A life in the day of.........................

[larivy]

glad dhiren had a good night sorry you had a headache i think that even though we manage to get some sleep we are still on edge and dont sleep properly i think thats what probably caused your headache glad its gone now
how clever you are Sylvia to speak all those languages love larivy

 

[Grannie G]

I am having a terrible time with Dhiren .

He was up for two hours last night wandering round the house.

Since 10.30am he has been agitated , backwards and forwards wanting to go out. Each time he tried the door I had to threaten him with the police as I am not prepared any longer to go trailing up and down the streets after him.

He refuses to eat or drink and for a diabetic it is dangerous.

I phoned the respite home to see if they will take him today. They will take him if a doctor sees him first to establish he has no infection.

We are waiting for a doctor to come out.

Now he is prepared to cooperate . I can`t believe it. He will do anything I ask. This is his home and he will stay here.

Who says people with dementia have no control over their behaviour?

 

[nellbelles]

Sylvia

You cannot carry on like this, you really do need a break.

The last time I really shouted at Tom, I was amazed that some of what I was shouting actually was remembered,

I hope Dhiren is still settled and will eat, at least snack.

 

[Winnie Kjaer]

Sylvia how I feel for you, it is absolutely awful for you to put up with and you are so tired of it all. Do you feel you would like a break from it all now, if so perhaps this is time to let Dhiren go. I know it is the last thing you really want, but can you go through another day like it tomorrow and again the next day? You have already decided on respite soon, perhaps you should allow it to be sooner than later, only you can decide. I am so sorry you are in this situation. I hope when you have seen the doctor you may feel you are able to make the right decision for both of you.

 

[Sandy]

Hi Sylvia,

Sorry that you are having a bad time. It's good that the respite home can step in when you need them.

Who says people with dementia have no control over their behaviour?

Some do at times, but usually only for a short period of time and then it's back to square one .

Take care,

 

[Grannie G]

There is something wrong. He has tried to eat some toast but the mouthful he took was so distasteful he hid it in his hand and then threw it under the table.
One minute he is pleading with me not to have him put in chains, the next minute he is telling me to go home [to my home] and leave him here to rot.
He is frightened.
I told him I`d found him a lovely convalescent home which is clean and comfortable with a lovely sitting room and dining room and bedroom, and he was pleased but asked if I was sure. Then within seconds he had forgotten and asked what harm he had done to me to make me `put him away`.

 

[Winnie Kjaer]

It is breaking my heart to read your post and I cannot imagine what it is doing to yours. Please keep strong, you love each other so much I am sure you will do whatever is best for both of you. I really am feeling for you Sylvia. Love

 

[Sandy]

There is something wrong. He has tried to eat some toast but the mouthful he took was so distasteful he hid it in his hand and then threw it under the table.

Sylvia, has this change in the taste of food come on suddenly?

There is this factsheet from the BBC health website on taste loss:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/ask_the_doctor/tasteloss.shtml

You're right to be worried about Dhiren not eating with his diabetes.

I told him I`d found him a lovely convalescent home which is clean and comfortable with a lovely sitting room and dining room and bedroom, and he was pleased but asked if I was sure. Then within seconds he had forgotten and asked what harm he had done to me to make me `put him away`.

That must be very distressing. Can you call on Paul to come over and offer some reassurance?

Take care,

 

[Grannie G]

I`m keeping Paul out of this.

He has to be up at 4am tomorrow and drive to Hathrow by 6am. to catch a plane to Germany. There he will Chair a meeting about Drug Regulation with a group he has never met.

He is already stressed out about his father and I cannot do this to him now. It will be enough for him to know what there is to know when he returns.

Dhiren is quiet now and sitting with his eyes closed. He still has not eaten. Everything I give him tastes `wrong`.

 

[BeckyJan]

Hello Sylvia:

Hang on in there - just for one more week and then you have that well deserved break!

Is Terry still reading your posts? I know he is always supporting you but it does good if he can follow the present pattern of Dhiren's behaviour. If this phase continues maybe there needs to be another review of medication

I hope you are getting enough sleep - that can make so much difference.

Love

 

[DMWalker]

Hello Sylvia,

I just want you to know I follow your posts with great interest and sadness. I think about you every day.

Love Dee x

 

[CYN]

Hi Sylvia, i always follow your story and you are an inspiration to all carers,and your concern not to worry Paul shows what a good Mum you are also. i do hope you will have some peace in your life soon. i am thinking of you both and hope for a good outcome.

take care love and hugs Cynthia x x

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you Dee.

Winnie, it`s breaking my heart too. Dhiren is now as quiet as a mouse , which makes me wonder what he is thinking but I daren`t ask.

Sandy I suspect Dhiren has lost his sense of smell and his taste is going too. His Glucose levels are fine though at 7.7. and he has just acceptd some milk.

I have had a PM from Terry our CPN. It is so reassuring to know he is aware of the situation even on a Sunday.

 

[Lynne]

Dear Sylvia,
your worry, frustration, fearfulness & love for Dhiren are all leaping off the screen at me; you are at your wits' end to know what to do for the best and so are we
- I so wish we could do something to help ...

We are waiting for a doctor to come out.

Do you have any idea of time when he/she might arrive? (I know you will have chased it up!)

Love x

 

[Grannie G]

Lynne I`m not chasing the doctor up. I`m almost fearful of a diagnosis and having to make a decision. I know by the time s/he comes Dhiren will be tearing at heart strings.

 

[Sandy]

At least his blood sugars are good and he has taken some milk. That is reassuring.

I'm sure you're right - if his sense of smell has diminished, it's bound to affect his sense of taste

 

[Skye]

Dear Sylvia

This is agonising for you. I hope the doctor comes soon.

Please, if he says it's OK, let Dhiren go for respite. You can't take any more of this.

Love,

 

[susiesue]

Sylvia, can't offer any constructive advice but you are always in my thoughts.


Love

 

[burfordthecat]

Sylvia

Just wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you and Dhiren.

Sent with loads of love and hugs

Carina x x

 

[Grannie G]

The doctor has just left. Dhiren has no infection.

I phoned the home to say I wouldn`t be taking him in today. He is very frightened and I would never get him there by myself.

He said he will go into a convalescent home next week. I don`t know whether to hold out till next week or try for tomorrow.

Cynthia , your picture is so beautiful. Thank you. Oh that we could all enjoy the peace it depicts.