who they are but because of who we are' and that is certainly true here. ...

Morning @Slugsta

Thank you for reminding me, it’s very true. Although, Mum became my mum in the last 5 weeks, no arguing, just hand holding, jokes & laughter. Somehow, the therapy broke some of my anger & I could accept she was shaped by her fears, rather than her dislike of me.

Love n hugs very welcome

 

[Sam Luvit]

Fair weather friends indeed @Margi29 ... I’ve no time for them.

Mum is out of pain, jiving with dad in between a few G&T’s. I can see them clearing the dance floor as dad takes her ‘off beat”

 

[Sam Luvit]

Hi @Margi29

Sorry you had such a bad night, more sorry I wasn’t there for you to rant at , think I was busy with something , but it might have been a distraction from one neighbour who wanted to tell me what an amazing friend she was to Mum ... that wouId be the one that Mum wouId scurry away & hide from

Chocolates & cakes ... the nectar of dementia. Although at the end Mum found everything too sweet. Maybe the obsession with salt is related to taking the sweetness away. I’ll never really know

Snug trousers .. I packed away mums tight fitted trousers, she was in jogging bottoms as her waist & bum expanded from all that cake & lashings of butter

Dad & I always did the packing. Otherwise it wouId have been all shoes, pants & lotions. No swimwear, no towel & no clothes Wouldn’t trust Mum to remember tickets or insurance, although she wouId probably have packed her passport somewhere “safe”

When searching for your Sea legs .... do not try to read ... get the wind on your face & look at the horizon. Look across the sea, but not down at it. If you’re standing, adopt the very lady like pose of ankles in line with your hips, knees slightly bent & sway against the waves, so you keep your head (& ears that give you balance) steady.

 

[Sam Luvit]

People & boat watching, while trekking out on a sand buggy, what an amazing holiday @nitram that is my idea of perfection

 

[Sam Luvit]

I'll send you a few hugs for the hug bank xx

Caught them ... thank you