Hopefully you will enjoy it, Scarlett, and wonder what you were worrying about but it is a bit daunting walking into a crowd of people you don't know. Just think about them all sitting on the loo
A song - and a cake!
- Thread starter Scarlett123
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I hope you had a good time, I'm sure you were welcomed with open arms, at least I hope you were. xxxxx
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Not daft Scarlett, just natural to be a bit apprehensive the first time, any of us would be.
How did it go Scarlett - hope the weather was good and the welcome warm.
Lilac
How did it go Scarlett - hope the weather was good and the welcome warm.
Lilac
Well, you win some, you lose some. 
I'd explained about myself, via email, to the organiser, who was very sympathetic. I was introduced to the other ladies, individually, and said I'd been a carer for John, who'd had AD for 12 years. So what did they do after tea? Discussed a book they'd been reading, about someone with Dementia!!!!
I can't remember the title, but I thought, fine, they're going to discuss a book I haven't read, I'll just try to look intelligent, and listen to the comments. I asked what it was about, and was shocked when told.
I said nothing, but when they started discussing and someone said "oh I think XYZ should have shown more understanding to the character ....", I realised this wasn't for me. The last thing I needed was someone spouting about how they felt a carer in a book should have acted. We've lived, or are living through this for real!
So I murmured "sorry, but this is too close to home for me" and left. But the scones, jam, cream, cakes and sandwiches were lovely.
I'd explained about myself, via email, to the organiser, who was very sympathetic. I was introduced to the other ladies, individually, and said I'd been a carer for John, who'd had AD for 12 years. So what did they do after tea? Discussed a book they'd been reading, about someone with Dementia!!!! I can't remember the title, but I thought, fine, they're going to discuss a book I haven't read, I'll just try to look intelligent, and listen to the comments. I asked what it was about, and was shocked when told.
I said nothing, but when they started discussing and someone said "oh I think XYZ should have shown more understanding to the character ....", I realised this wasn't for me. The last thing I needed was someone spouting about how they felt a carer in a book should have acted. We've lived, or are living through this for real!
So I murmured "sorry, but this is too close to home for me" and left. But the scones, jam, cream, cakes and sandwiches were lovely.
What a shame but you did the right thing & I'm pretty sure they won't judge you for it. Better to walk away than chew somebodies ear off at first meeting. Hope it won't put you off for future.
I can't believe that they could be so undiplomatic, I'm flabbergasted.
You definitely did the right thing by leaving, but I hope you enjoyed your scones with Jm and cream first.
Maybe next time, there will be a little more thought goes into any book discussed. J xx
You definitely did the right thing by leaving, but I hope you enjoyed your scones with Jm and cream first.
Maybe next time, there will be a little more thought goes into any book discussed. J xx
Our reading group discussed that one too, Scarlett, but one or two of them told me not to read it and I'm glad I didn't. When someone made critical comments I did venture to suggest that they perhaps didn't know until they lived with dementia themselves I was actually shot down by this person telling me she knew very well what she was talking about, thank you very much. I know her well and was quite stunned as, as far as I am aware, there is no history of this in her family but wondered if she is fearful of her husband starting to suffer as he is in his late 80s and getting a little forgetful. I think thIs was just some horrible coincidence, Scarlett, as the book had already been selected. It would have been wiser of them to have told you whIch book they had been dIscussing and invited you to the next meetIng instead, whIch might have had a very different outcome.
That's what I thought. Or reply to my email, and explain the content of the book (I didn't even know they were discussing anything, I thought we were just eating cake!), and leave me to decide what to do.
How dare that person say to you that she knew what she was talking about! People can be so insensitive. But, I must say the cakes were lovely.
Not letting it get me down. Off to Southend today with a mate, and got a reduced ticket (£17.50!) for Lord of the Dance tomorrow - going on my own. Have as good a weekend as possible everyone.
Hope you enjoyed visiting Southend with your friend, Scarlett - and Lord of the Dance sounds like a nice outing for yoday - enjoy!
It was really unfortunate that the organiser of the group did not think to mention to you firstly that the group would be discussing a book as well as enjoying refreshments. As you had introduced yourself by email I am amazed that she did not think to let you know that on this occasion the book was on the subject of dementia, giving you the option of joining next month.
I used to attend a reading group at our local library once a month. We took turns in choosing the book for discussion and had a month to read it ready to discuss at the next meeting.
If the organiser of the group has not been in touch with you since the meeting, why not contact her again because, if they discuss a book at each meeting, you would want to read the book and be prepared to take part.
I can certainly understand "too close to home" but I hope you will be able to go to the next meeting. xx
It was really unfortunate that the organiser of the group did not think to mention to you firstly that the group would be discussing a book as well as enjoying refreshments. As you had introduced yourself by email I am amazed that she did not think to let you know that on this occasion the book was on the subject of dementia, giving you the option of joining next month.
I used to attend a reading group at our local library once a month. We took turns in choosing the book for discussion and had a month to read it ready to discuss at the next meeting.
If the organiser of the group has not been in touch with you since the meeting, why not contact her again because, if they discuss a book at each meeting, you would want to read the book and be prepared to take part.
I can certainly understand "too close to home" but I hope you will be able to go to the next meeting. xx
