Hello
@Dutchman I’m so sorry it has taken me an age to respond, but sometimes I hide away and lick my wounds, and sometimes that means that I don’t log on to TP as it can be too raw and honest. I hope you can understand.
Yes, it is so hard seeing such strong, articulate, capable and bossy people become dependant, self obsessed, incapable, and physically weak. They just disappear from our lives very slowly. They are there, but they aren’t there are they, at least not how we want them to be, and not how they should be.
I dread the future and what is going to happen. It’s also the not knowing. Nobody knows. How can we cope when we have no idea what tomorrow, next week, next year will bring?
My husband has a life, most of the time he is in his own world and I’m there caring for him. I’m his buffer. But at the moment, and certainly not for the foreseeable future, I don’t have a life because my husband is my whole life, and without him I am nothing. Without me he would be lost.
Perhaps one day I will be me again, but I can’t see that, as there is far too much water to go under the bridge before I find myself again.
Take care, love B xx