A life in the day of.........................

[Grannie G]

Dhiren seemed very sad today, not weepy or cross, just sad and subdued.
I asked if anything had happened but apparently not.

He ate the food I took but without the usual pleasure.

I got his book out. He took one look at it and said `Rubbish`, so I took it away quickly.

I sat with him for 3 hours, just holding his hand and stroking his arm. There was no point trying to jolly him along, I let him be.

I`m pleased I didn`t take it to heart as I have done in the past. He is allowed his off days.

 

[creativesarah]

well done sylvia sorry dhiren had an off day but glad ypiu coped with it ok

 

[Butter]

We all have off days, I suppose. There's no point pretending otherwise.

 

[amicalia]

Dhiren seemed very sad today, not weepy or cross, just sad and subdued.
I asked if anything had happened but apparently not.

He ate the food I took but without the usual pleasure.

I got his book out. He took one look at it and said `Rubbish`, so I took it away quickly.

I sat with him for 3 hours, just holding his hand and stroking his arm. There was no point trying to jolly him along, I let him be.

I`m pleased I didn`t take it to heart as I have done in the past. He is allowed his off days.

Bit of a hard visit for you but glad that you didn't take it personally, you are right, there are always going to be off days x

 

[Saffie]

That was a long time to sit there Sylvia. I hope it helped Dhiren.X

 

[cragmaid]

I think autumn mists must be in the air...Mum's been sort of sad too. Fingers crossed for a bit of sunshine tomorrow to brighten things up. x.x

 

[Helen33]

[QUOTEI`m pleased I didn`t take it to heart as I have done in the past. He is allowed his off days. ][/QUOTE]

Marvellous Sylvia. I agree, we should all be allowed off days as we are all human beings with or without dementia.

It is such a blessing that Dhiren's off days are few.

Love

 

[Grannie G]

I don`t know if it helped or not but it was all I could do.

I can`t go tomorrow. KCC is coming to sort the pager for my smoke alarm. There is no smoke alarm I can hear. They will come between 9am and 3pm.

 

[Grannie G]

That was a long time to sit there Sylvia. I hope it helped Dhiren.X

While I was sitting I had time to think.

I remembered the time when I went shopping and Dhiren stayed at home.

While I was out , unexpectedly, the heavens opened. As I hurried home, I turned the corner to see Dhiren coming to meet me carrying an umbrella. He had remembered I didn`t have one with me and he had come to help me . In his haste and full of anxiety he had forgotten his coat and was soaking.

 

[winda]

Oh Sylvia, that is so sweet .......... and sad.

 

[DeborahBlythe]

. In his haste and full of anxiety he had forgotten his coat and was soaking.

Bless him Sylvia. Always the gentleman. x

 

[Loopiloo]

I got his book out. He took one look at it and said `Rubbish`, so I took it away quickly.

I sat with him for 3 hours, just holding his hand and stroking his arm. There was no point trying to jolly him along, I let him be.

I`m pleased I didn`t take it to heart as I have done in the past. He is allowed his off days.

I'm pleased for you that you didn't take it to heart, Sylvia. It is a learning curve, isn't it. Knowing when to "let him be". But being there. I am gradually learning....

As I hurried home, I turned the corner to see Dhiren coming to meet me carrying an umbrella. He had remembered I didn`t have one with me and he had come to help me . In his haste and full of anxiety he had forgotten his coat and was soaking.

Sad, and moving.

Loo x

 

[Grannie G]

Paul went to visit today. He was upset because Dhiren really wanted to tell him something but didn`t have the language.

It is very difficult for Dhiren to initiate conversation. He has something to say but is unable to find the words. When I go, I can sometimes guess correctly but Paul finds it impossible.

 

[Butter]

I wonder if you visit together, occasionally.

 

[Grannie G]

I wonder if you visit together, occasionally.

No we don`t Butter.

When Dhiren first went into the home we agreed we would visit separately because when we were three, Dhiren switched off and relied on Paul and I keeping the conversation going.

At least he is still trying and Paul can cope, even though it upsets him.

We visit together for birthdays.

 

[BeckyJan]

I am sorry to hear that Paul was upset following the visit to his Dad. How frustrating for both of them - Dhiren trying to express something and Paul just not able to understand.
I wonder if Dhiren will still remember and be able to convey whatever it was to you on your next visit.

 

[creativesarah]

lots of support sylvia

 

[Izzy]

I'm sorry to hear Paul was upset Sylvia. It can't be easy. x

 

[Canadian Joanne]

Sorry to hear Paul was upset. It never becomes easy.

 

[Grannie G]

I had the same experience as Paul today.

Dhiren wanted to tell me something, started to tell me something, but was unable to articulate what he wanted to say.
So I interrupted him and said `You mustn`t worry about anything. Leave the worrying to me and I will sort everything out. Your job is to get well and build up your strength.`
And he replied, `I know.`
And I realised it is what I always say and I`ll tell Paul so it will make it easier for him next time.

We looked through his book today and he enjoyed it.

And then he said `I think I`ll sleep here tonight.`, as clear as could be.