Thanks for all your replies. I’ve spent a lot of last night composing our response in my head. I want to to cut this one off at the knees now as the SW is clearly dragging it out with his own agenda and not for MIL’s benefit.
We’ve always agreed that the residential home stay was for a trial period, not necessarily permanent and to use her “low mood” as emotional blackmail is disgusting.
MIL, at home for months, has been saying, “I want to die” “I’m fed up with being here” “Someone put me down” so, for him to try and insinuate that her depression because we are not allowing her to be discharged is disingenuous. The main reason we want her out of domiciliary care and into residential is for stimulation, social interaction and activities. Her own GP reported to us that she was clinically depressed before she even went into hospital.
I’m particularly outraged that he wants us to ‘justify’ in writing, our reasons for not allowing her home! I can only assume so he has the pleasure of reading them out to a distressed elderly lady? In my draft response I’ve said that we will not provide them, “as the matter has already been discussed at length with MIL. Whether she can recall and process and assimilate these conversations is a moot point, but you say she has mental capacity. “
If the NHS wish to pursue the route of the house being “a gift with reservation of benefits” we plan of trying to fight it on “best interests” I guess we could probably argue that by the SW’s action of delaying her discharge, he has further contributed to her “low mood” as by now, she would either have been happily settled in the residential home or close the end of her trial period there with the option she always had if returning to her own home.
We’ve always agreed that the residential home stay was for a trial period, not necessarily permanent and to use her “low mood” as emotional blackmail is disgusting.
MIL, at home for months, has been saying, “I want to die” “I’m fed up with being here” “Someone put me down” so, for him to try and insinuate that her depression because we are not allowing her to be discharged is disingenuous. The main reason we want her out of domiciliary care and into residential is for stimulation, social interaction and activities. Her own GP reported to us that she was clinically depressed before she even went into hospital.
I’m particularly outraged that he wants us to ‘justify’ in writing, our reasons for not allowing her home! I can only assume so he has the pleasure of reading them out to a distressed elderly lady? In my draft response I’ve said that we will not provide them, “as the matter has already been discussed at length with MIL. Whether she can recall and process and assimilate these conversations is a moot point, but you say she has mental capacity. “
If the NHS wish to pursue the route of the house being “a gift with reservation of benefits” we plan of trying to fight it on “best interests” I guess we could probably argue that by the SW’s action of delaying her discharge, he has further contributed to her “low mood” as by now, she would either have been happily settled in the residential home or close the end of her trial period there with the option she always had if returning to her own home.
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